HElp with my mom please URGENT!?

Question

how do i handle the fact that my mom's boyfriend is a complete jerk and she jut got divorced over the summer. he has 2 kids that are kool but he is totally ruining our family and his family. coming from the 2 kids of both of the parents! the kids cannot live with any other family no family lives in the town and we are miserable! WE have already talking to the parents but they like eachother too much they are always texting and calling eachother and are not having time for us(the kids) we are feeling neglected. we have tried making there lifes miserable(not working) tried making them feel uncomfortable(not working) HELP please give us good advice

Answer 1

I wish I knew all of your ages. But, since I don't I'll presume you're all between 12 and 15. And, blending families can be hard even if you like the other kids.

You said you've tried talking to them, they're focused mostly on each other, and you've tried acting out. Did the four of you think about calling a family meeting? Tell your mom and her boyfriend that the children have something important to talk to them about. Don't tell them what it is until you all get in one room, cell phones turned off, and have their attention.

Tell them that you all can see how much in love they are with each other, and they may not realize how lonely, neglected, and sad the four of you are. I would say that you feel they have put up a wall between themselves and you children, and it breaks your heart. If some of you are older say 16, then remind them that soon you will be gone from home and they won't have a second chance to develop a bond that seems to be slipping away.

Talking with adults can be difficult. They may not take you seriously and I would say be ready for that to be the case.

But you've tried. They would be selfish, thoughtless adults who want what they want, and now, over and above their children's needs. And that's not good parenting.

To care for the four of you and your emotiional needs doesn't mean the adults will lose a thing. But they need to parent; they need to look beyond themselves.

You can give your mom and her boyfriend a copy of my answer here.

You can talk to a counselor at school. But there's little that you can do if they don't listen. You'll need to get help from an outside source because children deserve to be heard and nurtured and parented. And, they deserve to be in love. But not so that they stop being parents and act like teenagers again.

I'm sorry for your pain. Good luck, and look for adults to help you...at church, school, relatives. OK

Answer 2

Your saying neither of them work? Then why are they always texting each other? Arn't they both at home? And do you know how they are getting the money to pay for these phones and the house and food utilities. Sounds like a mess to me. You have told them that they are ignoring you guys and you need more attention and they still don't give it to you. ummm.. Well let me start with this, if I have the facts straight. Making them miserable will not make them change. Have you heard the saying you can get more bees with honey instead of vinager? Well if you kids get together and totally change the way you are behaving then when you have something to say they might listen. They have started tuning you out if you have been complaining. If things get worse you can always start going to church and meet people there and sooner or later the people at church are going to start asking questions. depending on how old you kids are depends on where you can hang out. I don't think this relationship will last too long so be patient. After the new wears off they will start fighting because if they aren't working things are going to get tough and they are going to get sick of each other. Hope this helps a little. Be strong and be good.

Answer 3

there is not a whole lot that you can do;they have the power.i was raised in a situation like yours except there were real,step,and half kids.we just went with the flow.it got so bad,that when i got older,i moved in with my friend and adopted his parents,and if not for them,i would not have graduated from high school.what you can do,like me,is to make sure your own family will be normal,like mine,6 kids,same mother same father,5 delivered by same doctor and in the same hospital.if i were to wish something on someone i did not like,i would wish them to be alone.its not right,but look at it from their side.love is in the air and it makes people a little crazy.what ever you do,do Not Blame yourself.its about boy-girl,boyfriend-girlfriend,man-women,husband-wife,and you are the beautiful product of it.they need to grow up,can you spank them;i sure can't.

Answer 4

Just talk to your mom, every mother's kids are more important to her than anything else on earth. If she doesn't listen and doesn't care how this affects you, say i am moving in with my father or grandparents. Sometimes the threat of losing someone they love makes them wake up to what is important.

Answer 5

grow up. instead of trying to defeat them why not try working to become a family. i'm going to give you some advice my 22 year old gave her 25 year oldest sister. no matter how hard you try to break them up, their love will get stronger and stronger. we are grown and they have been together for 6 years and he still haven't left. work with them or lose maor vice versa.

Answer 6

honestly, i don't think you're right here....i'm not trying to be mean ,but it is best that you understand that your'e not going to always agree with what your parents do....that's the bottom line!!!!....it sux and i was in your position once, and i felt the same way as you, but if you can "dig in" and support your mom, it want be too long before the situation works itself out!!!!....promise...good luck

Answer 7

Why ask how to change someone else. Change yourself and learn to adapt first. Your mom will see your sincerety when things are not working there, she may though ignore your rebellion,(neglect) remember that.

Answer 8

Tell your mom to move on and their is someone out there better for her.

Answer 9

Study hard, get a job and then get the hell out of there.

Answer 10

child go read a book
if he makes your mom happy why don't you try to stop been selfish and give them a chance