My husband never gives me any gifts nor says anything about Happy Anniversary, Happy Valentines day or Happy Birthday. He is happy when someone does something for HIM for an occasion but he doesn't do anything for me. Is this normal with guys or ?? I think it's pretty thoughtless myself :(
2007-02-14 18:20:31 · 23 answers · asked by knightenhaus 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Yes i understand your problem. Mine is the same way. I don't think they intend to do these things. They forget. He is comfortable with you. that is a good thing. There is really no need for the gifts. Its the time he spends with you. holding you at night, telling you that he loves you. And when he does do something. WOW its huge. You will appreciate it more. And know that he did it because he wanted to not because he was obligated to. You can tell him how you feel. he will probally feel bad you he disapointed. So what did you do for him ? or was it more that they are expected by most us woman to do these things to show they care.
2007-02-14 18:35:04 · answer #1 · answered by luvtopaint 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Happy Valentines To My Husband
2016-12-11 04:02:18 · answer #2 · answered by buono 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mine is the exact same. He says he doesn't want anything so I guess he feels like I don't need anything. I drop hints ALL THE TIME and he makes comments like "don't get your hopes up". Our 5 year anniversary: dinner with our son at his fav place, same as every other anniversary...no card or gift. Birthday: a bottle of perfume the day of because my son told him to...the place I wanted to eat at was "too far". Christmas: He got me one gift which I guess I should be grateful but it just hurts. It's almost like he has to do something to keep the peace.When I tell him about my friends anniversaries, birthdays, etc. he says he is not like that and those guys are stupid. Girl, I KNOW how you feel. What do we do?
2007-02-15 01:47:48 · answer #3 · answered by hoopsmom! 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some men have a difficult time showing their emotions. Some also have a hard time remembering when those occaisions even take place. I have been disabled for over a year and I don't get out of the house much. I didn't even remember to get my wife a card. She is so wonderful... She came home today and fixed me dinner. We have been married 31 years and I still am crazy in love with her.
I would like to tell you, HAPPY VALENTINES DAY! (For your husband) Have a great day too.
Eds
2007-02-14 19:25:37 · answer #4 · answered by Eds 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would feel sad. I am not one to expect much on Hallmark holidays but a Happy VDay and a piece of chocolate is a nice sentiment.
Sounds like everything is on his schedule. It's okay to have things you want in a marriage and if this is a deal breaker for you then tell him. You wanting him to acknowledge these holidays and do special things for you is okay. Women get such a bad rap as being nags if we like to get some love in this area every once and a while.
Don't you hate it when this stuff happens after you've already gotten married??!!
2007-02-14 18:34:56 · answer #5 · answered by GranolaGurl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, some people just hate to say "happy birthday " or "valentine" or whatever. i am not a man but i hate it so very much. it is like i should kill everything inside of me first and only after that i will be able to say "happy whatever" to my husband or kids or whatever. and i hate those anniversaries. it doesn't mean i don't love my kids and my man. i do love them, i just hate this pretenciousness. and valentine is the lamest holiday ever on earth. it is like made for wives and hubbies to quarrel because of stupid things like flowers and postcards. i am sure your man can compensate it with smth.
and by the way the first one who answered your question was saying the truth - this is this obligation what makes it so unpleasant. all the rest were 12 years old kids with childish point of view on life.
2007-02-14 18:28:34 · answer #6 · answered by jacky 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh ya I know what you're talking about, my husband is the same...but I got over it cuz we have been married for 10 years now...I still get jealous of other couples though, u know the ones that still hold hands and kiss and go out on Valentine's and make a fuss on their wedding anniversary...but I learnt to deal with that too, I make fun of these couples...irony helps me a lot.
2007-02-14 18:36:16 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it were JUST about the compulsory Valentine's Day gesture, I'd take his side, but if he NEVER gives you gifts, I say that borders on selfish hedonism. Most guys think about themselves more than about others because they lack compassion in general compared to women, but I think he's a bit overboard.
I don't like Valentine's Day. I prefer to do things without society compelling me to action.
Ask yourself to honestly consider if he NEVER does anything for you. I doubt that's the case. However, you should really express your concern to him, perhaps after you cook him a nice meal and rub his back or something. Bad communication dooms marriages. "Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." --Theodore "Seuss" Giesel
2007-02-14 18:27:19 · answer #8 · answered by Fergi the Great 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry to hear that... HAPPY VALENTINE"S DAY.... by the way is he a Leo? no offense to other Leos out there but some act like real jerks. you should ask your husband what the deal is!
2007-02-14 18:29:50 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that he's being sensible. I'm not into holidays, traditions and gift-giving. It's especially bad when done because of obligation.
In all honesty, Valentine's day is rather ridiculous...on the level of Halloween. It might be okay for teenagers, but for grown adults? I mean...come on.
Now let me see - as I understand this, you're upset because your husband doesn't say "Happy Valentine's Day"? ROTFL!
Is he a decent man in all other regards?
2007-02-14 18:22:59 · answer #10 · answered by Joseph C 5 · 1⤊ 3⤋