Female dealing with fears in frienships with other women.?

Question

I feel very comfortable in friendships with men, however I am always striken with anxiety that I am not acceptable or liked by women. I find that I am affraid to be myself and feel rejected by them.

Any simlar accounts and viable solutions that have worked for other women?

Additionally, I am fit, clean, happy, outgoing in all other areas of my life.

Answer 1

I couldn't relate to you more, but I really don't know how to go about it either. I can tell you that, at least in my experience, talking openly with women about the problem does not seem to work (maybe it's just the women I've befriended). Women over-think, it seems, which tends to make them more judgmental. With guys, you can do or say just about anything and they will enjoy you for who you are. I really think it's because guys are more confident about their identities and their worth and don't need to compete with other women. Women feel threatened by each other because they identify with each other's insecurities. They always feel like the other is sizing them up because they themselves are not confident enough in themselves and feel the need to defend who they are (and sometimes they are not quite sure who they are). I think women have it so rough in society. I think there must be a few women out there who are confident enough or even insecure but open enough to befriend other women honestly, but I haven't found many. You just have to get to know a lot of women and try to be as confident and trusting as possible. If you trust her, maybe she will relax and trust you. But you really have to make each other feel safe, I believe, or you will constantly be competing or hurting each other. I don't compete, but I find others seem to want to. I just hope we both find the friends we are looking for. Female friendship can really be a beautiful thing, but it's just so hard to find. Good luck :]

Answer 2

I'm not so much concerned that they won't like me, as that they can't be trusted...but either way, start off small. Join a group or something and slowly add more females to your social circle. Besides, if they reject you, it's probably for the best: no sense hanging around people that don't like you or will treat you like you're second class.

Answer 3

You have a very low "self"-esteem problem going on. Your letting what others (those being female others) might think of you play heavy on your mental state so when your actually around other females this is what your projecting to them and they could be taking it as your snobbish or stuck on yourself (vain) or even a tid-mouse (to quiet). My oldest daughter had a big problem in school with having female friends (had tons of male friends) and she was heart broken because she could never figure out what she was doing to females that put them off...she came to understand that her problem was within herself, she wanted so bad to be excepted by others that she withdrew inside herself not letting the real person come out when in female company. With boys it just came natural, being herself, she wasn't trying to impress any of them with her dress, hair, make-up or any of the things girls all go giggly over.
Just step back in yourself when your around guys and see what it is that is making you comfortable with them and use the same technique on the females and see what happens