When will women accept their bodies and make do with what they were blessed with?

Question

I've just about had it with people (especially women) who think they need to look like Lindsay Lohan to be accepted. I've also had it with people who attack Tyra Banks and Oprah for being overweight. Being skinny sells and being fat sells but there are tens of millions of men and women who feel horrible about their body image. I lost 60 lbs and I felt great but I regained the weight within 18 months. Too many people purchase "crap" that claims to lose weight. Many TV shows have addressed eating disorders over the past 2 decades but people continue to starve themselves to death. The body was built for food and exercise - not listening to suicide songs like "You're Beautiful" from a troubled ex-British military officer. Come on, explain to me why this obsession with body image.

Dear jamaica and Pop - feel free to edit your answers and include a more intelligent answer. I'm asking this question because the media has become infatuated with the skinny and the buxom and millions of people in the middle are starving themselves and/or spending money to look like either.

Shame on me - I meant to say "make due" not "make do." The question is also applicable to men. The poster who mentioned butt implants is on the money because the question isn't only about anorexia.

Dear Who Knew! - Oprah is powerful in her own right and a woman, Nina Tassler, runs CBS' Entertainment Division. There are more women in network TV but remember the stink over Katie Couric's hips being airbrushed?

Answer 1

girls think that they have to have the perfect body or they wont be accepted by men because guys never admit to liking bigger girls...also i think that we are instinctly obsessed with body image because of the need to reproduce...the best survive and the others die...i am also fed up with girls thinking that they are fat when they only weigh 125 lbs....i love my body...it would be nice to lose some extra weight but i dont ever feel that it is necessary and i love the way i am...and no i am not one of those skinny a** girls that just think they have fat...i am a bigger girl and have been my whole life...i used to think that i needed to lose weight and it took me a while to accept my body for what it is and right now, i am truely happy with it and i will be because no one has the right to judge me except myself...and as long as i love myself then that is all that matters in life...i only wish that other girls out there would see themselves for what they are and what they are born with and to try and please themselves before men...thats what leads to true happiness...and for some reason the girls that are obsessed with looking good, losing weight, etc. always end up being the most judgemental and that is the most unattractive thing in a person whether male or female...we should learn to accept ourselves and others for who we truely are and not for what we look like.

Answer 2

It's a vicious cycle between the media and people that buy the fashion magazines, watch the tv programs, buy diet aids, etc. It's a bit like the chicken-egg quandry:

Is it the people who buy the magazines and watch the shows wanting images of young, skinny women?
OR is that media force-feeding (no pun intended) the public on images of skinny women to define for the rest of us what beauty is?

Either way, collectively, society needs to make a stand on what defines beauty. Already, I think the tide is shifting. Positive role models like Tyra, who publicly speak-out on this issue will gradually bring about change.

I am a curvaceous size 14 and I have never been happier in my own skin than now (I once dieted like crazy to be an 8 or 10). Bottom line: confidence comes from within and I wish more people could come to accept themselves.

Answer 3

It is because of all the exploitation of women in the media. If a celebrity loses or gains weight it is made a headline! Plastic surgery is the biggest growing industry in the U.S. especially California.

For god's sake they even have a yearly magazine pointing our the 50 most beautiful women/men. Hello, they are all beautiful. Where do they have a magazine, show, article about an average woman/ or man that is considered an Icon of beauty. NEVER!

With the media, t.v. shows, news. etc being everywhere it is bound to make many self conscious. Even in soap operas! If a woman or man already voted as one of the most beautiful or sexy is having surgery done to make themselves 'more' beautiful. What makes us, feel that we are up to "standard". It is hard to ignore those things.

Women are very caddy. They talk about each other, riping each other to pieces judging, criticizing one another comparing one another. It really is awful.

Women feel what people say, not just let it in and out. We feel, analyze and apply it to ourselves.

I blame it on the MEDIA of all forms.

Answer 4

It is hard for some people to realise that they don't need surgery, crash diets etc to look like celebrities, I personally would never want to look like a celebrity- every second one of them look the same.
Most people need to come to terms with the fact that it does not matter what size and/or shape you are as long as you are happy and healthy. If someone is morbidly obese then yes of course they need to lose weight, but not to look like every one else but to ensure that they dont get health problems or depression etc which can lead to death.
There are so many more important issues in the world and even though who may come across self conscious and want to follow these celebrities are in my eyes selfish if that is all that concerns them.

** In regards to the cosmetic surgery side of things I am having surgery to reduce an excessively large bust but I wouldn't ever have any other work done.

Answer 5

its simple- the media. if you've noticed, our culture is obsessed with hollywood and entertainment and actors. main word being "actors". they act, they are meant to look a certain way that producers think is appealing to ppl. for some reason our society is not content with watching the screen and looking at ppl that look just like us. most ppl dote on those who look glamorous and whose bodies are unattainable. its ridiculous, i agree but it is so ingrained in our culture i dont know when it will ever end. well theyre trying to put in some standards for runways models, hopefully rejecting those that look totally anorexic and probably only keeping those that look semi-anorexic. sigh.

if u go to certain parts of africa or the carribean its the opposite. no one wants a woman that looks stick thin. they think something is wrong with her. they love curves and meat on the bones. its just culture differences.

i think the fact that the hip hop culture is totally taking over the US is affecting things too. obviously the girls in the videos are voluptuous and all they talk about are big butts. i just saw a question on here about how a girl can make her hips bigger. and butt implant stats are going up (thank you dr.90210 on E! lol). i think theres a bit of a change in the tide coming. im personally one of those ppl that actually wishes she werent so damn skinny. it just doesnt feel right. guess the grass is always greener. good question.

Answer 6

Most women need "feedback" in order to believe the truth that we're all beautiful in different ways but, nonetheless, we're beautiful.

Most men will NOT pay any attention to a fat or older woman, much less a fat, older woman. We all need to learn to compliment each other and be kinder to each other. I'm lucky, I got control over that negative self-image diet roller coaster that so many get on by resorting to weight lifting but it's hard to say "I'm OK with being a size 12 (or whatever)" when the guys are all drooling over the anorexic waif in size 4's.

Answer 7

Answers like Pops don't help matters any. Young girls, I've seen them as young as six and seven think they are fat and need to diet. It's sad that their parents are not helping with this image problem any. I am not a young spring chicken anymore. I've had two children, the last after I broke my pelvis and couldn't move during my pregnancy. I certainly still need to lose the weight I gained during pregnancy but it doesn't change who I am. I wasn't considered skinny before, but I was healthy. Change needs to start on the inside of the person and they need to believe in who they are the way the are.

Answer 8

It's media. Everyone gets bombarded with 10000 images every day, and they almost all show the thin beautiful woman getting whatever she wants. The subliminal message is 'if you look like this, you too can have the perfect glamourous life'. We know it's crap, but it gets into your subconscious, and the only way to get it out would be to stop showing all of those images and show nothing but normal women for many years, until your brain starts telling you that you should look like them. I read this article in a magazine about skinny celebs like Kiera Knightley and Nicole Ricthie, and they showed pictures of them in bikinis, and even though I know that they are dangerously underweight, my brain tells me they look fine. I hate it.

Answer 9

You and I know this. But the message is not getting through. And the problem is about control, or a lack there of.

I wish I had an answer for you. As long as there are supposed "ideals" of what is "beautiful", we women will try to accommodate in order to get GREAT sex (not the mediocre stuff we usually get). Are we silly to keep hoping?

Answer 10

Can't explain it, it's just self image. If you feel ok with the way you look then it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. Don't worry about it, the only person it should matter to is you, if others don't like the way you look, who cares anyway, they probably don't look as good as they think they do anyway. You only have to please yourself.