My husband has moved out...He said he cant stand the stress..(past question) I tell him every day I love him..all he says is "I know"...He comes over every day...talks about things we still need to do in our home...has only taken his clothing nothing more...is living with his mom and dad. we still make love but he will not kiss me...Help...
2007-02-12 01:43:10 · 12 answers · asked by hurtalloveragainks 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It was his idea.to be married....he fought very hard for me to fall in love with him...it took sometime but I did...now this...
2007-02-12 01:50:46 · update #1
He is refusing to say that he loves you, and he is refusing to kiss you. Therefore, he feels anger at you. You provide very few clues about why he might be angry at you. The most likely reason seems to be the relationship between him, you, and your two oldest sons. Apparently, he feels as though you take their side rather than his. This probably happens when he attempts to impose discipline upon them. Honestly ask yourself if you are undermining his authority over them. If so, you have the power to help your husband get over his anger simply by committing to backing him up. Don't allow yourself to feel that you are choosing your husband over your sons; instead, realize that your sons' behavior has caused a major fracture in your home and that they would do well to behave cooperatively in the household.
2007-02-12 02:05:05 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dear you need to have a good long talk with him to find out what
he truly wants out of your relationship. I believe you love him but
he might be more apt to move back in (if he loves you in return)
if you let up on him a little. Stop telling him you love him and see
how he reacts. That doesn't mean skip one day that means not
as often. Act as if your okay and distance yourself from him a
little. Men are naturally going to pull back from anything that makes them feel like they are loosing control of their life's. Get
the book men are from mars, women are from venus. I haven't
completely finished it yet but it really does give you a better understanding of why men react to things the way they do. Besides "ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS" Show
him you love him by just having a conversation that doesn't have
to be about feelings and relationship" Hope this helps a little and
good luck
2007-02-12 09:56:01 · answer #2 · answered by Karen K 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have become his Co-Dependant.
Is is in dire need of replacing his mommy with a new one.
You need to make a man out of him by taking him to a marriage conference and let him hear from other men!
There is a llot of men that learn How to Love the wife. How to lead the home. How to carry the responsibility. How to be there for you and you How not to be his mommy.
If nothing else just check out the website. www.familylife.com go to marriage conference. choose a date and have a blast.
2007-02-12 09:53:26 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well from what you have said it sounds like the love is on your part only and he is just using you for sex. If your husband loved you he wouldn't think twice about telling you and he wouldn't have moved out. Now he has his freedom and sex whenever he wants it. And for your own husband not to even kiss you? I would give him his time and permanently, you deserve better. Good Luck
2007-02-12 10:12:54 · answer #4 · answered by Lace 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes I agree with a previous answer. He is being very immature. He is running when it gets tough. My advice to you is to stay strong. If he wont kiss you then dont make love. Thats insulting and tell him you both need counselling immediately. Sure he probably needs his space but he shouldnt have moved out. Stay tough and tell him what you need and the sooner you go to counselling the better chance you have of saving your marriage.
2007-02-12 10:01:35 · answer #5 · answered by tivaj 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you married a baby. I'm inclined to believe that this marriage wasn't his idea, right? It doesn't matter how much you love him, if he's not feeling you the same way, it's a waste of time. You should have done this kind of thinking before you signed up to marry this dude.
2007-02-12 09:47:26 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think he is trying to see what it would be like without you. He wants to make sure if this is the right thing to do. He is confused. Maybe you should stop making love if its so impersonal. He cant have his cake and eat it too. Making love is not to discover love but to celebrate it. I hope things turn out ok for you. Good luck
2007-02-12 09:52:29 · answer #7 · answered by Bazano 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need counseling, either joint counseling or go for your own mental health and stability. Personally, I think you're a moron for sleeping with him. If he's not going to live up to his duties as a husband and wants to live with Daddy and Mommy, fine, but why should he get his rights as a husband when he's a baby, a coward trying to run away from the stress? If you're that desperate, buy a vibrator.
2007-02-12 09:48:30 · answer #8 · answered by Resurrected Lover 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
YEP, FAILURE TO KISS IS A BIG SIGN.
HE PROBABLY STARTED HAVING THE AFFAIR BECAUSE OF ALL THE STRESS AT HOME. NOW HE'S MOVED OUT TO TAKE THE INITIATIVE FOR DIVORCE PROCEEDINGS. HE JUST HASN'T BROUGHT IT UP YET. HE'S WAITING FOR SOMETHING.
5 KIDS, YEAH THAT'S ALOT OF STRESS. HHMM..... GOOD LUCK THERE. I DON'T KNOW ANYBODY WHO'D WANT 5 KIDS EITHER. THAT'S ALOT OF BAGGAGE.!! SORRY, DON'T MEAN TO SOUND LIKE A *****, BUT THESE ARE THE FACTS. I THINK YOU SHOULD GO ABOUT YOUR LIFE, DEAL WITH YOUR KIDS AND WORRY ABOUT A MAN LATER WHEN THE KIDS ARE GROWN. OR AT LEAST 2 OF THEM ARE OUT OF THE HOUSE.....
2007-02-12 10:01:50 · answer #9 · answered by sweetbabykitty 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you need to work with him and help he to get throw that stress he has you need to tell him that you are there to help him with the stress of life and everything that gets put in your way. try to find help from a marriage group or something like that. Good luck
2007-02-12 10:02:49 · answer #10 · answered by celticdragon 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋