Is it better to go out with the "wrong" people than not go out at all?

Question

I've been going out with this group of people for a year.
I can tell that one of them doesn't like me and I suspect she could affect the way the others see me. I could have some things in common with the other two girls but I feel as if I have to prove myself against the things this other girl could say behind my back.
In addition, they have been known each other a long time before they met me and as a result they end up talking about shared experiences during which I find it impossible to intervene.
In the end, are they worth all this emotional pressure?

Besides these people, I have only one friend. Her name is Helen and I feel very comfortable with her.

Answer 1

I think that you don't have to prove yourself to these girls..If they really like you and think you're ok, they won't listen to that third girl..besides, you just have to be yourself, and if they still continue to behave differently, than stop going out with them..you have Helen,and she's probably better than the three of them together..
and when they talk about their experiences, you should talk about yours too, and compare with theirs..and then you'll probably find some kind of connection with them..

Answer 2

I wouldn't waste my time. I think that finding the right group of friends to go out with can be difficult sometimes but that in the meantime hanging with the wrong ones can give you a bad perspective on how people treat each other. Give up going out with these friends. Find a group(book club), take a class(academic, exercise) get a hobby(knitting,scrap booking,bike riding,marathon training),or volunteer(animal shelter,hospital, Obama 2008 presidential campaign :) in which you can find people who have similar interests as yourself and see if they want to go out. Maybe they have a kinder group of friends that you can mingle in with easier than the group you are with now. Once you find a good group you will be able to have so much better a time when you do go out too.

Answer 3

Apparently you and I have a lot in common. When I was in high school, I hung out with anyone that I could (always the wrong people) because I really wanted friends. All I had was a couple of friends and I was very nice and very pretty. I always went out with the wrong boys just so I would have someone to go out with. That really messed up my life for a long time. I'm 37 now, I finally found a decent man, and my life is finally straightening up. I even have finally started coming out of my house and meeting new friends. Now I have decent friends. So, find a good person rather than go out with the wrong person. If you have to prove yourself to someone just to get them to go out with you, then she isn't worth going out with. Someone that truly likes you will like you for yourself and not make you prove anything to them. True friends don't ask anything from you except to be yourself. Take this from someone who has been through this all of her life.

Answer 4

Stick with Helen as you seem to share a good friendship with her. If your 'friends' are judging you they are really not worth the time. If you have time on your hands, take up a hobby or two and start reading more as there is so much to learn. If they ask why you are not hanging out with them anymore, just tell them that you prefer to do your own thing.

Answer 5

No, it is not better to go out with the "wrong" people than not go out at all. It is better to find people whom you can align yourself with, who accept you for you, and wish to be in the company of you. That way, it would feel nicer for you IF you did decide to go out. You need to associate with people whom you establish some level of comfort with. You shouldn't feel you have to prove yourself around anyone, instead you should feel comfort just BEING yourself.

Express to them how they make you feel and watch the reaction to see if they even care. If not, no, they're showing you that they're not worth the emotional pressure, but if so, they may show you they want to work issues out.

Answer 6

I wouldn't bother going out with somebody who doesn't like me. They don't sound very inclusive and I wouldn't enjoy it at all. Better to find somebody who you feel comfortable around. Just go out with Helen and have a good time! Doesn't matter if it's just the two of you you'll have a blast.

Answer 7

Stick with Helen!! the others sound like alot of hassle and life is too short to be hanging around people that your not sure of!

Answer 8

you can not call everyone friend! we usually have only few friends and the rest just ppl we know..I suggest you stick with Helen and forget about the trouble as you will have enough time to get involved in your life with silly emotions like this...there is nothing better that you trust only one person or just trying to be someone!

Answer 9

stick to helen, don't hang out with these people who don't give a thing about how you feel, if they are 'friends' with you, they won't do this kinda thing at all! hang out with helen...i've been a loner before and i really preferred being alone rather than hanging about with these girls who just despise you and show off in front of you just to make you feel bad about yourself. trust me, these group of people...not worth anything.

Answer 10

When I was younger, and none of my friends were available, I would go out by myself. I would never hang out with people that did not welcome me. I was, and still am, very independent. The same rule I applied to dating. I would not go out with a guy, ,just for a free movie, dinner, or to go to a club.This group of people that you are socializing with, are truly not worth your time or energy. You said you have one good friend. I would take ONE good friend any day, as opposes to MANY poor acquaintances.