My husband is 16 years my senior - and we have met some people that find it strange that such an age difference wouldn't hidder us. (I'm in my thirties, he's in his forties).
I'm curious how many women are out there with an significantly older husband/boyfriend (more then 5 years her senior) and your thoughts about age differences. What attracted you to your partner? Was it his age and that he was older and seemed more mature? Or were you attracted before the two of you ever realized there was such a gap?
2007-02-12 05:41:59 · 16 answers · asked by noncrazed 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I just want to make clear here - my husband and I are very happy. I am not worried about age differences. I haven't met a lot of people who have that same age difference, and wanted to hear some stories from those that have the same situation.
"11 years older then the woman is safe, but pass that many yearsis thin ice"
I'll have to tell my husband this - we're on thin ice. I like how 11 is the magic number - Please.
2007-02-12 05:52:10 · update #1
I’m sorry about that, some people are just too quick to judge.
Age has nothing to do with love.
Don’t listen to those people who find it “strange” to be with someone who’s a lot younger or older than you are. Although it might be a little difficult because of the age difference and level of maturity, but that’s life. In any relationship, there’s always going to be a problem.
As long as YOU are happy with this man, why do you care about what others think? They’re probably not getting the love that you’re getting from their men. I’ve always preferred someone who’s a lot older than me because I love the maturity, tenderness, kindness, and sweetness from them.
Everybody is different, so what ever works for you and makes you happy. Defend your husband from those people who finds it “strange” that he’s a lot older than you are; tell them that you have never been HAPPY in your entire life…Be proud of him because he deserve it, don’t you think? Life is too short to worry about this people..... enjoy your life with your hubby.... !!!
2007-02-12 05:55:48 · answer #1 · answered by L!LO 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I started to like the older man when my second husband failed me, who is a year younger then me. And my first husband who is 3yrs. older then me. I notice sense I started dating I really like the older man. They are more mature, I notice that they had more patience with me, and they are good lovers. In they know how to handle a women inside or outside the bed. In there more responsible then a man my age or younger. In a older man been there, done that. As a younger man or a man my age there still try en to find out whats out there. My boyfriend now less in 5yrs from now he will turn 60. And he don't look it at all. When I meet him I knew he was older but I didn't have a clue how older he was just on his looks alone. He don't even have winkles.I haven't hit my forties, and I got a few winkles already, he don't. And before him I was dating a man who was my age, and I hated it, he just wasn't filling my needs, his maturing level was not there for me, of course I broke it off with him. And now that I found my new boyfriend now of 5months I love it. I didn't realized there was such a age gap just on his looks, until he told me My mouth hit the the floor because he looks good, in dressing well. I was attracted to him before I knew his age, but I knew he was older I just didn't know how much. I think there's nothing wrong with someone being 5 yrs there senior or 10 or 16 or 20 yrs. If your both want to same in can react with each other there's nothing wrong with it.
2007-02-12 14:32:42 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm 27 and my boyfriend is 39. I don't think I even realized he was that much older at first. My ex-boyfriend was 24 and very immature to begin with. I was tired doing all the work to keep us afloat. When I met my current boyfriend, we're going on 1 1/2 yrs now, it was so pleasant to be actually taken out to dinner or to see him take care of his own bills. I appreciate and find it attractive that he is an established man. The only thing that I don't like is that statistically speaking- women live longer than men and I don't want to outlive the one I love for so many years, know what I mean? As far as other people's opinion of us- well we don't get that much- I think because of where we live. this island has a lot of people who moved here and start anew- no family no old highschool buddies, etc. so people really make friends out of all ages. I have friends of ALL ages. Just on Sat. we were at a beach birthday party for one of our friends turing 19 and there were plenty of people over the age of 50 and younger than 13.
2007-02-12 14:12:47 · answer #3 · answered by Erin M 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I have a number of friends where there is a significant age difference. They seem to be much happier than the friends I have that are close to the same age.
Since men mature more slowly than women it may be an advantage.
It's really not so much about the age... it's the maturity level of both people and whether they are marrying the person they need - and not what they want.
I think the concern people have is for later in life where one spouse will be taking care of a much more senior spouse. That can be troubling times for the younger spouse.
2007-02-12 15:23:39 · answer #4 · answered by Tim B 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have to disagree with the statement "more than 11 years on thin ice". I am currently in a relationship (3 yrs.) with a man that is 48, I am 26. I wasn't attracted to him because of age, we just get along great and we are very attracted to each other. I agree, if you don't like it then don't look but we are happy and love each other dearly. Good luck to all those in "age different" relationships!
2007-02-12 13:57:47 · answer #5 · answered by makeitclap23 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My boyfriend is 12 years older than me.... He's 33 and I'm 21..
I met him at my old job he went in to buy a part foe his truck and I would always work on Saturdays and I remember seeing him and just smiling at him. He bought the part and left and that was the last time I had seen him. Until I changed jobs and on my 1st day I was up front while they were getting my office ready for me, and he walks in and it was like djvu. And we started talking and have been. No one knows at work but he’s a wonderful person and I just am amazed on how much we know each other.
He said he wished he would have went back to talk to me that day but he got shy and when he seen me he said he couldn’t believe it..
I just told him things happen for a reason.
We have never looked at our age as an issue like other people might...
But he doesn’t act his age and I act older than mine...
I have always act older then my age and always hung out with people older then me not just by 5 years but my best friend is 32 years old.
But its our choose and its something we knew people would have I guess there own problem with and we are willing to accept that... And were happy with out choose!
The only thing that we notice is when Him and I go to dinner and we order a beer and they ask both of us for our ID's and the looks we get after they read our ages and how he is born in 74 and I was born in 86. But were happy and I wouldnt change it for the world...
As long as he can keep me happy and fed then I dont see why age would matter?
2007-02-12 14:03:40 · answer #6 · answered by ♥ 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There is 12 years difference in mine and my husband's age. Age isn't a factor, your love and your bond is what is most important. Everyone always has to have a opinion, doesn't mean they are right. As far as attraction it was love at first sight, we where engaged within a month after dating. Age never mattered to us, what we felt for each other was what mattered.
2007-02-13 00:24:07 · answer #7 · answered by mariewells 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it was pure attraction for me. A great sense of security in being with a much older man. Me 27 him 42 so we have about 15 years between us. We have been togetther for 5 years and whild sometimes it seems as though we are too different it is great because who wants to be with someone just like yourself.
I keep him young and he keeps me grown.
2007-02-12 14:02:07 · answer #8 · answered by Buttercup=sweetness 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Im getting married soon and never thought the love of my life would be 13years older then me. He is the man I have been looking for and can't find in these younger guys. If you want to be happy then you can't be narrow minded, he makes you happy and you make him happy, your not going out with his age you are with him because of him. No one has to look if they dont like it. By the way I'm 24 and he is 37.
2007-02-12 13:50:27 · answer #9 · answered by tralw2000 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
my bf and i are at the same age but i understand ur feelings of being together with an older man. age differences mean nothing i think. you may first be attracted to somone by his appearance or sth but you won't love him bcz of that. there must be sth inside this person that makes you fall in love with him so just love him and forget about all the other things and other's thoughts. wish you happy with him :)
2007-02-12 13:52:14 · answer #10 · answered by Dorothy 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋