Telling people things they want to hear.?

Question

I have noticed something about Yahoo Answers.
Something I have never been too good at.

I have a tendancy to speak my mind. I tell it like I see it. I am blunt.
Often, people choose the answer that best suits them, whether or not it is true or false. I haved experienced that myself on several occasions. I suppose it could be some sort "Hard-Headed" type problem.

It's like trying to answer the old "How do you like the dress I am wearing." conundrum.

This relates directly to interviews. The same exact thing happens.
They are looking for an answer that best suits them, whether or not it is true or false.

Do you see any similarity between the two?

This thinking has lead me to the following questions:
What "On the spot" answers do you tend to give.
The honest truth, or something they want to hear?
Which, in your opinion, is the better answer?

Answer 1

I always tell the answer that is truthful, not flattering or advantageous.
Many of the people that I have dealt with in my life have been offended when I didn't tend to their feelings and ego.
But my friends are my true friends and for one underlying reason: they always know where they stand with me. When I tell them something, they know it's really how I feel.
There is a certain respect that comes from being a person of your word, and playing to the audience is not keeping your word. Because life will throw you a curve, you'll have to go back on something that you said to someone else. Then your word (and most of your opinions) are worthless to everyone.
If I chose not to answer because I want to spare the person's feelings or I think that my answer is not what they are looking for, then either I'll tell them that or simply leave it at "I'm not answering that for my own reasons." But they still are getting a truthful answer.

Someone once said and I've always considered it when facing a tough choice of whether to answer or not: "It is better to keep one's mouth shut and be thought a fool, than to open it and remove all doubt."

P.S. About the employment thing, always tell the truth in an interview. Any interviewer worth two cents will instantly pick up that something's BS. Then you have no credibility for your actual skills and abilities. You say they want an answer whether it's true or false that best suits them. Well of course they do!! They have a position to fill and the questions are aimed at getting to whether you are the person to fill it. All interview questions are interrogative and have a specific point to them. It's not necessarily what the answer is, it's what the answer tells them about you. Be truthful and pursue jobs that you are actually qualified for and interested in, not just something to bring in a paycheck (unless of course you find yourself in a desparate situation).

Answer 2

I interview people everyday of my life. I like honest answers, but I also like to see a little political savvy.

If I interviewed you and asked you what your weaknesses were or what soft skills don't you have, you can answer the question one of two ways.

1. I am really blunt and I tend to say what I think.
2. I speak my mind, sometimes it comes out wrong, but I mean it in the best possible way. I am still learning to catch myself so I don't inadvertently offend the person I am speaking to.

I much prefer answer number two. Being aware of your tendencies is one thing. Doing something about them puts you ahead of the pack.

When it comes to the relationship side, the old "dress conundrum" hopefully you can wrangle yourself a partner that appreciates your bluntness. If it's not in you to coddle, then don't.

I've noticed the same thing on Yahoo, about 25% of the time people prefer to go with the answer that makes them feel good. But I think the rest of the time people pick the answer that is well rounded.

Answer 3

Well, I am usually honest about what I tell the employer to a point. I don't lie but I don't tell them things that would jeopordize me from not getting hired. I definately try not to sugar coat it.

Although from an employer point of view: when I give interviews I get people who do that tell me what I would like to hear... Unfortuanately, truth comes out later and can potentially bite you in the rear which could lead to the employment adds yet again... So I would just be honest about it....

Answer 4

What they want to hear.

It is best to rehearse for these things.