Question about a friend.?

Question

I have a friend who I love alot. The problem is, when him and I are fine relationship wise, we have a GREAT time together. But there are moments when he has these mood swings, like I did something wrong, but I don't see anything that I've done wrong. And if I ask what's wrong he'll be like "nothing". But I sense it cause of his facial expression, and how he gets quiet all of a sudden. How can I confront this?

Answer 1

Don't try to confront him. You will make the problem worse.

Silence can be a form of control, (used by men who don't want to be violent). If it continues or becomes worse it can be a form of abuse.

Answer 2

I have a friend who sounds like yours. Every time she is in a bad mood or looks particularly sad (usually she is a cheerful person) I'll ask her "Is something wrong?" or "Is something upsetting you?" and she'll shrug me off or ignore my question. Trust me, it's not you that your friend is angry with. Some people find it harder to talk about emotions than others. Perhaps your friend has been told by someone indirectly (perhaps a parent or someone) that his emotions are invalid. Make sure you let your friend know that it's okay to be upset and that you have no problem being open with him. Share your own emotions with him and he may eventually do the same with you. Sometimes it is best just not to keep on at a person who doesn't feel comfortable talking about their issues. After all, sharing is their choice. On the other hand, if you suspect he may really be going through a hard time or that he needs your support, be direct when addressing his mood swings - "What are you angry about?" "Can I do anything to help?"

Answer 3

If I were you, the next time it happens I'd tell him how it makes me feel. Like,
"I'm concerned that you're reacting to something I've done. I'd like to stop doing it, if that's the case. When you won't tell me what's wrong, I feel angry [or whatever you feel] because it seems you don't trust me enough to talk about it."
If he says it's not you, or says nothing:
"If it hasn't got anything to do with me, and you don't want to communicate, that's fine, then **don't communicate** about it -- spare me the pouting and silent treatment."