insecurity?

Question

I move from my country (indonesia ) 10 years ago to Australia and i experience totally different culture . Iam actually a shy and a bit lacking in confident type of person . is it just in my mind that people against me becouse my mom said In australia if you don't have confident people will put you down even more , is it true where is the compasion?

Answer 1

I don't live in Australia, but people are people no matter what part of the world they are in. If you feel uncomfortable, then 9 out of 10 times you will look uncomfortable.
Try telling yourself everyday how wonderful you make yourself feel. For every bad or negative thing you say or think about yourself, say 5 positive things to try to out weigh those negative things.

The truth is, you should be less concerned about what others may be thinking of you. And try to focus on all the wonderful things you know and feel about yourself.

Answer 2

Your mom is only partially correct...

Confidence - - you get it by getting it...it's not limited to Australia...I'm not trying to be simplistic...it's not the same as "you fake it until you make it", because it's a function of other people's opinions (whether you've made it)...

Insecurity is what it would be to as a sailor lashed to the top of a mast of a ship tossed by a storm...insecurity is an inside job - - confidence is not...you might want to make sure you're not assuming that other people are against you...

I've found it difficult to return warm feelings (including compassion) toward someone who doesn't have warm feelings toward me...do you prefer keeping your own company...is it energy-sapping for you to spend time with more than one other person? Do you prefer a "phone friend" or do you follow up with going out to lunch?
.
If you're Introverted (a strictly Jungian definition), try to find other people who will give you permission to be introverted and validate you in your introversion

Carl-Gustav Jung was, at first, delighted with Eastern thought...later Jung reneged on his opinion, stating that Eastern culture was thousands of years old compared to recent culture like America (or Australia)...is Indonesia enculturated with Eastern thought? Could it be you sense that Australians appear shallow compared to what you're used to and they lack a certain depth?

Do a "reality check" and make note of your assumptions, correcting those that need to be corrected..."checking out" other people's attitudes or thoughts or feelings doesn't need to be scary...most people like to have a chance to give their opinions

Answer 3

You're mother was right in a sense... If you show your weaknesses to some people they will take advantage of you.

Ie. If you are a giving person, people will always take from you without bothering to give at all.

I suggest taking up a hobbie that will help you meet others and share something that you enjoy doing - this will help build your confidence and also help you make new friend who value you for who you are.

Answer 4

this is the same everywhere. if you dont have a certain level of confidence and self respect, people will try to take advantage of you.

i would suggest getting a hobby and doing something you enjoy. if you are doing something you will enjoy, your self esteem will rise and so will your confidence levels.

maybe you could join a toastmasters group? a friend of mine did this, and learnt how to speak articulately and with confidence, which not only helped her professionally, but also in her personal life.

Answer 5

Look for a Pisces friend....we have alot of compassion..