I got pregnant and married (in that order)at 16...it didn't work out. My daughters father hasn't been the best father or helped me alot financially or any other way, and as much as I love her, it's been a real struggle, he's recently had another child and is getting married. He's told my daughter that she will be a flower girl and gets to miss a day of school which is fine and normal, but I'm not welcome?!? I don't get on with him much but I try, and I get on with his new fiancee...I know it's wierd for an ex to attend weddings and stuff but it's the first time she's gonna be a flower girl and I'm gonna miss out and feel so secluded. It just doesn't seem fair that I have to get up at the crack of dawn, get her washed and fed, get her to school, go to work, come back , pick her up, cook, feed her, wash and clean, take her to swimming, gymnastics, piano (all which I work hard to pay for) etc. I do everything on my own and always have but now that means nothing. How do I accept al this???
2007-02-12 06:40:34 · 4 answers · asked by ✩☆✩HAPPINESS✩☆✩ 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I know that this is life and it's unfair, but I just want some suggestions on how to get my head around it all???
2007-02-12 07:41:16 · update #1
If I were you, I would leave it alone, just ask your selfish ex to please give you a picture of you daugther in her beautiful bridemaids gown.
Wow, he was such an as crack you want to make sure he is out of your life, you want to make sure he is somebody else problem, lol. By watching in walk down the aisle, lol (JOKE)
Seriouly, I understand what you talking about, you want to see your baby walk as a bridesman but for what ever reason he does not want you to be there, maybe he is scared that you will meet and get cool with someone on her (HIS NEW WIFE) side a friend or family and in time spill the beans about how much of a dead beat and as hole he is but it is not like this girl won't find out later on anyway. he clearly doesn't want you there. In a few years you will have a wedding. =) If you didn't marry over already.
2007-02-12 08:45:18 · answer #1 · answered by seeking 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Life isn't fair. I'm sorry but there's no other way of looking at it. You really don't want to go to your ex's wedding, do you? It'll just make you feel like crap for all the things you don't have: how dare he get to go be happy while you have to handle everything on your own, and "she" gets to have a husband and child and marriage when it should rightfully be yours, right?
Now to say what you do means nothing is just silly- you know that's not true at all, but you're just feeling kind of sorry for yourself right now. What you do means everything. Watching her be a flower girl at your ex's wedding is soooo not important when you figure in you watching her at piano, gymnastics, swimming and being there every day. HE's the one missing out.
2007-02-12 14:53:24 · answer #2 · answered by Violet Pearl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You get up at the crack of dawn, get your child washed, fed , dressed for school, go to work, take her to her activities and then feed her again and put her to bed! These are all things that you as her mother should do. Why do you want to attend your ex's wedding so badly. When my ex got married, I wasn't invited, our son was and he was best man. I didn't want to go and didn't even think about him getting married for the entire day. What are you going to miss out on? Seeing your daughter dressed up for being a flower girl, is her fathers privilege since its his wedding. Let it go and you will be happier. Sounds to me like you have a few resentment issues.
2007-02-12 14:50:37 · answer #3 · answered by Premo Mom 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ask your husband once again if you can attend the ceremony only, not the reception after. If that doesn't work, please keep in mind that this is a special day for your daughter and you must do your best not to ruin it for her.
2007-02-12 15:06:41 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋