Do you value your wedding vows???

Question

It doesn't seem like there are too many people left who actually values their vows. They say "for better and FOR WORSE" so why do so many people ask questions on here like if they should try to make their marriage work if they are having hard times or problems?

Do you value your vows?

If you were having intimacy problems or communication problems or if one of ou cheated one time or something like that would you just call it a loss and get a divorce?
Or would you try to work at your marriage and make it better?

I mean I don't think I could ever leave my husband unless he beat me or something that was threating my life or my childrens lives.

Answer 1

I have for 13 1/2 years and will continue to honor mine...

I think many people don't realize that a commitment requires some sacrifice such as "forsaking all others". I think that some merely repeat the words and don't realize the meaning of their vows. I believe that self-absorption is the biggest reason for divorce.

It takes work, patience, respect, trust, and a lack of selfishness to really make a good marriage.

Answer 2

Yes, I value my wedding vows. I grew up being taught that make sure the one you marry is the right one, because marriage is supposed to be forever. It's not a casual pair of aquaintances like a lot of people make it out to be. If you don't value your vows, then your marriage isn't worth the paper it is written on.

Cheating hurts, and I think that communications problems and intimacy problems are the bulk of problems in a relationship. You can usually tell when there is a communication problem by LACK of intimacy. It is always the first thing to go, even if you don't know why. In the end though, I would be devoted to my mate. I think that it would take some professional counseling, but when it all comes down to it, marriages are all about love, trust and compromise. The no fault divorce is one of the worst things I think this society has ever come up with.

Answer 3

You just said it: "I mean I don't think I could ever leave my husband unless he beat me or something that was threating my life or my childrens lives." Doesn't what you said fall under the category of For Worse? So you also place conditions of breaking your vows.

I have been married for 20+ years and not divorced. People change and couples do not necessarily change together even under the best of conditions. Here in America, we have a culture of challenging old traditions, go for quick fixes and instant gratification so we are innovators in many good and bad things, including bringing the darkest side of marriages to the public.

One can ask the same question billions of times, there is no clear answer. I have my own shortcomings so I see no point to put myself on a high horse and preach.

Answer 4

there's no right or wrong answer, really, because there are so many different reasons people split up. I was with my ex for over 11yrs.
We were happy the first few years and when we began having problems, I told him so. It fell on deaf ears.
I tried to change my attitude, perhaps it was me?
I let it go for awhile, but it didn't get better and I told him so. Told him I wasn't happy and told him why. He tried--briefly--but it all went back to the same old stuff.
I told him AGAIN, no change.
I told him I wanted a divorce, he actually did change--for awhile. And I let it go again.
That was it, I was done. I didn't leave right away, I planned my leaving, so that I would be prepared to support myself and my children, if need be.
And I left a functional alcoholic that worked too much. A man that I was never in love with, we didn't even sleep in the same bed any longer--I couldnt stand him touching me.
He didn't realize what he had until I was gone. But I told him--over and over again. He didn't listen.
I have found true happiness with a man that I am deeply in love with that listens to me and we WORK things out--for better or worse.

Answer 5

I honored my vows, but my ex-husband didn't think it was necessary to honor his. It does take both people to honor the vows to make the marriage work. I personally do not believe that anyone should stay in an adulterous marriage if the spouse committing the adultery won't seek help, counseling or stop cheating. No one deserves to be in that kind of marriage. It isn't enough for just one of the partners to keep theirs.

Answer 6

I do. I think promises are very important and reflect the integrity of your being. I think that you should know going in that in any relationship you will be hurt and it will be very hard sometimes. But a promise should mean something. I think there are a handful of reasons to get a divorce. I think that abuse and adultry are reasons. I think that in cases of cheating that you should try to work it out, unless it is a consistent problem. I suppose no one lives up to their vows perfectly. To perfectly love is beyond human capacity sometimes. But I believe you should give it the best you got.

Answer 7

I took a vow before God when I got married and I take that very seriously - as does my husband. We have been married for 12+ years and have had our share of problems but divorce is not an option!!

Answer 8

Wedding vows is for two people in one.
No matter how much you value it, if you're
in your own, then vows is just a word ,
not an action..
Wedding vows is sacred . It should be valued
and respected.. It's just sad that values of it
is fading, and fading fast.
Now it's just like clothes that people often change.

Answer 9

I truly value my vows. However, it takes two people to make a marriage work. If one half of the pair does not care, does not make an effort, then it won't work.

Answer 10

Marriage vows are what two people involved need to take
the responsibility in keeping them, it's very easy as when
both people involved in the marriage are committed to
each other and when problems arise they talk about it
togeather and resolve it togeather they keep going on in
their marriage. Believe me it works and going on 20yrs
this feb14 we both have done this without having had to
cheat on one another.