2007-02-13 00:33:47 · 25 answers · asked by youchoose1 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I apologize in advance as this probably isn't what you want to hear, but.
Ask her how she would feel if it happened the other way around? Would she think you were just friends with a girl you had an affair with on her? I guarantee the answer is no, she wouldn't want you anywhere near that girl. If she says otherwise then she is a lire on top of a cheater and the odds say that she is still cheating on you with him if she continues to see him against your wishes after that and she obviously doesn't care about your relationship if she is flaunting her infidelity in that way.
2007-02-13 00:52:48 · answer #1 · answered by jeff s 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would tell her she needs to choose. Her friendship with Mr. affair or your marriage. It may sound harsh. But it's that simple. She isn't being fair to you and she knows it. She needs to quit playing games with your marriage. I would not tolerate that and I don't think it's fair for her to ask you to tolerate it. I am certain she wouldn't like it if the shoe was on the other foot. She knows it's wrong. The guy she is talking to knows it's wrong. You deserve time to heal and her talking to him doesn't help you to move forward from her cheating. I would legally separate from her until she gets her head right. Don't threaten it. Just get a lawyer and do it. I think for some people it's the only way to get through to them. Get the support of a trained professional for both of you as you go through this process. They can help you make sure you both understand all of the emotions involved in her choices and behavior. Good luck.
2007-02-13 08:43:15 · answer #2 · answered by amanda_momof3 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all why are you still married to her.Once a cheat alway's a cheat.You should have more respect for yourself and want better for yourself you deserve to be treated with dignity & respect.Your wife has no business talking to some man that she had an affair with and was unfaithful to you.I would get a divorce immediately and move on and I can almost guarantee your wife will be back with this man..If she is'nt already..Good Luck to you.
2007-02-13 08:53:21 · answer #3 · answered by Maureen B 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It's hard to hear, but it seems she just doesn't care about how you feel. If she did, she certainly would not be even talking to him. If she loved you, why would she put this on your mind?
No, she's being highly selfish, and chances are, you're going to get hit from her with some kind of head game, she'll rationalize it. Hell, she already has by saying they're just talking.
If you want her, put an end to what is going on. NOW.
If you don't, then you better plan and plan well for a split.
If you share any credit cards, get your name off them.
2007-02-13 08:42:44 · answer #4 · answered by Jed 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is no different then a man stating he is "just friends" with a girl, 9 times out of 10 you know that is a crock of bull. She doesn't need contact with this man if there is nothing there. She is disrespecting you the marriage and everything you have worked for.
2007-02-13 08:45:07 · answer #5 · answered by swtlilblonde31 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would nicely tell her that if she is going to talk to him she could tell him that things are over with the two of them. If she really loves you she will be willing to try to make you feel as comfortable as possible with the situation. She has no reason to continue talking to him especially after he is the one that she lost your trust in her to. It is possible that there is no sex involved, but you will always have suspision that they are soing more. Don't let her drag you down and feel that way. That is no way to want to live your life with her. I think if you sit her down and express you feelings to her she will either respect the way that you feel or not. If she doesn't then I would feel that sex is still involved
2007-02-13 08:43:17 · answer #6 · answered by Jessi 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you still love this woman you need to demand that she stop this asap. Do not let her walk all over you like this. If its over then there should be absolutely no contact with this person whatsoever. You are being made a fool of. Tell her stop or get out. DO not tolerate this or you'll be sorry!!!!!
2007-02-13 09:59:45 · answer #7 · answered by jjeano661 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Really a difficult situation. You need to be cool headed now. What she says might be true too. You cannot end up losing her upon suspecting.
The best way is to first confirm how deep is their relationship first. Then it is wise to decide on your next steps. If she is really a slut then you can stay away from her.
Always, "You can possess anyone through your love and affection", show your love more that what you show now to your wife and make her realize your importance. She will be yours. All the best
2007-02-13 08:43:32 · answer #8 · answered by Irismar 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Tell her that this is unacceptable and you want it to stop. If she doesn't stop you are going to have to decide how much longer you want to be humiliated by this woman who obviously has emotionally disconnected from the marriage. Look into counseling to find out why she feels she still needs to talk to this man.
2007-02-13 08:39:12 · answer #9 · answered by Lisa D 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
take a stand and mean it.
be ready to walk out on her or throw her *** out if she will not respect the perfectly reasonable boundary of not contacting the person she was cheating on you with.
the hard part is to mean it though. Unless she believes (and unless you believe) you are really ready to give it up for good if she does not comply then she has no reason to modify her behavior.
2007-02-13 16:19:18 · answer #10 · answered by jude D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋