Am I obsessed?

Question

Am I crazy? Why do I obsses over some peoples death. to the point that I can't sleep. I change every channel to see if I can get some news. It all started with Robert Kennedy, Nataly woods, Prinses Di, Nicole Simpson, Laci Piterson, and now Anna Nicol

Answer 1

Robert Kennedy, Natalie Woods, and Princess Diana were icons in the world. Robert Kennedy was the hope of many Americans for a better government at a time of division in the land. His brother had already been assassinated and I believe his death ended the rest of a special kind of hope that the assassination of President Kennedy started the end of.

Natalie Woods was so talented and beautiful and her death seemed so needless, caused by being drunk and falling off a boat--a senseless and needless tragedy. She and Robert Wagner seemed like the American dream couple.

Princess Diana was like the last fairy tale princess. Her death .
was a great disillusionment for many of us on a deep, deep level. By the way, I spent a week watching the telly, attending a memorial service for her given by the consul-general in Kobe,
Japan, and grieving with others of the commonwealth.

I have wondered why her death hit me so hard, as you wonder about some of these other people--but I believe she had made herself beloved of many, and yet her private/public life was such a huge public tragedy--the kind that is disillusioning about the possibility of "living happily ever after". If even the great, the powerful, the royal, who represent to the people, in a way, the highest that can be in terms of living life can end so sordidly,
then there is no one left to hang our dreams of beauty and love on.

On these three I can comment in a way that may help you. Because their deaths represented, if you like, parables and possibilities, dreams and endeavour that was destroyed certain kinds of faith in certain things that all of us hold valuable.

Nicole Simpson, Laci Peterson, and Anna Nicole, are harder for me to address in any way that I feel can be helpful to you. Nicole was the victim of abuse, Laci Petersen of a perverse husband, and I have always wondered why Anna Nicole was even a celebrity. Perhaps if she had not been she would still be alive.

I think you need to identify what it is about these latter deaths that trouble you, as they are in a sense, ordinary deaths--not nice ones, nor proper ones, but the kind of deaths that many people suffer.

In identifying the cause of your obsession with each death, you might find the cure. I, and many around the world, shared your obsession with Princess Diana's death. We watched as the news and events and funeral unfolded and took place. And her death hit so many so hard. I mourned and cried through it all, harder than I could imagine I would have. My feelings seemed excessive to me at the time, and yet natural. But I think that all of us were mourning more than her death--but something fundamental about human hope. And at the end, I could put it away and get on with life. But her death changed something in our generation as the lives she touched (as the consul-general said) remained changed for good.

If you can't work it out yourself, it might help to talk it out with someone--a counselor of some sort.

But I think, when you know why these deaths affect you so, you will be able to overcome your 'obsession'. I think maybe one of the important factors in this, is after you have gone through these experiences are you able to let them go--or do they affect other parts of your life in an unwholesome way.

Is there something in a past relationship or a present one that causes you displace feelings you haven't recognized or dealt with on to these people?

I hope you can find a solution to your problem. I don't think it's helpful to wonder if you're crazy. Each of the deaths you named have had time between them, so it seems that it is only certain kinds of deaths or the deaths of certain people that affect you this way. If you obsessed over everyone's death all the time, you'd need some serious help, but it seems to me that bringing out the reasons into the open with the help of someone would be a good start to allaying your fears and your 'obsession'.

Maggie

Answer 2

Well part of it is the media, when someone big dies its all they talk about. Every news channel is covering it and its all you hear about. So its hard to not think about it! Also i think its the shock of it. These people we see everywhere. They are alive one moment and the next they are gone! Just like that! Makes you realize how fragile life is.

Answer 3

If I were Claude, I would be concerned. Yes, I would say you should get some help.

Answer 4

Not obsessed... Just a bit strange.

You're okay as long as you don't start killing people to keep your numbers up...