My husband has a friend, who is a real jerk. He treats his wife and family really bad. And is just a jerk to everyone he comes into contact with. The problem is when my husband hangs out with him, he starts to act kinda like a jerk too. I am not one to tell my husband that he can't be friends with someone. What should I do??
PLEASE NO RUDE, CRUDE, OR OFFENSIVE COMMENTS..
THANKS!
2007-02-11 13:23:00 · 16 answers · asked by Thia K 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I think that I would quietly ask my husband if he ever noticed how "Jim" was around his wife and family. If he hasn't, ask him to pay particular attention next time he's there. If he has, ask him what he thinks--a specific time or example would be good. Then, calmly and sweetly tell him that when he spends a certain amount of time with "Jim", he takes some of that behavior with him. You love him, and care about him, but you're concerned about the behavior changes. Could he pay attention to that in the future?
You are NOT telling him that you don't like his friend...in fact, you can point out a good point or quality that he has (like he takes good financial care of his family etc.) You are just pointing out the behavior that is affecting him and ultimately you. Be your sweet self, and if you say this in the right spirit, you will be fine. If hubby gets defensive or upset...well, then, you have hit a nerve and he will just have to deal with it. Don't say any more. Walk away, and let him cool down. I hope it doesn't come to that. Good luck.
2007-02-11 13:50:47 · answer #1 · answered by Nisey 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You can't really tell your husband whom to be friends with, but if he acts like a jerk in front of his friend, you should surely snipe back at him with a wisecrack response. This would let him and his friend know that you are not one to be toyed with.
2007-02-11 13:27:57 · answer #2 · answered by Lisa D 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell your husband how you feel and why. Ask him nicely to please stop being around this friend. You dont have to be near this guy or have him at your house either. No you cannot tell him who to be friends with but you can caution him about it and make a suggestion.
2007-02-11 13:31:14 · answer #3 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
tell him that you have very uncomfortable feelings about his friend, we meet up with people that are rude/ and are jerks all the time, its best that you just keep your distance from him when he's nearby if he has any consideration at all he will sense that you dislike him.
gently tell your husband that you don't like his attitude he has when he spends time with his friend.
2007-02-11 14:07:10 · answer #4 · answered by ~muffun~ 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My husbands friend???
2014-12-14 20:18:36 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
JUST TELL HIM THE TRUTH THAT YOU'VE NOTICED A CHANGE OF HIS BEHAVIOR WHEN HE HANGS OUT WITH HIS FRIEND.. AND THAT YOU DO NOT APPROVE OF THAT FRIENDSHIP.. HE WILL TELL YOU THE SAME IF YOU HAD A FRIEND WHOM HE THINKS IS A BAD INFLUENCE ON YOU.. JUST MAKE SURE THAT YOU DON'T ARGUE ABOUT THIS MAKE IT AS IF IS AN OBSERVATION AND YOU ARE CONCERN ABOUT THE MARRIAGE. BECAUSE YOUR MARRIAGE IS VERY IMPORTANT TO BOTH OF YOU.GOOD LUCK.
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