My wife left me in September and have been trying to heel every since. I told myself not to date for a 8 to 12 months. I recently met a really cool woman at church and for some strange reason, before I knew what was going on, I had asked her out to lunch!! Like my mouth was talking and my brain was going "Hey...stop that!!" We ended up spending the whole day together and then even having dinner together too!! I really had a good time. I guess my question is, is it possible to have real feelings this soon after a scar like what have? I actually kind of like this girl and I can't tell if it is because I am needy or if I am actually compatiable.
2007-02-12 05:36:08 · 11 answers · asked by fedup 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Nothing wrong with testing the water, just keep it light and simple and have fun.
2007-02-12 05:40:10 · answer #1 · answered by swtlilblonde31 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
There is no pre-set time of grieving over a lost marriage before you can begin dating again.
You say you met this woman at church - have you thought about the possibility that God put this woman in your life to help you heal and grow? You were attracted to her, and obviously she likes you to want to spend so much time with you. She seems to have come along at just the right time.
The one thing to keep in mind - you are never going to forget your ex-wife or your divorce. What you can do is decide to keep going, and not to allow those wounds to stay open any longer. It doesn't sound like you're needy, in fact it seems the complete opposite. You weren't looking for a relationship it just happened to fall in your lap.
As long as you continue thinking that you have scars, you'll have them. Let them go - and enjoy this woman. Enjoy having fun and being with someone and let go of the sorrow of the past six months.
2007-02-12 05:49:07 · answer #2 · answered by noncrazed 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it's a good sign that you met in church- she probably has the same moral/ideals as you. There is nothing wrong with having feelings or being excited about meeting someone you are attracted to. There is no time limit on healing a heart.
Just be open with her about your past, so she knows that you need to go slow.
Good luck!
2007-02-12 05:42:58 · answer #3 · answered by 1912 Hudson 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
in trouble-free terms you are able to ascertain if it is too quickly. there is not any set time line, basically flow with what feels sturdy. make certain you're taking it sluggish. i began out a relationship 4 months after my husband left me and we basically broke up after 8 months. I comprehend now that it grew to become into in trouble-free terms a band-help that i grew to become into putting on my discomfort via fact boy does it harm greater beneficial than it would. sturdy success!
2016-10-02 00:42:03 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Personally, I don't think you owe the wife a mourning period if she bailed on you. If you're dumped, you're dumped. As soon as that car backs off the driveway, pick up the phone and make plans.
Vis a vis your nice friend from church. Go slowly. See what develops.
2007-02-12 05:40:33 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
It's not too soon everybody heals differently. It's been almost 5 months obviously she's not coming back so move on with your life good luck
2007-02-12 05:42:00 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
follow you heart - the only person that knows whether or not it's to soon is you and your heart. What is honestly wrong with going out and enjoying someones company? You're not "dating" your having lunch/dinner and enjoying someones company and conversation. Think you're thinking to much about it - relax and enjoy life.
2007-02-12 05:40:20 · answer #7 · answered by T C 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You bet. The best way to get over a big hurt is to find someone else..... we are meant to be partnered,,,,, at least most of us are. Life is just better with someone compatable..... Don't rush into anything, but yeah, good for you
2007-02-12 05:44:25 · answer #8 · answered by April 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why wait?? its not like you have to marry her..just take it slow become friends first. it sounds like you are ready to get on with your life..that's great....if you didn't feel that you were ready you wouldn't of asked her out. You are entering a new chapter in your life..make the best of it! Good Luck
2007-02-12 05:44:38 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey DO YOU!
2007-02-12 05:49:53 · answer #10 · answered by Tricee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋