Why are so many people married 2 or 3 times? Why can't they get it right the first time?

Answer 1

Married once.
23 years this May.
Two adults daughters.

Consider these thoughts before getting married:

1. Life is not story-book easy.
2. Lasting marriages take cooperation.
3. Lasting marriages require compromise.
4. Lasting marriages generally require forgiveness.
5. Lasting marriages are founded on the principle that you will love the person you married even when you do not feel "in love" with them any more - real love is about commitment!

Statistics show a divorced person will most likely get married the second time to the same type of person they married the first time. With the second marriage they either learn to accept the five points above, or they get divorced again. Guess who they marry the thrid time around? The same type of person all over again.

Answer 2

For me the reason would be that the first time I got married, we were way to young. After 5 years we had grown up and apart. I dated my husband now for over 6 years before we got married and after almost 8 years, we are still, if not more happy then we have ever been. It take a lot of maturity, willingness to compromise, trust, respect and honest to make a marriage work. I don't think a lot of people have enough life experience the first time around.

Answer 3

So many people don't take the time to find out who they are themselves and who they are in Christ before they jump into any type of relationship. You should be 100% before trying to involve someone else in your life. They also don't know what to expect because a lot of people don't have good role models. We go into these things with blindfolds on and when things are not the way we expected, we bail out because we don't want to deal with anything and commitment doesn't mean anything. Also, the man has a role in the marriage and so does the woman. Until you are ready to commit to God, there will be trouble. I say this because a marriage is a commitment to your spouse and a covenant to God. It is a three party realtionship that must have Him first in both lives. Once you have that, you will still have your moments where you get upset or unhappy but God can fix it all if you give it to Him. People need to know what marriage is truly about and stop picking your mate, Let God do it because if you allow him to do it, You have the one that you are supposed to be with.

Answer 4

My guess is that you've never been married. Here's the deal...people generally have unreasonable expectations about but they don't realize that they are unreasonable until after they're married. Also, marriage is completely different than what anyone thinks it will be. AND to top that off...people change over time and sometimes they become two different people and grow apart. Sometimes you think you know someone until you leave with them...the reasons are endless. Don't you think people want to get it right the first time? Of course they do but sometimes they just don't. I think marriage is an antiquated institution anyhow. And who cares how many times someone gets married anyhow, you know?

Answer 5

In many cases, people rush to get married and don't really spend the quality time to get to know the person. Also, society today says that if you aren't happy, then get out of the marriage. So now instead of trying to work through the tough times people just give up on the marriage and repeat that pattern with the next one.

Answer 6

Sometimes you dont marry for the right reasons or one spouse cheats many times on a spouse or there may even be abuse involved. No one is perfect in this world so we do not always get it right the first time around. It would be a much better place and world if we did though now wouldnt it?

Answer 7

It might not always be there fault because they might have thought they picked the right person and it turned out to be the wrong person. It is just like have several boyfriends or girlfriends over a period of time only they weren't married all of those times. You might marry one person and they cheat on you and then marry another one and they are abusive, etc.......The divorce rate is over 50% in the United States so more than half the marriages aren't working out.

Answer 8

I've been married 3 times.some times things change in a married relationship that you don't see until you have been married.
In 2 of them things change after 6yrs on the second I was just plain stupid not even 1 years but that was a bad bad marriage.
Now #3 is a dream but it took me life's lessons to find each other.Plus 17 yrs of being single.
I found me in all that time.We forget who we are and let others change and try to shape us.Not grow together and bloom as a family.

Answer 9

Because they either don't take the time to really know who they are marrying or they marry people for the wrong reason. If you marry someone because they look good, or have money or power, it won't last when the hard times come and they always do. If you are really in love, chances of staying together are much better.

Answer 10

I think we live in a culture where we expect happiness right away and find it hard to persevere through very difficult times. Older Americans, like my grandparents, lives through the Great Depression and WW2, and no matter how successful they became they carried a humbleness around with them, as if they expect difficult times ahead and are always prepared for it. And here we are, our generation, and we whine about getting bored or settling in to a routine or "needing" something new or different. Though I am a part of it, I think we are a spoiled generation, unable to survive the tough times in marriage or life. Life is SUPPOSED to be a challenge, commitment wouldn't mean anything if it were easy to stick to, and building a solid family would be of no value if the pieces could just be broken apart and put together again without consequence. I wish we could teach the next generation that life is hard but to stand by their promises and pass that commitment to the next generation, but the cynic in me knows that divorce and step-parenting is now a part of our culture. Ugh.