Me and my sisters boyfriend did it this morning, what should i do now?

Question

my sisters boyfriend stayed over from last friday and at first things were cool,,he knows i'm gay and he was staying here with me at my place till they get there new place together. we hung out all weekend and really honest to god nothing happened and i didn't flirt or hit on him or nothing,,we slept in 2 different rooms,,but i only have one bathroom,,we were getting ready for work,,and i came out the shower and he was going in,,we bumbed into each other said sorry then,he grabed my hand and i pushed him away and then i throw in on the floor and we started kissing and then it happened,,what should i do now,,tell my sister or just let it go?

to all the rude peeps who have nothing better to say then something stupid,,F U. but to the ones who really care about others thank you for talking the time out,,and yes i am HIV neg,,and he used a condom

Answer 1

Okay, enough with the beating yourself up about it by listening to the people on here crap all over you. You made a mistake. Not a good one, but everyone makes mistakes. The important thing is you're concerned about how to best remedy the situation.

First of all, I think you have to tell her. However, I would suggest first approaching the bf and telling him that it's not fair to your sister that he's obviously probably not completely upfront about who he really is, and that you intend to tell her one way or another, but that you would like for all of you to sit down together and talk it all out. That way you're giving him a chance to come clean and allow everyone to air out everything from all angles, so there's no "he said she said" stuff going on.

If he resists and advises you that he will deny it, you're in a little bit more of a pickle, as your sister would be placed in a situation of who to believe. Hopefully if it comes down to that, you're on strong enough terms with your sister that she will believe you in spite of his claims that you're lying.

This doesn't get you around the fact that she's gonna be mad at you either way, but there's no way to avoid that. You just gotta deal with it, expect her to be really pissed, and impress upon her how sincerely sorry you are about it all.

You could argue in your defense that at least now she has information that she probably wouldn't otherwise have known, but you kinda have to softpedal that a bit because you're going to be taking a beating and you need to show contrition and accept a large part of it.

Now if it's the case that your sister already knew and accepted that her bf was bi, oh boy. Then it's gonna be weird and really she should be mostly pissed at him, but still you're gonna get it bad too.

Good luck.

Answer 2

Wow. OK, first of all, as your sister's brother, you should have never let this sort of thing happen. But things can happen that you often regret, so I guess the thing to do now is to tell your sister. She deserves to know for two reasons. 1) She should know her boyfriend goes both ways if she doesn't already 2) She deserves to know he cheated on her. The sad thing is that the two people involved are both people who she felt she could trust, so she's going to take it really hard, but she deserves to know. Do the right thing.
Actually, I'm not sure if the news should come from you or the boyfriend. That's quite the tricky situation. Good luck.

Answer 3

Tell ur sister. U don't want ur sister dating sum guy she thinks is straight. I could not imagine her disgust. The fact that U did that behind ur sister's back is creepy. Why would u disrespect ur flesh and blood like that? U definitely have sum spiritual growth to work on.I have nothing against anyone's sexual preference, yet morals have to play a role somewhere. SEX isn't all there is to life. There are more important things such as WAR, Disease, Starvation, Nature, etc. Don't lose your sister over some random incident that apparently was just about physical pleasure. U must come clean to her before she finds out some other way. It is better to just be honest starting today>+

Answer 4

Assuming this story is true, you both knew this would happen sooner or later, and your sister may have sensed it as well. Talk to her boyfriend first about whether or not to tell her - and perhaps he did already.
If he didn't tell her, and doesn't want to, then you both have to decide whether you can keep screwing each other without her knowing it. And if you do keep doing it, she and he will drift apart anyway.
The thing is to not make her feel bad about either herself or you.
Things happen, and sometimes they SHOULD be kept secret.

In an ideal situation, you could all live together and she would accept his bisexuality and keep it in the family. But nobody I know is that enlightened.

Answer 5

Oh boy...toughy, it will come out sooner or later, especially if you and the guy are uncomfortable with each other now and your sister picks up on it.

Only you know your sisters personality and her level of tolerance...either you can take your chances, stay quiet and hope all works out to your advantage so she isn't hurt somewhere down the road, or you can spill it out and get the masacre over with...sorry, but if it were me, knowing me, I'd have a huge mouth and be unable to keep it from my sister...I'd rather she kill me sooner than later...would hate to be living a good life and suddenly have her come along and tell me she hates me for the rest of my life..but that's just me.

Do what you feel is best. I know, big help!

Answer 6

Reminds me of the safe sex saying that you're sleeping with everyone your partner has slept with. Now you've effectively slept with your sister, as far as that is concerned.

I'd tell you to tell your sister but you obviously don't give a **** about her if you are messing with her boyfriend, so nobody really cares what you do.

If you were a real man (gay or not) you'd have beaten the **** out of her boyfriend for trying to cheat on her, even if it was you.

Answer 7

Why is it like the movie which is coming out soon --> Gray something. Well, you should asked that guy, if he is just curious or serious, cuz you don't want your sister to end up with a gay. Unless he is BI and your sister is fine, but i will definetely talk with your sister

Answer 8

Your going to have to tell her.

1. She may not know he's bisexual.

2. She needs to know he cheated on her (with you).

3. She needs to be tested. If he was with you that quickly, how many other quickies did ne have that she did not know about. You may be negative now, but what if his last partner (a week before) tested positive.

4. He many have used protection with you because your her brother). He may not use them all the time.

Answer 9

Well, obviously you shouldn't have done it in the first place, because it's your sister's boyfriend, but its done and that's not what you asked about. You should definitely tell her, secrets like that are poison. The truth is always the best way for so many reasons. It's not necessarily the easiest way, but its always the simplest, and simple is good.

Answer 10

That was horrible! I don't wanna be rude or anything, but c'mon man, it was your sis' bf...what were you thinking? You should've stoped him! You gotta tell your sister, be a man and now confront the consecuenses. He should't be with her. And one thing is that he's bi, and maybe he wanted to experimento or whatever, but with his sister's brother??? He's freaking out of his mind, and then in the house we're you welcomed him to stay, as a family member...he should be honest with your sis, tell him that he's bi, and you...well, if I were your sister I would be mad as hell.

good luck and don't play like that, you're the rude one here...