A year back my Wife, then single had a six month sexual affair with her married neighbor that they kept secrete. Last week she marked her calendar to wish him for his Birthday. She then told me first thing in the morning that she forgot send him B'day card but is going to give him a call to wish him.
Do you think this is normal or I am being a jealous husband?
2007-02-12 21:41:41 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You married quick, if she was sleeping with her neighbour just a year ago, how long had you know her before marrying? She may just have stayed friends with him, at least she told you about it all instead of hiding it, that 'sort of shows' that she has nothing to hide, give her the benefit of the doubt. Yes, Its normal to be jealous when your wife is thinking of another man. He is married as you said, what type of woman sleeps with her next door neighbours husband? Not a very nice woman thats for sure....
2007-02-12 22:46:56 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is quite possible she felt it would just be a nice thing to do. But, on the other hand she showed no consideration for how it might affect you.
Tell her you were uncomfortable with her actions and preferred she not have any contact with ex'es, any ex'es.
If she get upset, that is, overly so, I fear you may well be facing a big problem. Such a reaction probably indicates she is not over this guy.
A good solid marriage is based upon mutual respect and treating your mate with selflessness.
It is sort of like the old saying, "Treat your wife like a queen and she will treat you like a king." But has to go both ways.
The other side of the coin is to give each other a little space. Don't try to control her every move.
It is not easy. keeping the marriage strong.
I wish you both all the best.
2007-02-12 21:59:52 · answer #2 · answered by Stan M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Keep on the no-contact plan. She trashed you, man. She could have taken the excessive-road out of respect on your 22 yr marriage and ended it before cheating on you. You want treatment to get over the betrayal as well as feelings that this girl does not deserve. By way of all approach you should be civil for the sake of the kids, but she would not deserve a card from you or good-wishes on her birthday. I understand it's rough, but are attempting to not let the children be aware of that you simply still have emotions for her. In light of what she did it'll make you appear susceptible. Discover a powerful male therapist to help you regain your manhood. Final silent on her birthday is not being a jerk. Carrying a torch for a girl who torched you, is.
2016-08-10 15:52:20 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask her how love, honor, and respect for you plays in to calling her ex lover. I know my wife would put me in the dog house if I called the girl I was having sex with before we met. Why would your wife want to maintain a relationship with this person? No, you are not being jealous. A birthday card is like a gift. I have received emails from ex lovers and promptly asked to be taken off their address book out of respect for my wife.
2007-02-12 22:00:29 · answer #4 · answered by The Central Scrutinizer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It may not be that big of a deal, but does sound a little inconsiderate. I doubt she is still having the affair or she wouldnt have his birthday on the calendar in your plain sight. I'd tell her your uncomfortable and ask her to leave it alone.
2007-02-12 22:13:34 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hell no your not being jealous. Does she know that your kinda jealous? She could be pushing your buttons? I reckon you should hang off on saying anything but keep an eye on her ie perfume for no reason, showering during the day etc etc. Its 100% legal to setup security cameras in your own home - think of it like an investment. Ifs she playing funny buggers with you - youve got evidence to make sure she gets nothin.
2007-02-12 21:49:29 · answer #6 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
keep on the no-contact plan. She trashed you, guy. She might want to have taken the extreme-street out of appreciate on your 22 year marriage and ended it previously dishonest on you. you want remedy to recuperate from the betrayal besides as emotions that this lady doesn't deserve. by potential of all potential you may want to be civil for the sake of the children, yet she doesn't deserve a card from you or properly-desires on her birthday. i understand this is troublesome, yet try no longer to allow the children do not forget that you nevertheless have emotions for her. In mild of what she did it will make you look weak. hit upon a sturdy male therapist that could want to be sensible you regain your manhood. last silent on her birthday isn't being a jerk. carrying a torch for a lady who torched you, is.
2016-10-17 06:51:32 · answer #7 · answered by svendsen 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i sure would not like it, she needs to be told it is either him or you, a gal or guy should not play that game, and to me it does not sound like a game but she does not want to let him go, put the foot down now, and tell her how you feel and if she really loves and cares for you she will loose that number, and not call him at all, if it had been my girlfriend, i would have told her right then, do not wait and let it happen again or go any furture, tell her how you feel and it bothers you way to much for her to evan be calling her old flame, it has to be you or him, and be right out with it, or it may never end evan if you marry her she may think it is ok to call him anytime or evan worse send him gifts on his birthday and christmas, she does not want to let him go or she would not be calling him at all, but one thing i have to say at least she did not hide it from you, but it still should not be happening,mk,
2007-02-12 21:56:44 · answer #8 · answered by mdwright48 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ummm bro y would she wish secret love afair hbday i mean are u crazy hell no ur not perinodyed hell im saprised ur still with her first chect u tll them one more chance n lose contact with that person 2nd cheat or continu to see ythat person then they dont care so u leave em dont stay with sone one that has had a afair n then continu to see that person ther is a sxual atratction more likly n **** is gana happen watch out n hope the best bro
2007-02-12 21:48:52 · answer #9 · answered by chris_anime_fan 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hello? Are you that gullible? She probably never stopped sleeping with him or stopped fantasizing about it. Why would you ask if it would be alright? Of course not. You better tell her who her man is and let her know what's up. This is not normal and your not being jealous. I would look more into what she does when your not around.
2007-02-12 21:49:38 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋