So, I'm watching "Big Love" and am wondering exactly what is wrong with polygamy?

Question

I mean, I understand the basic arguments about coercion and the demise of "marriage" but why is it so horrible if all involved are consenting adults?

Everyone seems to assume I'm talking about ONLY a man with several wives. Why can't a woman have several husbands?

Answer 1

Personally i see nothing wrong with polygamy, provided that the husband can equally provide to his wives both in emotional and financial terms. Which is rare but can still happen. Its a better alternative than getting divorced or even worse having an affair.

On the other hand you know that women today, even in societies where polygamy is acceptable, would never accept a second wife. Thats why i wouldnt advice any guy to do so unless your wife is ok with it. Or else your life can be a living Hell.

Answer 2

Did you ever notice when the men who are practicing polygamists that they say their multiple wives do not want multiple husbands.How would these young wives who are still in their teens truly know who they love or what they want to do with their life.It appears to me these young girls enter into a "marriage" that at best is non traditional. I can understand what the husband gets from this arrangement but what do the young girls get from it. They are mostly young girls rushed from their parents home into a polygimist marriage. What could these girls possibly know about other alternatives if they are not exposed to anything else.To me they are rushed into marriage and have many children in succession. I have never seen a show on a wife having multiple husbands.If I've missed the show, let me know.Did you ever wonder why these men never seek out a woman their own age after the first wife. It is almost like the first wife is the housemother.I just cannot believe that that many wives and one husband can live in domestic bliss like they profess. I try not to judge others but my wedding vows said that my husband was to be faithful to me, forsaking all others.What do their vows say?Young children promised as brides are not consenting adults.

Answer 3

In America, polygamy is against the law because when America was established the founding fathers didn't practice polygamy and they made it against the law.

Marriage practices and human mating patterns are a product of the economic and social mores/values of each culture. There have been societies where men had one wife, many wives, one wife and concubines, group marriages, brothers sharing the same wife.

Most marriage practices in the past have been based on the economic conditions of the society. Most marriages were arranged to benefit the families involved and to insure the care of any children.

One big reason for the mass immigration to the U.S. in the 19th and 20th centuries so that people could marry who they wanted not who their families wanted them to marry.

Answer 4

there isn't anything legally wrong. the issues come up with divorce (of one not all parties) , child support, government aid, and other monetary issues. some polygamists do steal money in the way of getting on child support because they can't afford all the children.
but outside of a religious pretext there could/would/is birth control used.


if everyone consents there is nothing wrong and no arguments against it. there is also polyandry and ploy-amorous-

polyandry is one girl with many wives

poly-amorous is where its mixed genders (there is no set sexuality in the group. sometimes two people in the marriage are non-sexual with each other, but sexual with other spouses)

religion also gets in the way of legalizing it.

look up 'polys'- modern day, underground poly-amorous people.
the book 'ethical slut' is very good. I'm still reading it, but the half I've gotten through was very enlightening

Answer 5

The questions are the same as those that are raised about gay marriage -- do we want to extend legal protection to this type of relationship (or do we want to prohibit it legally)?
Unlike most gay relationships, polygamous marriages are not true "marriages," but rather a way for massogynist societies to subjugate young women and keep them in relative poverty and servitude.
Beyond the practice by certain extremist LDS groups, it would simply become a nightmare structurally. So, 5 people want to get married -- who gets the tax benefit? Who are the childrens' natural parents (absent an agreement)? What prevents a whole town from marrying each other to gain health benefits, property distribution, child rearing enterprises? These problems don't exist when we're talking about 2 people (regardless of gender), but it's way too easy to exploit when any number will do.

Now, as far as criminalization goes, a simple polyamorous relationship is fine, but forced marriages that end up with impoverished, abused, neglected teen women are a different story.

Answer 6

I don't see the problem with it. Given the state that marriage is in in this country today the chances of them staying togeather in a poligamist marriage is probly better than it is for monogomas people. As long as the tax payer is not asked to foot the bill for the children that they Have. I'd say let them have at it, isn't it supposed to be about freedom in this country?

Answer 7

it's not the act of polygamy that repulses people it's the religious conotation to it that people have against it. yet it is perfectly ok for people to fornicate and co habitate w/o the benefits of marriage. it's the groups who are doing unspeakable things that make it taboo. polygamy is happening all over this country but you wouldn't know it b/c most people practicing it are going a/b it in the correct manner. so that's why people have a problem w/ it. b/c of the sickos molesting children and forcing marriages on young girls. not polygamy itself.

Answer 8

Because it's stupid, I mean, who actually would WANT more than one wife or husband?? Doesn't that seem like some punishment?
If one wants to screw around with as many whores (men whores too) as they want all the time, don't get married and definitely don't have kids.

Answer 9

As long as they are all consenting adults and I'm not supporting them with my tax $$ (like welfare and food stamps), I could care less how many people agree to live together.