I have an online friend. She says she's my age and she live is my town. I never gave her anyother information. We've been talking for 4 weeks and now she's got it in her head that we are meeting at this one restaraunt on Tuesday. I emailed her sayin this-"I am so sorry! Today I got bad news that I'm moving to Miami! I'm sorry!"
Suprisingly she believed it and she replied saying--"This sucks! I can't believe it! I really wanted to meet you at _________."
Just to be safe I said-
"Yeah, and I'm dying my hair brown and getting it cut to my shoulders."
(I just said that because my mom says she wants to go to that restaraunt on my brothers birthday which is on the same day!she already has my description of what Iook like in my profile so just incase she thinks that's me it's really not)She told me she was cryin so I feel kind of guilty But I wanted to be safe.I know it was bad that I met someone I didn't know online! I learned my lesson! But is it ok that I made her upset like that?
2007-02-14 01:59:22 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
I told her I was moving on Sunday
2007-02-14 01:59:45 · update #1
No I didn't tell her my school or anything. She got my description from my profile and my age from there too. I WILL NEVER EVER EVER do this again! I learned a huge lesson!!!!!
2007-02-14 02:08:33 · update #2
Yes, you did the right thing by not meeting her. DO NOT MEET HER. You don't know anything about anyone on the internet. There is nothing online to prevent people from lying about themselves--their age, job, location, anything. You don't even know if this person is a girl. "she" could be a "he" who sends a girl to meet you and then hides in the car or somewhere else. Or it could be a very dangerous girl predator.
You do not want to get involved with online relationships or friendships.
It is good that your family will be at the restaurant, but maybe you could suggest they go somewhere else instead.
Also, for your own safety, you should stop emailing this person, and if you receive any more mail, alert an older relative or a counselor at school so that they can tell you what to do to keep safe.
Luckily you did not tell her where you live. Be careful though, you could have accidentally given her details in your casual conversation that would give her clues, such as where you like to go for fun, where you go to school, church, etc. I would definitely alert some others and don't go anywhere alone.
Don't worry about her feelings. She should be able to make friends offline and she is not your problem. The fact that she got so attached from an online friendship just says something about her is not right. She probably needs help, but that is up to her to get it.
Stay safe!
2007-02-14 02:13:33 · answer #1 · answered by kristin c 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be careful!!!! If you are going to meet with someone, whether you are a minor or an adult it doesn't matter! Make sure you go to a public place where there is plenty of people " AND" make sure you have someone with you (if you are a minor or a woman, try to find an adult guy or guys) or family (father, mother). Never alone and let other people know where you are going and what time you'll be back and have them be prepared to call the police if you do not get back when you said you would.... this is serious. The best thing is don't do it.
2007-02-14 02:16:21 · answer #2 · answered by 235 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that your way of handling this is commendable (you are right to be cautious about who you meet on line) but it is also quite dishonest, so no it's not OK to lie to someone like that.
I get the impression that your parents made the rule that you aren't supposed to meet up with anybody that you meet on line.
I think that you are being very responsible by trying to stick to that rule. So when your on line friend suggested that you meet up, you paniced.
So the question here is, if it weren't for that rule, would you like to meet up with your friend anyway? Or is there another reason why you don't want to take the friendship any further.
It doesn't even have to be a reason that you can explain, just maybe a feeling that you are fine to chat on line with her, but not to get any closer than that. If that is the case then, I suggest that you come clean with her, & share your true feelings about it with her.
Now if you do want to meet up with her in person, then you have a perfect situation where you can be safe, & satisfy your parents wishes as well.
First & foremost, tell your mom what is going on. I don't think you have done anything wrong yet, because you never agreed to meet this person on your own.
Ask your mom if it would be OK if your online friend joined you guys at the restaurant on your brothers birthday so that you can meet her in person.
I think it's great that we can meet new people on the internet, but it has to be under the right circumstances, & done in a way that is smart, & safe for everybody.
I think this is one of those situations. So talk to your mom 1st, & then start being honest with your friend. I am sure that both mom, & friend will understand if you explain it right, & tell the truth. :-)
2007-02-14 02:25:14 · answer #3 · answered by No More 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
"She" could very well be a 47 year old fat dude. I think you made a huge mistake talking to somebody so honestly anyway. i.e. what you look like and where you live. Hopefully you will learn from this and wont end up raped or worse. DONT GIVE OUT PERSONAL INFORMATION TO ANYONE ON LINE!
Think about it, why would another teen cry because she cant meet you?? I think its a guy trying to "meet" you. I think you handled it well but dont do it again! And tell your parents about this so they can start keeping an eye out for strange cars and people walking by your house. Dont think they cant get that info. I bet you even told them what school you go to?
UpDate: Change your profile. If you have a site for your friends to come visit then they already know what you look like. Leaving that info out for strangers is not smart. My children have a my space site as well but it says they are in their fortys. And its set to private so only friends can view it anyway. If you dont know the person from school or church then they are a stranger. Its that simple. We have to be smarter than freaky old dudes that just want to harm us. Everytime you meet someone online think of them as having an unshaven face, fat triple chin, huge beer belly and lice in their hair. If they were as good as they say they are they wouldnt be trying to meet friends online, they'd already have them in real life.
Im glad you didnt tell them what school. I am impressed that you got out of it. Do tell your mom about it though. She doesnt need to be caught off guard. And if youre late coming home from school one day she needs to know where to look. Yes I might be over doing it but then again I might not.
Be smart and be safe.
2007-02-14 02:06:38 · answer #4 · answered by My_Two_Centz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, that was one way of taking care of it, but DO NOT communicate with this person again. Delete all messages from her, ignore anything she says, and if possible, don't use that site anymore. You have no way of knowing for sure that "she" is a "she" and not a "he" who's a lot older than you and wants to hurt you. Don't go back there, it's not worth it.
Next time, DO NOT give out ANY personal info online, I know you know this already, but a description of yourself IS personal info! Be more careful next time, there are bad people out there.
Second, I think you should tell your mom just in case, she needs to know. I know you're probably worried about getting in trouble, but as a mom myself, I would want to know if someone online wanted to meet my kids.
Take care of yourself and good luck.
2007-02-14 02:12:26 · answer #5 · answered by mom of 2 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yea it is ok that her feeling are hurt that you don't want to meet her, you just want to be safe! There are a ton of freaks on the internet and you don't know who you can really trust! Sounds like she probably does not have much friends if she is trying to make friends on the internet with everyone! Don't feel bad you will forget about it, it is not like she was a really close friend or a family member so it will be ok!
2007-02-14 02:06:55 · answer #6 · answered by ~*Sweet Pea*~ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its good that you lied. It is not always good to meet someone from online that you have never met and have been talking to them from online for an limited time. But sometimes people from the online world is real. You just have to be very sure. If you have camera you could see if she would come on. If she says no. She Probably is an online predator
2014-04-12 17:17:35 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You say it was bad meeting someone online, why? i have online friends, they are the best and i try to meet up with them as much as i can but because of distance it isnt always possible but i do meet up with them when i can - as long as you are sensible about it (for instance me and my friends knew eachother online for 8 months before we agreed to meet for the first time and we would be on webcam/microphones all the time so we trusted eachother before a meeting happened) so be sensible about it, if you want to meet then get to know this person first and get to a stage where you can say to anyone who questions it that you know what you are doing and trust this person is really who they say they are.
2007-02-14 02:49:09 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
its true if you make arrangments to meet someone off line then do so in a public place with mutual friends as far as the restaraunt meeting i suggest you sit in the back of the restaraunt not facing the door and then if shew does approach you act as though you have no idea who she is good luck
2007-02-14 02:05:19 · answer #9 · answered by Mark R 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Doesn't sound right. You may have encountered a sexual preditor. Good for you for turning her down to meet her. I just hope that person wether really a girl your age or not believes you are moving.
I hope you really did learn your lesson.
2007-02-14 02:20:51 · answer #10 · answered by Jenny 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋