I have a great friend. Whenever we're together, and ESPECIALLY when we are hanging out with other peope, he's always cracking jokes about me being gay. Like if we are playing pool, he's obviously gonna refer to the pool stick as a you-know-what, saying I like the pool stick. Things like that. Well...he's does this excessively. What can this signify?
2007-02-12 06:44:29 · 16 answers · asked by Ben D 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
From the information you give, the only SURE thing is that this behaviour springs from some sort of insecurity on the part of your friend. This type of thing is pretty common among kids and teens. Just look at schoolyard behaviour. Why do kids pick on others? Almost everyone who regularly makes jokes or comments at the expense of others does so in an effort to fit in or be percieved as cool. This fits perfectly with the way he acts "especially" when you are around other people.
So, exactly what is he tying to prove? That, you will only find out by talking to him about the situation. Possible scenarios: He may have become aware of some internal feelings of attraction to another guy and is very uncomfortable. Could be a tiny attraction that means nothing, could be more. There's no way for us to know. Maybe someone else made a comment to him about being friends with you. You didn't say in your post if you are or aren't gay, just that he made jokes about it. If you are gay and out about it, someone's comment could make him wonder if others perceive him as gay because of your friendship and his bad jokes are a way of showing that he's not.
Anyway, it signifies some insecurity and only a direct conversation with him will tell where it comes from. You say he's a great friend so good luck. Hope you can talk it out and solve the issue to remain friends.
2007-02-12 08:53:47 · answer #1 · answered by Faron3 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It could signify that he is LGBT and wants to know if you are interested.
It could signify that he is bigoted against LGBT people and thinks you share the same hatred.
It could signify that he has a poor sense of humor and tells unoriginal jokes.
Until you discuss how such "jokes" make you feel, and ask him why he makes such jokes, anything is just a guess or an assumption.
2007-02-12 06:49:16 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
While he may be trying to send a message to others he is not gay, it may also mean that he is trying to find out if you are gay for sure. He may also be trying to feel you out on how you feel about him and may be subtly wanting to hint he is interested in you that way. A lot of times, those that speak out the loudest in public are those who are the most insecure themselves. I think you need to tell him it bothers you when he does it and ask him why he does it as well. You may get an enlightening answer.
2007-02-12 06:55:37 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-12-04 02:22:27 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you being gay makes him question his own sexuality?And by cracking jokes makes him feel more masculine,or maybe he just wants to make sure the other people around you guys know that he's not gay also,b/c you guys are friends.Either way he needs to grow up!!
2007-02-12 06:49:21 · answer #5 · answered by molliehollie 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like a homophobe to me. People who exhibit this type of behavior towards you do not have your best interests at heart. He is making fun of you and you are taking it. It is quite possible that he himself may be gay and is in denial, lots of people do this. If he is not gay than it is very likely that he doesn't like gay people. He could be a danger to you later on, it seems best to avoid this person.
2007-02-12 06:56:13 · answer #6 · answered by rchl782 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he is being like this as a way of showing intrest in you or gay men.Maybe you should confront him about how he makes you feel.If he refuses to listen then cut all ties with him,you don't deserve to be treated like that.
2007-02-12 07:15:24 · answer #7 · answered by half pint 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it indicates that your 'great friend' is not your friend at all. He is ridiculing you. Why would you want to hang out with someone like that?
Regardless of your sexual proclivities, he is rude and crude. Dump him.
2007-02-12 06:49:38 · answer #8 · answered by Rani 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That he has to tell his friends that he's not gay. Making fun of you shows his friends that he doesn't agree with gayness and isn't a part of gayness.
2007-02-12 06:47:39 · answer #9 · answered by Scary Monster 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would tell him to cut it out. There is no reason to have to put up with this. If he doesn't cool his jets. I'd tell him to hit the road. Your dignity is worth more than having to put up with off color remarks regardless who they come from.
2007-02-12 06:48:28 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋