Please Answer... About Jealousy?

Question

Okey this will sound SO stupid.. but i need a few answers. I have always known im quite a jealous girl.. but i never thought id be this jealous. Well the story goes.. iv always had to share my ex boyfrends with other girls... 'threats' my exes used to call them.. nice i know.. until me and my current boyfrend got together. we have been together over 8 months and everything is amazing.. the only thing that i see as a slight problem.. well not problem but something i cant help feeling is jealousy towards his younger sister - as he and her are very close... and when i am around he usually ignores me. and i feel like im second in his life if you get what i mean? i know i shouldnt feel like this but i cant help it. do i say something to him.. problem is i dont want to sound selfish but i cant help the feeling.. cos whenever im at his house.. i feel REALLY out of place.. like he wud rather me not be there... and its rele bugging me. please answer and share your views asap. thank you.. x x x

Answer 1

You can't win this one. All you can really do is understand that he's close with his sister. She's no threat to anything except for your love of attention. Other than that, you have to let that go. She's never gonna stop being his sister so the one he can get rid of in this situation is you.

On the other hand, you CAN talk to him about feeling so uncomfortable when you're over his house. In fact, you can tell him the same thing you're telling us. You feel out of place and it feels like he doesn't want you there.

Just be patient when it comes to his relationship with his sister and talk to him about the rest.

Answer 2

ha ok you have a problem you are hating on a sisterly brotherly love kinda thing i understand you are gonna feel out of place at his house they are 2 approaches to this 1 not go to his house and a void the sister or 2 which is sooo much better stop sharing ur dudes and discuss with him how you feel this may either get you dumped or you'll be closer to him there is no reason you should be jealous i mean they are relatives rite so you shouldn't be jealous

Answer 3

I know how you feel, my son's girlfriends would feel that way about his sister and his relationship with her, they are very close. But a word to the wise, don't make a big thing out of it, it's his sister, because my son always took his sister's side. So if you don't want to lose him, find a way to be a better friend to his sister, it may even bring you and him closer. Family relationships are much more deeper than strangers,I don't think he intentionally means to ignore you it's the way your are seeing it, because you can't get past the feelings that you have. If you find a way to involve yourself with her, you'll see maybe he will be jealous of the friendship you form with her. If it was just another girl, I would say talk to him about how you feel,but since it is his sister, I would'nt advise you to come between that, because you'll lose.So try that out and you may be surprised. Good luck

Answer 4

It sounds like you have issues with other women. It is good that your current BF does not give you reason to be jealous when it comes to other women. I know a few women who are like you in that they can't relate to other women, don't trust them, think the worst in them, and don't have many women friends. They always feel like they are in a competition or that other women judge them.
My brother dated a girl that was jealous of me, he and I are somewhat close but sibling love is totally different than lover love. We grew up together and have stupid jokes and games that no one else cares about. My brother didn't see me nearly as much as he saw his girlfriend (whom he lived with) so when we hung out he would talk to me and ask me questions. This is what your BF is probably doing too. He also may be trying to get the three of you to talk, doesn't want his sister to feel like a third wheel and figures you will understand.
Try to find some way to strengthen your bond with other women. The more you relate to other females the less you will have to be jealous of.

Answer 5

I totally understand the jealousy thing. I've had similar problems, only feeling that my best friend was putting her boyfriend above me. Whether thats right or reasonable or not is debatable, but thats not the point.
I suggest you say something to him. Chances are he'll pick it up from your body langage sooner or later. And better to tell him straight out than risk it being misinterpreted. It'll be an awkward conversation, but it'll be worth it. Also, keep in mind that its not unreasonable for someone to put their nuclear family above their significant other, especially if there is not a long-term commitment like engagement or marriage or cohabitation.

Answer 6

I understand what you mean, and it's only natural. Just don't let it get out of control and never admit that you're jealous. Instead, casually mention to him that you feel akward whenever you're at his house and tell him why. Ask if there is a reason why he shuts you out. Tell him that you don't like to feel so uncomfortable and may even not want to go to his house if this is how it will be.

Answer 7

This is his FAMILY, and you are in HIS house as a guest. If you want to run this guy out of your life, then complain about his family. That should do it !!! You know you have jealousy issues. I hope you have enough self discipline and concern for your boyfriend to show more maturity here.

Answer 8

try to be like him ..take care of his sister and show him that HE WILL NOTICE THAT U LIKE HIS SISTER AND HE WILL START LIKIN U MORE!! DON SAY A WARD TO HIM CUZ IT VAN SCARE HIM CUZ U DON HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DA GUYS THINK....MAYBE HE WILL THINK THAT UR OVER REACTIN AND DATS WILL TURN HIM OFF..OR MAKE HIM RUN AWAY FROM HIM SO BE CAREFULL....lol