i am thinking of going into a relationship,with a man that has some months old son,how do i go about?make myself free with the boy and maybe get to love him like my own.can i get a good chance here,sincerely,cos i generally love kids,but to make this one my own?
2007-02-12 21:46:39 · 6 answers · asked by bamboke 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
Honestly, I am a step-mom. I never had children of my own until after I married my husband. I LOVE my step~son as my OWN! and he was five whenwe got married. I amsure that being thier while the child is so young could only be an advantage to you. It is not fair to turn down love because of a child. If the guy is a GREAT guy, give him a chance! I almost passed up my man, bc he had a son. I am soooo glad I didn't, he is trully my knight in shining armor. I will warn you that IF you do get hooked up with this guy and IF you do get married, there WILL be fight over this issue. But, If you really love the man and the child it is all worth it in the end. You sound like a real level headed woman, the choice is only yours to make. I say go for it!
Good Luck!
2007-02-13 14:08:30 · answer #1 · answered by Thia K 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a really hard situation. You don't want to bond with the child and have the child become attached to you and things don't work out. This kills children. They are always getting hurt. You sound like someone that does not want the child getting hurt. Being in a relationship with someone that has a child is hard. If the mother is around you will hear her say so a lot. Which also makes it hard. Try not to get to close until you find out if this will last ot not. Good Luck
2007-02-13 08:10:52 · answer #2 · answered by Danie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't get close the the baby untill you know for sure that the relationship is going somewhere. You don't want to get really close to the child and then you two don't stay together or work out and then you will be crushed about the baby. Especially if the baby gets close to you. Still see the baby and play with him and everything just try not to bond! It will be hard though because you love kids. Good luck!
2007-02-13 05:52:27 · answer #3 · answered by Jen 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
One the child can never be your own , I am sure he or she has a mother, good or bad it is still Mommy. you have to make yourself happy in the relationship first or you will be unable to make any involved happy, spend time with Him ,and the child,and let the bond develop with time to build trust between your man ,and the baby ..your man may get suspicious if you come on too close to the child so quickly..
Be very careful the momma cat gets very defensive and angry when another cat gets near or close to the kitten if you know what I mean.....it could start a cat fight
2007-02-13 05:56:21 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
sure you can, anyone can get themself pregnant without a care in the world, but it takes someone to be a "mum" to that child. Its not about the maternal blood relation, its about being there for that child through thick and thin and if you love this man, i say go for it x
2007-02-13 05:51:33 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The big secret is not to try too hard, give the child space and time to adjust to this change
2007-02-13 05:50:34 · answer #6 · answered by Shelty K 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋