My girlfriend might be pegnant what should I do?

Question

Me and my girlfriend use condoms and she is on birth control. but latly she been having stumic cramps and she was suppose to start her period 2 days ago. she called me this morning and told me that she really think that she is pregnant. I'm going to take her to the clinic to get tested today, but how can we find a job and keep it a secret from her parents? because if her step parents find out that she is pregnant she will be kicked out of the house. What can we do.

Please no comments like absanence is the key or yall should of spred her legs.

please note she is only 17 and living with her step mom and her new boyfriend. and my family is not a very good one.

I'm 19 in college, I stand by my girlfriend and any mistake that we have made, its legal in north carolina for us to have sex. and abortion is just plain wrong and adoption is compleatly out of the question Its my baby and it always will be mine no one elses.

Answer 1

You both shouldn't make a big deal before you find out for sure if she is pregnant or not. She has had to skip a couple of pills hasn't she for this to possibly happen?
Maybe she needs a different kind of birth control method.

Answer 2

I am not sure where you are from, but if you find out that she is pregnant today, are you willing to do what it takes to make this work out? If so, there are many things you can do. Start looking for a job. Is she still in school? Have her talk to the school counseller. Do you have a local health unit? Go there and start up paperwork on assistant for the baby. Apply for medicaid for medical coverage for Mom and baby. Is there someone your gf can confide in? When will she turn 18? If she can not tell her parents.. then she will have to try her best to hide it. You both will have alot to do in a short amount of time. Are you 18? If so, the parents could file charges against you.. you really need to make sure that she pregnant 1st, before things get out of hand for no reason. Then take each step one at a time. Will your parents help you out? Think like you have nobody in the whole and you will make this work.. Good luck.

Answer 3

not a good idea to try and hide it at all. Her parents will find out sooner or later and its best if she just comes forward and tells them that she has been on birth control but ended up pregnant.

Theres no need to tell them until after you find out for sure.
chances of her being pregnant are very slim but its still a possibility. So just have her take a test. You both need to stop thinking about how to hide it and take responsibilty for your actions and just fess up. If she gets kicked out then she can call around and apply for housing. You should find a job so you can start saving up your money because a baby costs more then you could ever imagine.

Theres other things besides keeping the baby and you both need to sit down and discus them if she is pregnant. She could have an abortion or she could give the baby up for adoption. There is an open adoption where you can still have some contact with the baby and the family that adopts the baby.
--good luck i hope shes not pregnant you guys arnt ready for a baby.

Answer 4

Okay, like the answers above, check out if she really is pregnant. First of all, I'm not judging you at all, so please don't take it that way, I disagree with what you were doing, but that's in the past and it can't be changed. In the mean time, you obviously don't think much of your family. The first option I see is to somehow move out of your house, get an apartment and marry the girl and find a good job, if you can. That might not be an option. You could somehow keep your girlfriend with you for a while and when she has the baby, you could put it up for adoption. If your girlfriend doesn't like you anymore, then tough, she needs to stay with you if you're the father, and she needs to not be with her new boyfriend. Abortion isn't an option, becuase first I don't believe it is right, and second, it was your responsibility not to get her pregnant, so you shouldn't take your own mistake out on your child. That may sound very rude, but I'm not meaning it to be rude, I'm being honest. The final option is to tell her parents, let her be kicked out, you both get jobs, or one of you try to go to community college. You've got to bring things together, don't let your girlfriend be alone in this situation. It's a tough situation, but you've got to figure it out. In the end, it's you and your girlfriend's responsibility to bring a child into the world, and it sounds like you care, so I think you can do it, just don't give up hope. If you have to, find a church, a good one! They will help you with the child, they will probably give you some job, they might help feed you, and you can find hope, faith, and love there. Don't give up. God bless!

Answer 5

If you honestly used condoms and she is on the birth control pill (which she has taken correctly) then the chances of her being pregnant are very, very slim. I'd say get her tested right away so you can both ease your minds.

If it turns out she is pregnant and the contraception you both used failed, then please speak to a family planning counselor that are available through local clinics. They can advise you on your options. If she is underage and her parents kick her out, she could receive aid from the state...the medical card, food stamps etc. to help you both through this rough time. You will definitely have to find some sort of job...something is better than nothing.

But, try and wait until she is tested because condoms together with the birth control pill make pregnancy unlikely unless you've misused both in some way. Periods are late all the time...some people never have a regular period. Some women get their period every 28 days, other every 40....there are a lot of different cycles a woman can have. Good luck.

Answer 6

As soon as she turns 18, get married and live together. I live in NC and I got married at 16, but my mom had to sign a paper. Get a job and find a place and she will need a job to, but when she turns 18 she can leave and nothing can be done to her. You can also talk to a lawyer and see what you guys can do until then. I am 14 weeks and people cant tell unless they know. Hopefully she can hide it until she is 18 thought. But both of you get a job and save up money so when her 18th birthday comes, yall can split. But ya know, you guys parents might take it better than you think. Good luck and I hope all works out well for you two.

Answer 7

Pregnancy can happen even with all of the birth control in the world. And even good young Christian couples who thought they were practicing abstinence were surprised when they became parents (so no, I won't be preaching abstinance-only either).

And like someone wrote earlier, it could be something else is going on that is unrelated to pregnancy...wait and see before you panic.

Having said that....

While 17 is young, it isn't THAT young. She should be legally and adult by the time the baby arrives. But you two are still the ones who have to go to bed with yourselves at night.

If you are scared of raising a baby, but are morally opposed to abortion, remember there is a third choice that I think not enough young women are considering today. Adoption. Yes, I know...we see on the talk shows, "I was a adopted...waaah. I want my real mommy." Trust me, these are the MINORITY. I know because you are reading something written by a child of adoption. I know that my natural parents loved me enough to give me a better life than they could provide, and that my mom and dad (the ones who raised me) loved me enough to come looking for me. To be honest, it was actually a self-esteem booster to me as a kid...I had two sets of parents who loved me. My parents picked me while everyone elses parents were stuck with what they got. To this day (and I'm in my upper 30's), I still don't know who my natural family is, and it doesn't affect me one way or the other.

And to top that off, some adoptions are quite a bit looser today, where the adoptive family sends photos and letters to the natural parents.

But whatever your outcome is, and whatever your choices be, I give you the best of my hope that life turns out okay.

Answer 8

Stomach cramps are a sign that she may be getting her period and it is not that unusual to be 2 days late. She may just be freaking out. Go to the clinic get tested and if she is not on the pill she should talk to someone at the clinic about getting on it - if she is she should ask them questions about how to take it etc
If she is pregnant you are going to have to tell her family. She will need prenatal care and babies are very expensive. If she intends on keeping/raising the baby she will need to prepare, set up a nursery, etc and it sounds like you will need help. Her parents have to take care for her till she turns 18 by law and cannot throw her up w/out repurcussions. You should also consider adoption if you cant afford to raise the baby or abortion if thats something you two would want to do.

Answer 9

She could be pregnant.
Don't stress until you find out for sure.
If you were using both forms of birth control correctly then the chances of her being pregnant is extremely thin,
you guys may be stressing and over-reacting. Buy a pregnancy test at the drug store. She just has to pee on the stick for like five seconds, then you'll know within two or three minutes.
Go buy the test, ease your mind.

If she does turn out to be pregnant, buy Materna(it's a prenatal vitamin for...well, pregnany women.) She needs to take one a day, every day. These have vitamins and minerals that her body needs plus it had folic acid which is proven to help prevent serious birth defects like spina bifida in your baby.

Answer 10

She can probably move out and get on government support. I used to live in North carolina and I beleive it is possible.
Get a job so that maybe ya'll can help each other and let her know you support her and this baby 100% and tell her it may not be planned but it is not a mistake the last thing you should do is call you baby a mistake.