I'm so preoccupied all the time with not hurting people's feelings, that's it's infringing on my own success?

Question

It starts with the fact that:
1. I myself am so sensitive that I get hurt easily by others. I'm actually *too* empathic. Which means that:
2. I often get hurt as a RESULT of trying to protect others from pain.

Problem is, I'm starting to wonder if that "pain" is something I'm projecting onto them and *assuming* they'll experience, given the fact that if I were in their position, I would? (due to the abovementioned oversensitivity).

Anyway, bottom line is, I'll work hard to prevent anything bad from happening to them, but in the end bear the brunt of it myself; they often end up getting what they want and never knowing I got hurt in the process.

So either I'm too sensitive, or other people are too selfish/unaware. Or both? Either way, I'm sick of it.

Answer 1

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You cannot be too sensitive—your conscience is more developed than your less sensitive friends', family members' and acquaintances'. Without the more highly evolved, super-sensitive people, we wouldn't have the best in music, in art, in most fields.

Try going into an area of work where there are other sensitive people...stay away from the brash, rude types, and especially those that say you should change, thicken your skin, and that kind of thing. We're evolving from the planet of the apes to the planet of human beings, not going backwards. Good luck! =)

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Answer 2

Trust me people are both. I am like you and I end up hurt all the time. I am used constatly and when I try to point out things that happen or prove a lie that was told to me things get switched around to make me look bad and end results...my feeling get hurt. It won't change because that is the way we are. Giving people and giving people always get hurt. I feel for you but always keep your chin up there is someone out there that truely loves you for what and who you are.

Answer 3

I have to go with others being unaware!! Hands down!! @8-)
You can't protect or save all of your friends and acquaintances and you can give that up too!! Start trying to notice how less affected they are!! Good Luck!! @8-) And if you are sensitive, keep it to yourself when you are in uncharted waters. Know who everyone is before you open yourself up to be hurt. OK? OK!!
Happy Valentine's Day!! @8-)

Answer 4

You are living in a stage that Marshall Rosenberg calls "emotional slavery" and it really doesn't help others at all.
I would recommend Studying marshall rosenberg's ideas
of radical honestly. you really have no idea what's going on with others. only a guess. you are not too sensitive and others are not too selfish. you just lack the skills to handle a situation where needs are in conflict.
Get the book "Radical Honesty" by Marshall Rosenberg.

Answer 5

Now that you are aware of this you can STOP IT!!!!! Pick your battles or situations. Your time is too precious to be wasting your energy on other people. Maybe your are preventing them from really experiencing the necessary pain of something to really learn from it! Also you could be avoiding your own pain by focusing on others. What are you avoiding about yourself?

Answer 6

The BEST people possess...
The capacity for sacrifice,
the courage to take risks,
and a feeling for beauty.
Unfortunately,
Their virtures make them vulnerable.
They are often wounded,
sometimes destroyed.

Answer 7

a pair of them have yep. human beings attempt to placed on a the front about it "only being digital actuality", yet all and sundry is a man or woman in the back of the demonstrate screen, all and sundry can get harm by technique of the moves of others, esp those they care about.

Answer 8

You are on the right track, volunteer some of your spare time to charity in your area.More people like you is what this world needs

Answer 9

be kind to animals, children, the afflicted and truly stupid people (its not their fault)
be honest to all others especially the willingly ignorant
honesty (at least in the long term) is the best policy

Answer 10

people dont know or even care about what you think of them.you dont need to be appaligetic or empethic . people dont know the differance its all in your head. im trying to tell my self the same thing. they have there own problems.