How to work on trust in marriage, when you've been honest all along?

Question

I feel like my wife doesn't trust me yet I've never lied or done a major wrong in our 5 yr relationship. She asks me so many questions then challenges me if a response doesn't mesh 100% (like I'm being cross-examined) or accuses me of misleading her or "lies of omission" or lying and I have to go to lengths to prove otherwise. Sometimes I don't say something on my mind because I don't want to hurt her feelings, and I just safely/quietly let it go. I had a major life decision to make recently & we both agreed I needed to leave for a day to think about it solo, and when I left out some of the details in my decision process she accused me of a lie of omission. It goes on & on, basically feel like I'm guilty until proven innocent & it gets tiring. How do I work on building trust? If I shared details of every business or 3rd party personal conversation with her, I'd be blabbing 12 hrs a day & never get a thing done. And for a guy I do think I communicate.

Answer 1

Wow I see my ex wife all over again here. I am truly sorry dude,. You are my hero to endure like you have. My cyber hat off to you.

Now what I haven't read in your question is... Any counselling or therapy or couples focus groups and or reading self help books to one another. Is that because these faucets of marital mental health not included? And if it has been included can I assume its failing miserably?

So far my ex wife was diagnosed with extreme bouts of paranoia and depression and jealousy and major self esteem issues.

Does your woman work? if not, perhaps it might give her something more than worrying about what your doing 24/7

Answer 2

You don't have anything to work on. You are doing everything right. She needs counseling to help her figure out why she can't trust you. Likely she was seriously betrayed in life before you and you are suffering the consquences.

Answer 3

Sounds like she has some past issues that need to be worked out.