Do you think that bread is dangerous?

Question

1. More than 98 percent of convicted felons are bread users.
2. Fully HALF of all children who grow up in bread-consuming households score below average on standardized tests.
3. More than 90 percent of violent crimes are committed within 24 hours of eating bread.

In light of these frightening statistics, it has been proposed that the following bread restrictions be made:

1. No sale of bread to minors.
2. A nationwide "Just Say No To Toast" campaign, complete celebrity TV spots and bumper stickers.
3. A 300 percent federal tax on all bread to pay for all the societal ills we might associate with bread.
4. No animal or human images, nor any primary colors (which may appeal to children) may be used to promote bread usage.
5. The establishment of "Bread-free" zones around schools.

Answer 1

this is just more of t-bill's preposterous propoganda against the shiny toaster. sure, theres no denying the fact that bread is the number one cause of homicides among teens with mustaches, but what about bread's other impacts. scientists claim that bread when consumed in large doses may be responsible for the cuteness of puppies. so i guess you have to make a choice, do you want cute puppies, or a wave of homicides that is bound to cripple our society? i think the answer is clear, and if the shiny toaster is elected president, all mustachioed teens will get a free slice of bread...

Answer 2

Only if it is allowed to rise in your __________! You fill in the blank. Seriously, I am not sure about dangerous, but the additives in a loaf of commercial far outnumber the required ingredients and should not be considered healthful. For that reason, I only eat the bread that I or some one I know bakes. I think that if I can't say it, I do not want to eat it. PS: Spider, I don't agree with what you say, but it is quite a statement. Send it into Letterman for his top ten list. I'll bet he will use it. (*_*)

Answer 3

Yes, finally. The truth is out.
As stale and crumby as these fact may seem, it is no half baked scheme initiated by the pasta companies.
I also believe there should be random yeast tests on all main roads and in schools.
Thank you for being brave enough to rise to the occassion and bring us these statistics

Answer 4

Well, does that include croissants? English muffins? dough nuts?biscuits? hot dog and hamburg buns, too?

I'll take my chances and keep eating bread cause I am 58 years old and have always eaten bread and never killed anyone, robbed anyone/anything, or did any crime period.

Answer 5

Bread has a lot of carbs so I try not to eat bread.

Answer 6

Okay, I know who Zebra is now, he is Dr Atkins. :)
But you didn't mention the energy boost that all those carbs give you. Just the kind of energy boost that a homicidal maniac needs to get the job done. :)

Answer 7

I had no idea of all the dangerous this everyday product was CAUSING! On top that it is probably what is responsible for the US being so full of fatty mcfatersons!

Answer 8

Whatever, I love bread.

Answer 9

You should see the stats on water drinkers! It's ridiculous that the government hasn't done something about it.

Answer 10

bread doesn't kill people , people do! why is it only the poor bread eaters go to prison and the rich to rehab! ahahha!