I once was involved with this man years ago, we broke up then later on we hooked back up while he was married, things between us started to get steamy. He wanted to persue his carrer in the ministry, what him and I started to do every night was a sin( now keep in mind he is still legaly married). I have even had keys to his house for a short time. I love him so much that I just left really without saying anything because I didn't want to hurt him and I wanted to see him happy in the church, even if that meant without me. These years has went by without me seeing or talking to him, and about a week ago I found him on line. Check thid out he's divorced from his first wife and now remarried. I didn't leave for him to have found a different person I just thought that maybe by him going to church that he and his first wife might have stayed together, but I was wrong. I can't stop thinking about this man, even though I am in a relationship now, I want him back, I truly love this man.HELP ME
2007-02-12 05:47:31 · 13 answers · asked by meme32 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If you love THIS man you have described, then you have very low standards. You love an adulterer and a hypocrite. Additionally, the fact that you can possess such strong feelings for this guy while in a relationship with another man proves that you should not be in your current relationship -- it's not fair to the man you are with. I think you could use a very long course of therapy focusing on examining how you came to believe that you deserve such a horrible man. I get the sense that you do not feel worthy of genuine love.
2007-02-12 05:59:47 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to start focusing on the here and now, instead of what happened in the past. You may have felt something for this man then - but ask yourself, did he really love you? Or was he just looking for something exciting or new?
You need to focus on the relationship you have now - and what you are doing to maintain that. If you are thinking about this man right now, it means that you are not really commited to your new partner. Is that fair to him or to you? Concentrate on the present and let the past be the past. The final choice you did back then was the right one - that he needed to be with his family and focus on his job and his love for his wife. Ironic that he is a minister. Leave it at that and move on.
2007-02-12 13:59:14 · answer #2 · answered by noncrazed 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are a fool! not only is this man a lyer he is a lyer to the highest, there is no room for him in your life or Gods service he should be exposed and let his ways take him down the path of losing as he has proved he is only worthy of. Now he's on line looking for more nookie because the woman he finally did leave his wife for still doesn't give him his needs. He should leave the ministry and hire you to make porno movies.
2007-02-12 14:00:47 · answer #3 · answered by Arthur Richards of Kent 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We have all had to walk away from people that we really loved because they were not worth it. Everything about this guy is telling you he is not worthy of your time and can't be trusted. His lack of integrity in his faith is the first indication of a big problem.
Women with self-image issues always fall prey to men like this. In fact men like this guy seek out weak women because no other emotionally healthy lady would waste her time.
This is also telling where you are emotionally. You need to find more respect within you and just walk away and welcome a healthier relationship in your life. The hurt will go away in time.
Look up the definition of co-dependency and you will learn what is behind your attraction with this man.
2007-02-12 14:20:13 · answer #4 · answered by T-Rex 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not going to judge you because I've made plenty of mistakes also. But quit living in the past & get counseling. Whatever you do, if you really love him, stay away.
2007-02-12 14:38:32 · answer #5 · answered by jimmyjohn 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He was only using you for sex.
Get over it and move on.
Obviously, he doesn't respect a woman who was willing to sleep with a married man. He would never trust nor respect you.
2007-02-12 13:50:54 · answer #6 · answered by FERNANDO 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are both going straight to hell. It bothers me that his career is in the church - I expect more from these people that make a living preaching to others about right and wrong. Shame on you.
2007-02-12 13:52:48 · answer #7 · answered by Bondgirl 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Leave him alone.
Pay attention to your current relationship.
I have little else to say to you. I don't think you're a very good person.
2007-02-12 14:03:22 · answer #8 · answered by fucose_man 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get over it and move on with your life. You are portraying him as your perfect match but I don't think he is. Unless you are looking for someone who would be willing to fool around on you, because as sure as he would fool around with you he will fool around on you when you are married to him.
2007-02-12 13:57:15 · answer #9 · answered by J J 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's remarried yes it's too late! Go get counceling.
2007-02-12 13:52:02 · answer #10 · answered by swtlilblonde31 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋