My and my ex girlfriend split up last month but still live together.The other night we had sex for the first time since,i know she still loves me but im not in love with her anymore.As i was feeling rather randy all day,and i trusted her sexual,we ended up in bed.We both agreed that things would not change and it was just a bit of fun.But today she's gone all weird saying i used her for sex,when we both agreed to do it.Have i used her for sex or not ?
2007-02-12 11:44:26 · 32 answers · asked by half pint 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
YES I AM A LESBIAN
2007-02-12 11:49:37 · update #1
No, because both of you agreed on it
2007-02-12 11:48:58 · answer #1 · answered by b_angel07 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
If you two communicated before having sex and determined that it was just a physical thing, that both of you wanted it, and that this did not mean that you two were rekindling things, then no you most certainly did not use her for sex.
Mutual sex for nothing more than physical pleasure is just fine as long as both parties are in agreement. It sounds like she was in agreement last night but then changed her mind this morning.
Now, you probably should have had more self-restraint since you know that she still has feelings for you. Her having feelings for you makes it a lot harder to have sex with no strings attached. So even if she said yes she was fine with it, it probably wasn't a good idea for you to believe her.
So you didn't use her for sex, but you probably should have thought twice about doing it.
2007-02-12 12:04:15 · answer #2 · answered by Jen 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you both agreed, then she is just having some issues dealing with it the day after. Maybe she agreed to non-committal ex-sex with the hopes of winning you back, and now that you are true to your word of the other night, she is retaliating. Who knows, but as far as I am concerned, you only kinda used her. You did make sure she knew it was a sex not love thing, but didn't some little part of you know it would be harder for her (you admit you know she still cares for you) than for you?
2007-02-12 11:55:33 · answer #3 · answered by I Can Preach Too! 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you *both agreed* before hopping into bed that it was just a casual thing that night, then she has no right to complain. It sounds like you used her for sex and she used sex to try to get you to go out with her again. Now she's complaining because her plan failed.
2007-02-12 11:48:23 · answer #4 · answered by carora13 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
YES you did use her. even though she told you that everything was going to be the same isn't true cause she still has feelings for you. and why would you sleep with her if you knew that?! That's not right. So yes you did use her.
2007-02-12 11:50:37 · answer #5 · answered by jj 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It really sounds like you did use her. You already knew her feelings for you and knew that she was hopeful to get the relationship back and you just wanted sex.
2007-02-12 11:49:16 · answer #6 · answered by kramerfam2000 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As long as you both agreed that things would not change then no, you didn't use her for sex.
2007-02-13 01:03:49 · answer #7 · answered by Scully 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you knew she still loves you then, yes you used her. As long as she loves you she will sleep with you and feel bad about it. Move out and let her be.
2007-02-12 11:52:14 · answer #8 · answered by Sam B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You just said she too agreed so where does the "using" come into play here.
2007-02-12 14:49:08 · answer #9 · answered by nickle 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Join the mens club. We have been putting up with this crap for years! No, you didn't use her, she just doesn't want to handle the guilt the right way, so she blames you. Sometimes, they just act like you OWE THEM!
2007-02-13 04:58:31 · answer #10 · answered by sowhat 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋