problem is, I can't get him out of my mind. I feel like I am going crazy. I love my husband, but, I am constantly thinking of my ex-whats wrong with me? What should I do?
2007-02-13 18:05:59 · 20 answers · asked by Christa P 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
The first thing you should do, is realize that you are playing a fantasy game in your head. It feels good to have a crush, and be wanted; but hon, YOU ARE MARRIED. How would you feel if your husband was confused because he talked to his ex.. This CAN ruin your marriage, if you allow yourself to keep fantasizing about Mr. what could have been. The fact is, it didn't happen, and you are happily married. So, now you know you are vunerable in this way, and you need to guard your heart and your marriage; and not talk to your ex anymore since you are unable to control yourself in this area. Maybe your a little bored in your marriage and need to be focusing on how to spice it up, so you dont get lost (and hurt) in a fantasy. Good luck!
2007-02-13 18:17:17 · answer #1 · answered by Erin 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Let's be honest,......if you were "Happily Married" you would not have re-connected with an Old Boyfriend nor' would you constantly be thinking of him.
One can have memories of ex-boyfriends/girlfriends while married, but, to act on them means you might not mean that you are being honest when you say you are happily married.
If you truly love your husband, then say adios to the memory and communication with your old boyfriend. Use discipline and be thankful for what you have and don't alienate your affections away from whom you have sworn to love and made vows to.
The grass may seem greener on the other side, but, apparently the one that earned your love is the one you married. Be thankful for what you have and don't put it (your marriage) in harm's way.
You've now cheated in a slight way, although you may not realize it and admit it. Don't go any further and put your energy and your heart in your marriage before this becomes a major problem.
Enjoy your memory, but, that was then, and this is now. Love the one you're with.
2007-02-13 18:17:55 · answer #2 · answered by The Sylvan Wizard 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
just stop doing what u already know is wrong, why risk a broken marriage, and a broken hearted spouse, u need to control your thought life, if u don't it won't be too long before your in a full blown affair. u can evaluate the pros's and con's of this all u want, and still never really comprehend the harm u are going to cause if u decide to pursue this. be thankful for the good marriage u do have, u don't know what this other person is really like, u may get into a really bad situation here, and maybe u will ruin your marriage if u don't stop the thoughts about this ex.
2007-02-14 00:54:03 · answer #3 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop the emails and phone calls, or whatever else may have been started.
You are olny hurting your marriage.
Even if you 'do' nothing.
Merely thinking about him, and spending time communicating with him takes away from time that should be spent on your marriage. You would be suprised at how easily time lost can take it's toll on a relationship.
Do you want to grow back your old relationship with your boyfriend, OR do you want to grow your marriage?
That's what you need to decide.
2007-02-13 20:25:27 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Reconnecting with an old boyfriend will always bring back old memories, it is natural. Especially if there are unresolved issues, things you always wished you had answers to, or had been able to answer at the time. If this is the case, I think you really need to ask yourself if you should try to resolve those issues, if friendship is a good idea, or if you need to make peace with some stuff that happened.
2007-02-13 18:13:54 · answer #5 · answered by chelles_insanity 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My guess is what's wrong with you is boredom. You need some excitement and romance in your life. Maybe you should try talking to your husband about it. Also, try thinking about what it was that split you and your ex up. How did you "re-connect" with your ex? Did you contact him or did he contact you? That should tell something too.
2007-02-13 18:12:33 · answer #6 · answered by crazywoman88 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes, the pasture looks greener on the other side, but it's not until you cross over that you realize it was your imagination. Other words, you're happily married, stay that way. Leave your ex were he belongs in the past and don't mess up your future.
2007-02-13 18:11:26 · answer #7 · answered by Nikki H 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You know very well that you shouldn't do that since you have your own family now but if you want to re-connect with your ex then I guess you should divorce your husband before you have a new relationship!
2007-02-13 18:12:40 · answer #8 · answered by Cathy 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
THIS IS HARD. BUT IF YOU LOVE YOUR HUSBAND LIKE YOU SAY YOU DO, WHY GO CRAZY FOR AN EX? YOU CAN'T HAVE YOUR PAST IN THE WAY WITH YOUR FUTURE. IF THAT IS WHAT YOU REALLY WANT? PUT YOUR FEELINGS TOGETHER THEN FIGURE IT OUT.
2007-02-13 18:18:48 · answer #9 · answered by florecitarivera 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop all communication with the ex b/f. If you want to remain happily married, this will not be a problem for you to do that.
2007-02-13 18:09:41 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋