I love him very much he loves me, we are talking about our future and children but... I have just finde out that he is in debts plus doesnt earns so much ....... I dont care about his money but how can we cope in the future when I stop to work and he will look after our family?? I dont know what to do?? I dont want to loose him because of money.... I dont want to end our relationship because of money... But do we have future together? I am 30 yo and thinking about having a baby with him one day... Please help!!!
2007-02-12 04:30:47 · 15 answers · asked by Elen 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Whoa, take it a little slow there. It sounds like you have a wonderful catch and I could only wish to find such a guy... Debt is a big problem but if you're smart about it, there are ways to gradually get out of it. If you're planning on spending the rest of your life with him, then it shouldn't be a problem for you to work a little before having children, and even if you have kids you can still work on the side or from home. Definitely don't leave a great guy just because of money, you can work it out!
2007-02-12 04:36:58 · answer #1 · answered by Lowa 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the fact you're coming up with all these financial reasons worries me. But regardless, you both would either have to work out a tight budget, make a large savings sum before having the child, or try to get better pay/jobs for the future. As to the debts, some people know how to save money, and some people just know how to spend it. Good luck.
2007-02-12 04:40:00 · answer #2 · answered by Cory W 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The question here is, how much would you be willing to put up with him? And of course, whether or not he has the will, the potential, and the capability to increase his earning and deal with his debts. If he does have the will, potential, and capability to earn more, and is taking steps to do so, and paying back his debts, then I think you are fine. Sure, maybe you will have to suffer a little bit, maybe instead of a $100/plate steak, you'd have to take $15/plate pasta. But hey, at least you're not getting evicted from your apartment, nor your electricity got turned off. Then again, this goes back to the first question of how far you're willing to go for this man.
2007-02-12 04:44:26 · answer #3 · answered by babyLemon 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you really love him- money shouldn't be an issue. Work with him to get his debt in controll- if it means making arrangements to make payments, etc. He might need to get an extra job where the money only goes toward his debt.
You should hold off having a child until you're financially able. And it's not unheard of for you both to work AND have a child. It doesn't sound like you'll be able to afford the luxury of being a stay at home mom.
2007-02-12 04:52:25 · answer #4 · answered by 1912 Hudson 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well does he have goals to become more sucessfull in life and make more money? This is something you need to consider because yeah you love him and want to be with him but in the future you need to be sure he can provide for you and your future children. As long as he isnt trying to spend your money then there is nothing wrong with being with him. Just make sure he dosnt want to sit at home and make you do everything all the time.
2007-02-12 05:11:54 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well you both go back to school get a degree get good paying jobs and then have kids.. whats so hard to figure out about that or you can do like my husband and i do since we got married young and dumb and had kids young we work our butts off every day and live in a nice house with two old cars that run just fine and pay our bill barely every month but we eat and have each other and thats enough for us.. i dont really see your point if you love each other then you help the other to better themselves if you can if not they you take them the way it is and make it work
2007-02-12 04:50:09 · answer #6 · answered by crazyme 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From your post I gather you are not that mature to consider marriage. He does everything for you? This is your idea of a relationship? You say you don't care about his money, but are wondering how he is going to pay for 'your' family? I think you should wait before you marry anyone until you get some more expirience with people and relationships.
2007-02-12 04:34:43 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi there,i think this one of the many things that women have to face and make decisions with in this time we are in.when you have made so much plans witha guy and things are not working out.here,i think you can one give him some more time but dont definitely nag him,encourage him mostly that he could be better.but if things wont change and as you know you are getting older and you cant cope,maybe another alternative-a new guy.but if you can cope,then you go ahead.
2007-02-12 17:52:28 · answer #8 · answered by bamboke 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he needs to get back to school, and get a better career going on. You could work till the debts are paid and you both are on your way to a better life style.
2007-02-12 04:35:36 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if the two of you are in love, things will work out and your future will be wonderful. you should NOT let money come between the two of you.
2007-02-12 04:35:08 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋