I am really relieved that he is gone. He was a abusive drunk who was never to blame. Anything that happened was always someone else fault. The day before he moved out he went to jail because he was screaming and getting in my mothers face, so she called the cops. He pulled out the phone cord and he was charged with interfering w/ police call. Class A misterminor. Will he get in a lot of trouble for that like jail time. I don't know why I care I've lived in this enviroment for 4 years. His brother called me and said my mother was wrong for what she did. I told him he didn't know what my husband was like most of the time. Please respond if anyone has been in this position and felt guilty or still wanted to protect someone from themselfs.Thanks
2007-02-13 07:50:54 · 8 answers · asked by BABY GIRL 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Hey There,
First and far most your mother did the best thing for him,Maybe now he can get the help that he needs...As far as you feeling guilty that will pass with time..Please what ever you do DO NOT KEEP YOUR FEELING IN SIDE IT WILL ONLY EAT AT YOU and that is NOT GOOD..His brother should really mind his own BUSINESS.. If he feels that why then he should let his brother move in with him and he will see first hand what he is like..If I were you I would start getting a divorce and moving on with your life I know it is easier said then done..You should attend a few of the AAA classes it just may help you understand why you feel the way you do..You will see that AAA is not just for drunks but can help you get through this..I would not talk to him or take any phone calls from him or his family members the reason I say this is because they will try and make you feel like $hit..You do not deserve to be batted around as well as putting you and your mother down...If you just need to talk or a sounding board PLEASE e-mail me I will listen and be here for you. GOOD LUCK TO YOU PLEASE REMEMBER YOU ARE NOT ALONE IN THIS!!!! You have people who will help you by lending an ear or shoulder or just be a sounding board for you...
2007-02-13 08:31:16 · answer #1 · answered by charmed4412 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
My Ex was also a drunk as well as a cheater. When I left him I too felt a tinge of guilt because I knew he would not take care of himself properly. The only thing he could/would cook was canned soup and popcorn. Holidays were the worse to think about, his own family didn't really give a darn whether he was alone or not. I held it all in though because I knew deep in my heart that he had done this all to himself and never cared how I would feel and little by little the guilt diminished.
2007-02-13 08:01:27 · answer #2 · answered by sassywv 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all you might feel guilty because you know that you still love him. He might mean a lot to you. YOU know that it wasn't right of how he treated your mom. He has to learn on how to respect your parents.... other than that if you really love this guy then you should have a serious talk with him. But its like that saying goes if there is love; then there is hope and faith because they are all connected. So that might me something you might want to reflect on TODAY. If you still love him; you know the rest of the story right? For example, my sister who is involved with a guy that is a drinker... they have a little angel together but they are not living together for that reason. Though that does not mean she gave up yet. She has faith and hope that he will change...By the way she has been fighting for his change already for a year. And honestly I have seen some change in him. See it is up to you if you want to fight for him but you have to have patience and he owes an apology to your mom.... Hang in there!!! you'll make it.....
2007-02-13 08:47:52 · answer #3 · answered by Brenda 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
this is a violent man and you should be relieved that he is gone. If anyone got in my mothers face I'd be the one in jail... this guy is bad news he will any cause you heartache and harm. Don't take any calls from his family they just want to harass you...sounds like his brother is just as bad if he's trying to justify what your husband did..stay away from his family and don't trust anything they have to say. get an attorney asap and tell him/her everything
2007-02-13 08:04:40 · answer #4 · answered by Hi its me again 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You've been emotionally and possibly even physically abused by this drunk (using your words). You need counseling to see that none of this is your fault, and you do not have to protect your husband. Call your local AlAnon chapter, and they can tell you when they have support groups and put you in touch with a counselor who can help you. Good luck!
Don't let him move back in when he tries to either, ok?
2007-02-13 08:10:16 · answer #5 · answered by basketcase88 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
The reason you feel guilty is because this man has emotionally abused and manipulated you. Eventually you will heal and when you look back, you will be so happy that you got out of the situation. You should give your mother a hug.
2007-02-13 07:56:07 · answer #6 · answered by starrjellie 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Stop worrying about him. He's a grown man that got himself into this mess and he can get himself out of it. Tell his brother to go screw himself, he has no clue.
2007-02-13 08:05:28 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
You need to see a counselor, therapist or what ever. But get HELP!
2007-02-13 07:58:09 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋