I Mentor a boy (heas a young teen) and his Mom is dating a new boyfriend. She had only known him for about 2 weeks and had him "sleepover" (several times) at their house while my mentee and his little sister was home. This isn't the first guys to walk through the door. I obiously think she is a little easy (cleaned that up for you) . I also don't think this is a good thing for the kids (especially for her daughter), but is there anything I can do? (probably not). I'm pretty sure it bothers the kids because my mentee seems more agitated when a new boyfriend arrives on the scene. Any suggestions or comments?
2007-02-12 13:34:38 · 11 answers · asked by benjamin p 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
It is none of your business, unless someone dies and you get the tap to be Morality Police. You could tell your boy to have a word with his mom about not dragging him through her adult drama.
2007-02-12 13:38:26 · answer #1 · answered by justbeingher 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This a tough one. First and foremost try to make the kids feel at ease with the situation. I know that may be hard to do but if you can find a way it would be good. As for the mother...there isn't much you can do unless you can prove that the children are being mistreated in some way because of this but if you try this tread carefully. If you turn the mother against you then she will not let you mentor her son. Keep your eyes open for any neglect or abuse and report any but do it anonymously in case the authorities do nothing about it, you still have not jeopardized your relationship with the boy. After all you may be and probably are the only stable person in his life. Be sure he always feels safe and cared about when in your presence.
2007-02-12 21:55:04 · answer #2 · answered by babysnake2007 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's not a lot you can do it's the mom's decision to live that way, what you can do is encourage the young man that the way his mom is acting is not the way an adult should act, also if you can make sure the younger sister also knows this...the only real way you can do anything is if the kids are in danger and by the mom just having a man sleep over isn't danger. It's obvious the mom is only thinking about herself, if you push the situation you may lose the job of mentoring this young man and he probably really needs that.
2007-02-12 22:27:21 · answer #3 · answered by Kitikat 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
A frequent change of male "father-figures" in a child's life is damaging. For a young girl, it can reduce her self-worth and for a young boy it can ruin the way he views women. There isn't really anything you can do to improve their home situation but if you can get them both outside of the home and try to show them what a proper adult relationship is like it can really help. It might be worth it to talk to the mother about what she is doing to her children but she may then refuse you visitation with her child.
2007-02-12 21:40:01 · answer #4 · answered by PUtuba7 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is she being neglectful to her kids?...is she absuing them in any way, shape or form?..If so..you could call child and family services to hve them check it out.
If she is not tho..really..there is not alot you can..or should do if the kids are taken care of by her. Are you there all the time, so you know what is happenuing all the time?..or are you assuming things?..
You seem to care for the kids, that shows..but it is hard to say about the mom, becasue we have no idea how she is as a mom to her kids. her sex life is no ones buisness..not even yours.
If she is taking care of her kids..and loving them as a mom should, the rest is not anyones buisness.
2007-02-12 21:42:56 · answer #5 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds a mess your right to be concerned but either you tell her, tell the authorities or say nothing, depends if the children are being neglected or put at risk I guess. What you have to decide is whether those children would be better off in care, if yes then blab away! If no, then shut up, be around for her and offer to babysit asap
2007-02-12 21:38:20 · answer #6 · answered by rose_merrick 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
yeah, my comment is that you mind your own business. unless you are a parent in her situation, you have no idea what it's like to raise children on your own. and how dare you even comment on this women's sexual life! you have no idea what they are doing. dating people is not a crime.
2007-02-12 21:40:55 · answer #7 · answered by redpeach_mi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
child services NOW....tell them what goes on and let the authorities take care of it. These kids need help, more help than a mentor (applause for you) can provide..
Thank you for caring and good luck !!!
2007-02-12 21:39:18 · answer #8 · answered by Chrys 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
She should get a babysitter
2007-02-12 21:38:08 · answer #9 · answered by cop350zx 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell on that person.
2007-02-12 21:36:53 · answer #10 · answered by YuLin M 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋