I've had a relationship with one of my workmates. He has found another job and ever since I've started having problems with one of the girls who worked there with us.
Well, the point is me and her stay in the same office and she is always speaks harshly to me, even thoug I've tried to be kind with her.
I'm thinking about getting another job, but I get a good salary here. I don't know... What do you think I should do
2007-02-11 19:58:29 · 21 answers · asked by AnneMarie 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
You have a job. If you like it, keep it. She sounds like a bloody *****. Don't let her win. Stay where you are and work your ar$e off...show her your boss. The man should stay with you unless he is on another continent. Its more difficult to date coworkers I hear. Don't be nice to her. She thinks your easy to walk on. I don't take anything from losers like that. I will star you. I hope I helped. Don't let her make you feel wourthless.
2007-02-11 20:03:12 · answer #1 · answered by Heathcliff 2 · 3⤊ 2⤋
You can't let an unpleasant co-worker drive you away - though if a better job comes up, she might be a reason why it would be more tempting.
You don't really say how this unpleasantness is linked in to your relationship. Are you saying she's jealous? If so, you can try to keep things calm in the office by not mentioning your boyfriend unless he comes up naturally. Don't start every conversation with "Joe" this or "Joe" that - she might think you're the one who's being unpleasant, rubbing it in. You say you've "tried to be kind", but maybe she got the feeling you were pitying her, which would upset a lot of people.
It depends partly on how much you have to work with this person. If you can normally get through a day without interacting directly with her, I'd just leave it and hope she lets it drop. If it's a small office or you need to work closely with her, then talking to your supervisor might be a good idea - but try not to make it a confrontational thing, just say something like, "Jane seems to have issues with me and I don't really know what they are or how to resolve them. I don't have anything against her, but she seems to resent me, and it's making it difficult to work here. Could you act as an 'honest broker', and the three of us sit down and talk it through?" A good manager should do their best to help, especially as no manager wants to lose a good worker.
2007-02-11 20:13:38 · answer #2 · answered by gvih2g2 5 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Nothing to do with relationships at work.
I had a problem like this with a manager - she hated me and was always putting me down in front of others etc. this is a form of bullying.
Do the adult thing and approach her in a very non-confrontational way and ask if you've done anything to upset her and that the way she is speaking to and treating you is unacceptable.....
Maybe sounds naive but maybe she's jealous of you and this is her way to look BIG in front of others.
Good luck and address this head on!
2007-02-12 08:39:40 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
ignore that b****! DO NOT GIVE UP YOUR JOB FOR HER! you have no idea how happy she would be if you did - it would make her feel like the woman with all the power! and you don't want that do you? if you just say hi in the morning and bye when you leave (politeness is the minimum), everything'll be a ok! you'll be the inocent one and she'll be the one with the problem! you'll surely find other people o hang out with and so what if she's in the same office as you? you're at your work so, .... work! relationships with your colleugues comes AFTER work, it's only a plus if you're ok with your co-workers... good luck!
2007-02-11 20:04:34 · answer #4 · answered by Lux 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Are you still in the relationship? Did he leave because of your friendship? Did she have the hots for him and now blames you for 'making' him leave? Sounds like she's jealous! Try and have it out with her. If there's an issue involving the quality of your work she has legitimate cause to be concerned. But if she's just having a go at you because of this man, then it needs to be resolved. If her problems are nothing to do with work, then you need to talk to her, and perhaps even take it higher up the food chain. However, I wouldn't just leave because of her - what right has she got to 'force' you out?
2007-02-11 20:06:18 · answer #5 · answered by Roxy 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Hang in there. If you like the job and the salary is good, then it would not be in your best interest to leave. Your relationship with the guy who left is none of her business. Treat her professionally but don't try to be friendly until she acts better toward you
2007-02-11 20:01:52 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
Every time this victimisation happens make a note of it and if she sees you writing it down all the better. Why should you give up a good job because some one else has a problem?
2007-02-11 20:06:32 · answer #7 · answered by Robin C 4 · 2⤊ 2⤋
STAY! No matter what you do in life there will always be rude unkind people.They are in every walk of like, every neighborhood,every church,every family.That's just an unfortunate fact of life.You cant please all of the people all of the time, so don't bother trying,What I am saying is,You are the captain of your ship take it where YOU want.Life is short and time is precious.Please don't waste it worrying about other people especially people that don't give a damm about you.
2007-02-11 20:08:21 · answer #8 · answered by sandra b 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
No your company must have a policy about bullying look it up and go through this procedure with hr if you want to try to get a third party to speak to her she may not realise she is doing it Don't let someone else push you out
2007-02-11 22:24:21 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
If you go out and get another job, she becomes victorious...If it isn't in you to retalliate in the same manner, have someone else do it for you...
All you really have to do is scare the s h i t out of her...pretend you accidentally left your diary on your desk when you go out for lunch. Allow her to read where you buried the last b_tch that kept f_cking with you...
2007-02-11 20:02:16 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋