i have a friend who has just told me she thinks she's pregnant. She just turned 19 but is still a senior in high school. She wants to keep it a secret from her parents but I think she should tell someone, for the sake of the baby. What do i do?
2007-02-13 04:38:50 · 10 answers · asked by n.t. 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Hi net.pmats...,
Your friend is in a rock and a hard spot. Most of the advice you have recieved so far is very good. How ever I would not recomend ignoring your friend for a few weeks to see what happends. I am a father of 3 and my oldest is almost 14. Not that I ever want to hear that any of my 3 girls are pregnate before getting married. But I would want to know if they were. God forbid she has a miscarraige, she is going to need all of the emotional support from everyone to include her parents. At 19 she is not legally bound to tell them, but they are going to find out one way or the other. She doen't want to tell them because she is scared. It may be of help for her to have you there when she tells them. If I was in her shoes I would be affraid of what my parents are going to think and would want a freinds support when I told them if I did not feel comfortable by her own.
You may even want to carefully talk to her about putting the baby up for adoption. Abortion is not the answer; I have met and talked with many women how have done this and have deep emotional scars from doing so. Adoption for her baby, if that is an option would be a good way to give her baby a better life and when she is ready to be part of its life she can be there. Other wise she is going to strugle in many ways in her life. It's the worst way to start her life as a single mom. And to get married just because she is pregnate is not the answer either. Doing that will set her up for a life of disappointment and struggle.
I hope this has been helpful to you.
2007-02-13 05:03:53 · answer #1 · answered by Buster 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She should tell the whole wide world! Details, particularly who is the co-creator of the new member of the human race. Nothing will go away. Everything will come out, no pun intended, one way or another, and it'll be a lot easier for her and the child if she starts early and often to get the financial assistance she'll need for pre-natal care, perhaps housing, even a college fund for the baby. If she's not sure who the not-so-proud papa is, she should simply name all the candidates and let the court sort 'em out. And what should you? Just continue to be her best friend and give her all the love and support you can. Don't be judgmental and don't get in the way of her decision,
2007-02-13 04:55:08 · answer #2 · answered by goolsby39 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let her handle it for a couple of weeks and see what happens. If, after a couple of weeks she is still of the same mind of not telling someone and seeking help you tell her that you are going to notify her parents. If She is not taking care of herself and has not seen a doctor, or is thinking of an abortion, then go ahead and tell her parents. The baby needs to be protected. Be sure you let her know what you will do if she does not tell someone and if she does not take care of herself and her baby.. Good Luck
2007-02-13 04:46:39 · answer #3 · answered by Mari-Mari 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Like everyone has said, take a pregnancy test. If she is pregnant then she should tell her parents as soon as possible. They're going to find out sooner or later so she might as well tell them as soon as possible. It might make them more angry knowing that she kept it a secret from them for quite some time.
2007-02-13 04:49:47 · answer #4 · answered by ih8u 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She would only be able to hide it from her parents for so long, unless she moves out. She should tell them. Or tell a responsible adult she trusts. Her doctor would be a good place to start. Doc wouldn't be able to tell her parents and might be able to tell her of some good places where she can get prenatal care if she doesn't have insurance. She needs to find out if she is really pregnant and if she is then she needs to take care of herself and her baby. Stress to her that she needs to tell someone that can help---trying to hide it and not getting proper care can harm herself and her baby. If she's scared to tell someone, then you should offer to be there with her for moral support.
2007-02-13 05:33:02 · answer #5 · answered by Danielle 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LEarn a lesson from her and don't get pregnant while in high school or even before you'r married.
And she really should tell her parents. But she is of the age of majority so she is not compelled to.
2007-02-13 04:48:48 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should get her a pregnancy test and support her while she takes it. That's your first step right there. She has to be certain one way or another.
If she is pregnant, sit down somewhere and discuss all her options with her. If she's not, head to your local parent planhood center and get information on protection.
2007-02-13 04:47:14 · answer #7 · answered by cloclo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you friend talk to her parents. She needs to tell them that she might be. First, she should take a pregnancy test to see if she is for sure.
2007-02-13 04:44:50 · answer #8 · answered by Case 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i dont think hiding it from her parents is a good idea, she need to let them know and the sooner the better. if you wait until its too late it will be definately be more complicated
2007-02-13 05:29:43 · answer #9 · answered by DI'MARIO 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your best friend needs to understand she needs to tell her parents.Or this lie will get bigger.
And your your friend`s stomach.
she`ll thank you.
if not she does not respect your guidence.
tell!
2007-02-13 05:09:04 · answer #10 · answered by Chocolate for The Soul 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋