Somehow I gradually grew into this situation without being aware of it. I went from different study programs, living in dormitories and with roommates for half of my life. Now I realize that I am 34 years old, orphaned, estranged from the rest of my family, single, a foreigner and living alone, with no friends. I lost my gf/best friend due to my carelessness. I can't go back to my home country and don't know how to go forward. What would you do ?
2007-02-12 15:17:35 · 9 answers · asked by tenno1234 4 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Wow man.This sounds sad.I feel for you.For real.
I find that having a job helps me socialize.
Go to the gym.
Go to some activities that involve other people.
This is going to take some time.Keep your head up.
2007-02-12 15:22:58 · answer #1 · answered by Matty G 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What to do?? That all depends on the way things were left? I might try and contact an old friend, i am sure that would want to talk or hear from someone that was gone for along time, but one word of advice, dont expect them to be the way they were.. I found that out... I had a similar experience, it is never the same. I would try and make new friends call a physcologist and join a singles club. There is a SinglesOnes club. This is one club for meeting friends,business contacts, and romantic ones. Maybe meet someone for lunch.. U would be surprised how many people might be in that same situation.... School, moving , traveling, busy with the busy life, I have been there. Best of luck, try joining a Fitness club, thats what i did.
Hopless to hope
2007-02-12 15:28:08 · answer #2 · answered by So annomus 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First you need to get OFF the computer and get out into the world where you can meet actual human beings face to face .
You can send a letter of apology to your former friend explaining that even if you can not reconcile your friendship, you want her to know how sorry you are for your part in the demise of your friendship.
Now, figure out what brings you JOY, and see if there are any classes about that at your local city college or groups you can join to meet people that are also into what you enjoy.
And you should see if you can get your hands on a copy of the movie The Secret- preferably the original version with Esther Hicks. It will change your life. I am not kidding.
If you can't find the movie, go to a bookstore and get a copy of Esther Hicks' book, The Law Of Attraction. READ IT.
No one is actually "alone" in the world. You can chose to isolate yourself for whatever penance you are giving yourself, but remember IT IS YOUR CHOICE to isolate yourself. There are 6 billion plus people on the planet. Unless you are living in the middle of the wilderness, you are NOT alone.
BIG difference between ALONE and LONELY. And again, it is YOUR CHOICE to isolate yourself.
Go find a good therapist and do some real work on YOU. You will be ready to re-enter the world of people with vision for tomorrow.
2007-02-12 15:29:34 · answer #3 · answered by Mimi Di 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was kind of in the same situation you are in now, not too long ago. The fact that I was alone with no one to turn to made me go into a depression stage and i found that talking to a professional really helped me. I woud recommend it. In the mean time though, learn to love yourself, be your own best friend. Going to the gym helped me alot, meet some nice people, and got me into shape. Also it can take up a large portion of your day when you might feel bored and the loneliest. And once you start to feel better about yourself and start to believe in yourself, people will be able to sence this and they will come to you. "head up" is what i always told myself. it doesnt hurt to say a prayer either.
Oh and , forget that broad you were talkin about. shes gone. you dont owe her an apology or anything for that matter. GONE.
2007-02-12 15:38:00 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would do exactly what I did!! I looked in that big blue sky and the thought that there was no God was the Final Blow!! I'll always remember crying myself sick on that stupid scratchy sofa. Now I am older and realize how sad that would truly be, had it been true. Sorry. Had to tell you what came to me. It wasn't overnight, but it happened. @8-) Good Luck Honey. Try to hang on to some Hope. And take good care of whatever you are able to now. There's a force that cares and it flows through us all. I will sign off so I can lift you up, or at least Try. I have to TRY. You rest.
I'm going there right now. Good night.
2007-02-12 15:24:19 · answer #5 · answered by Dovey 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Other than being a foreigner, I'm in the same situation. I read a lot, and build things out of wood. Having a job is a good way to meet people.
2007-02-12 15:21:45 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all become your own friend. I realize this sounds psychotic but it is very important to understand yourself before you expect others to. From there I would get out and be friendly. You are going to have to start talking to people and going out on a limb and the difficulty of this is going to vary on the size of your town. I would suggest bars, resturants, and coffee shops to clubs where the main goal is to hook up for the night.
2007-02-12 15:23:59 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Chant theHare Krishna Maha Mantra(the great mantra for deliverance from all suffering and illusion> No one is really alone. Krishna is in every living entities heart. You just have to contact Him through the mantra which are His names. got ot harekrishnatemple.c Read Bhagavad Gita as it is By Bhaktivedanta Prabhupada. This will help you understand your purpose in life and you will never have to feel alone again when you get in touch.
2007-02-12 15:27:03 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you say what would you do... i guess id get sik of just living dy to day with no direction.
probably you just need to find some kind of occupation/hobby/vocation that makes you feel accomplished.
2007-02-12 15:57:05 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋