English Deutsch Français Italiano Español Português 繁體中文 Bahasa Indonesia Tiếng Việt ภาษาไทย
All categories

19 answers

Loving people unconditionally brings one peace of mind, and happiness. Patiently read this.
*What in the world is the difference between loving a person, and being attached to them? Love is the sincere wish, for others to be happy and to be free from suffering. Having realistically realized other’s kindness, as well as their faults, Love is Always focused on the other person’s welfare. We have no ulterior intensions or motives to fulfill our own self-interests; or to fulfill our own desires, we love others, all people, simply because they exist. Attachment, on the other hand, exaggerates others’ good qualities, and makes us crave to be with them. When we’re with them, we are happy, but when we’re separated from them, we’re miserable. Attachments are always linked with expectations of what others should be, or what they should do for us. Is love, as it is understood in most societies, really love OR attachment ? Let us examine this a little more. Generally speaking, we are attracted {drawn to) people because they have qualities we value, or because they help us in some way. If we carefully observe, through introspection, our own thought processes we’ll notice that we very often look for specific qualities in others. Some of these qualities we are drawn to are qualities within our parents, or qualities which society values.
We examine someone’s looks, education, social status, financial status, and so forth. This is how Most of us decide on whether or not the person holds any true value, or not. In addition, we judge people as worthwhile according to how they relate to us. If they praise us, encourage us, help us, if they listen to what we have to say, if they make us feel secure, if they take care of us when were sick, unhappy or depressed, we consider them good, or sometimes righteous people, and these are the people we more drawn to, whom we are most likely attracted to, and the people we choose to be around with.
In all honesty, this is very biased, for we are judging them, only in terms of how they relate to us, as if we are the most important person in the world & thinking the world revolves around us! After we’ve judged certain people to be good for us, whenever we see them, it appears to us as if goodness is radiating out from within them, but as we are more mindfully aware, we realize that we have projected this goodness on to them.
Desiring to be the people who make us feel good, we become emotional yo-yo’s, when we’re with these people, we’re up, but when we’re not with them, we’re down. Furthermore, we form fixed concepts of what our relationships with these people will be, and thus have expectations of them. “When they do not live up to our expectations of them, we’re unhappy, disappointed or may even become angry. We want them to change so that they will match what we think they are. But our projections and expectations come from our own minds, not from other people. Our problems arise not because others aren’t who we thought they were, but because we mistakenly thought they were something they were not. We often use a type of Checklist also. Checklist: “I Love You IF ___________ !” This Love is Conditional and what we call love, is most often attachment. It is actually an attitude which overestimates the qualities of another person.
’Then we cling tightly to that person, thinking our peace and happiness depends on that person. We even often blame that person for our unhappiness.’ Love, on the other hand, is a very patient, calm, optimistic and relaxed attitude. We want others to be free from suffering and to be happy simply because they exist. While attachments are uncontrolled, and too emotionally sentimental, Love is Patient, powerful, and controlled(disciplined). Attachment obscures our judgment {our ability to make sound, wise decisions), and we become impatient, angry, and impartial – helping our dear ones, and those who do us no harm. Love clarifies our mind, & we access a situation by thinking of the greatest good for everyone. Attachment is based on selfishness, while love is founded on valuing, & cherishing others, even those who do not look very appealing to us. Love always looks beyond all the superficial appearances and dwells on the fact that they are just like us: they want peace of mind, happiness, and wish to avoid suffering. If we see unattractive, or unintelligent people we most often feel repulsed, because our selfish minds want to find attractive, intelligent, and talented people. On the other hand, Love never evaluates others by theses superficial standards and looks much deeper into the person. Love recognizes that regardless of the others appearances, they’re experiences are they same as ours: they want inner mental peace, happiness, and wish to be from suffering. When we’re attached, we’re not mentally, emotionally, & spiritually free. For we overly depend on, and cling to another person, to fulfill our emotional, mental, and spiritual needs. We fear losing the person, fearing that we’d be incomplete without them.” This does Not mean that we should suppress all our emotional needs, or become aloof, and totally independent, for that too would not solve the problem. We must simply realize our unrealistic needs and slowly, gently and patiently – seek to eliminate them. If we try to suppress them, pretending they do not exist, we become insecure, anxious, or possibly depressed. In this case, we do our best to fulfill our needs, while simultaneously working gradually to subdue them. The core problem is that most of us seek to be loved, rather than to love. We yearn to be understood by others, rather than to understand them. Our sense of emotional insecurities comes from the selfish obscuring of our own minds. We develop confidence by recognizing our inner potential to become a Selfless human being, having many magnificent qualities, then we’ll develop and have an accurate perception of ourselves, gaining self-confidence. We’ll seek to increase true unconditional love, to increase compassion, to cultivate patience, as well as generosity, right concentration and wisdom. Under the influence of attachment, we’re bound by our unstable emotional reactions to others. When they’re nice to us, we’re happy, but when they ignore us or speak sharply to us, we take it personally, and are unhappy. But pacifying attachment doesn’t mean we become hard-hearted, rather without attachments, there will be space in our hearts and minds for genuine affection and impartial love for them. And as a result, we’ll be more actively involved with them. As we learn to transform our minds & lives, through subduing our attachments, we can definitely have successful friendships, and personal relationships with others. These relationships will be richer, more meaningful because of the freedom and respect the relationships are based on. We’ll really care about the happiness and misery of all human beings equally, simply because everyone is the same inside: we all want inner peace of mind, Happiness, and to be from suffering.
However, of course, our lifestyles and interests may be a bit more compatible with some people. Our friendships and our personal relationships will be based on mutual interests, and to help other people. Having such an attitude, we’ll be much More Patient, & tolerant toward others; will remain mentally calm, having Peace of Mind and Happiness, and we’ll communicate successfully with others in life.*

2007-02-15 04:24:15 · answer #1 · answered by Thomas 6 · 2 0

No, it is because religious man like to have better sex with their wives. The wives on the other hand, they pretend that are moral by denying certain "positions & tricks". Then the man implys the old biblic right of beeing the leader of the family in order to take "what he want 's from his wife" but at the same time to relieve her from guilt! Then the "fight" starts! Women do not understand that! They "fight" back. It is silly, I know, but that is the source of this war: better sex! Girls give us, please, what we want! The fight will stop!

Is that realy you in the picture? Great body!

2007-02-14 06:50:13 · answer #2 · answered by filip 4 · 1 0

Oh I know you didn't - lol We men act in such ways because you dear, beautiful creature allow us to take control. Most women are afraid for whatever reason to make a decision about most anything. We can ask something of you and 9 out of 10 times it's - "Well I don't know - what do you think" "I don't know - where do you want to go or do" You ladies want to be Goddess then step up to the plate and take charge once and awhile....

2007-02-14 06:40:35 · answer #3 · answered by Grandfather Oak 3 · 2 0

I never knew that there was a religious war between wives and husbands.....and I KNOW that I'm not God. Me and my wife have an excellant relationship.

2007-02-14 06:39:38 · answer #4 · answered by cajunrescuemedic 6 · 1 1

Pointing palms of blame in elementary words motives more desirable harm and resolves no longer something. the information of "covenant" has been lost. A covenant (vow) replaced into entered into for lifestyles - till between both died. the marriage covenant is different than maximum covenants in that once 2 human beings are married, both develop into one flesh in the eyes of God. This "one flesh" is damaged into to halves even as divorce ends the covenant, and neither is then "entire". Hearts are damaged, and no count how amicable the divorce, the end results of divorce result little ones, kinfolk, and acquaintances. the outcomes at the on the spot are not punishment from God for divorcing, they're only the precise results of divorce. God is often used with some distance more desirable sensible than we do what we are able to conflict through from particular selections we make, because of this He gave us practise to stay by technique of with the intention to stay away from discomfort and suffering that could want to be prevented. because of this Jesus stated in Matthew 19:7-8: The Pharisees requested Jesus, "Why did Moses say that a guy might want to write out divorce papers and deliver his spouse away?" 8 Jesus spoke back, "you're so heartless! that's why Moses allowed you to divorce your spouse. yet from the starting up God did not intend it to be that way. no you likely can argue that there are marriages that can not proceed to be intact with the aid of abuse, forget, and/or lifestyles endangerment. although, in our western subculture it has develop right into a lot less complicated to go away a tricky marriage than to be dedicated to doing inspite of it takes to save it at the same time. regrettably, for most it really is no longer entered into as an enduring, lifestyles-lengthy dedication and the outcomes are devastatingly glaring in fashionable society. sturdy question, thanks.

2016-11-03 10:57:47 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

NO in the bible it say that men rule over female . SO you question he should not be a god but he should be a higher authority then you. God bless

2007-02-14 06:39:01 · answer #6 · answered by marlon G 2 · 1 0

Well, I can tell you that your husband is not god. I know this for a fact. Because I am god. There isn't room enough on this planet for two of us!!

2007-02-14 06:39:02 · answer #7 · answered by ? 5 · 2 0

Actually we know were dogs its just that we are also dyslexic. So if you ladies would start calling us God we'd learn soon, well maybe some of us would.

2007-02-14 07:45:03 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2 0

Well men think everything that comes out of where the sun don't shine is gospel, and God you say?......then we women must be Goddesses.

2007-02-15 01:44:21 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1 1

husbands thinks the bible that says obey your husbands meant to beat them god doesn't mean it that way

2007-02-14 06:43:55 · answer #10 · answered by sweetgranny06 7 · 1 0

No...

It's because women think they are always right.

I've seen The Rules.

2007-02-14 06:48:59 · answer #11 · answered by JRSK007 3 · 1 0

fedest.com, questions and answers