my wife doesn't want to be with me anymore, im lost and afraid. i don't know what to do without her, i love her so very much. i could have been such a better husband, and it eats me inside to think that i ruined everything. i wish i could take it all back, i wished she still loved me. i have not been sleeping or eating much, not because i don't want to, i just cant. she says its too late...i don't believe that, its never too late to be a better person, and to conquer ones demons. i just wished she believed in me. i feel so empty, the things i do seem hollow and all for nothing. the most important thing in my life, my wife, is gone...i have been crying a lot lately, it kind of makes me feel better. i love her so much. i want her to be happy, i want her to be happy with me. i want us to be happy together forever. Andrea, i love you, and miss you so much...i am so sorry...
2007-02-11 04:45:37 · 8 answers · asked by dentlydreamin 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
i would love nothing more than to meet my wife on common ground so we could talk again, be friends again, love each other again. i am willing, so willing to compromise, id like so much to meet in the middle. i miss her so much, i don't know what to do. i want her to open her heart and let me back in so i can prove to her that i can make her happy. theres nothing as important to me in this life than seeing that gorgeous smile. it makes me whole. without my wife i am only a man, a man does not do well alone, that is why GOD created woman, the missing piece of a mans heart. i love my wife so much. she is the only woman for me. i just want one last chance to show her how truthfully sorry i am, and how my eyes have opened. i have been selfish in all the wrong ways, and for all the wrong reasons, i have written off her interests because they didn't interest me, i didn't try to find goodness in the things that brought her joy, if i wasn't interested, i didn't do it. i am so, so very sorry.
2007-02-11 05:16:14 · update #1
i was a jerk. i know you heard it before, but if you could only find it in your heart to forgive me, things WILL be different, i have found humility, and have turned over a new leaf. my worst day spent with my wife, is still more wonderful than the best day i could have without her in my life. i love you so much andrea, i am so sorry, i was blind. i am so scared, i cant loose you, i love you, forever...
2007-02-11 05:16:32 · update #2
Get some help and counseling for you to help you get through the pain and things like this. Call or write to Andrea and talk with her and tell her how you feel and that you want to work on the marriage with her if at all possible. See if she is open to trying to work on things with you. See if she would want to go to marriage counseling with you and give it another chance over time. Why does she feel it is too late to try or do anything? What you need to do is get help and start to change for real this time and prove her her that you have changed. Once she sees a change starting she may just start slowing trusting you again. You really do need to tell her how you are feeling and what you are trying to do. Apologize to her and ask her for forgiveness.
2007-02-11 05:18:39 · answer #1 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry, but it's too late.
Your marriage conduct is beside the point when she "falls out of love," and nobody likes to talk about someone getting victimized by divorce unless they have breasts.
I suggest you start bracing for the torrent of anguish that you're already catching a whiff of. If you think you feel bad now, the actual divorce will make you feel like you're in the ninth circle to the nth power.
First you're going to be hurt and in shock in alternating degrees. That's where you are now.
Next comes blinding, scalding hatred with a side of betrayal.
Then comes either healing, or burying. You're gonna feel numb at this point, but the hurt will break through sometimes too, just to keep things interesting.
If you chose to heal, you'll start to accept it all eventually, and you'll want to forgive her at some point because you love/loved her.
I'm personally at a crossroads. I forgave my ex for hurting me, but I seriously doubt that it is possible for people to stay together for life unless they are forced to do so.
DON'T HURT YOURSELF. I know it feels bad, and it's gonna get worse, but you have to keep going. You only get one shot at life, and despite your pain, somebody's life sucks more than yours, and they still live with it. I had to come to this conclusion to keep my own sanity.
You did say "it's never to late to be a better person," and you're right. Be a better person anyway, and it'll dull the pain a little. You also need to talk to someone to help you out, and who will understand the need to cling to something comforting you'll find that you'll develop while you're coping. Don't let that person be a romantic interest, though that's not what you need now.
2007-02-11 13:12:08 · answer #2 · answered by Travis 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow. Was this a case of things going badly for a long time? Did you cheat on her? So many factors will be involved in what you are asking. The first step is to figure out if she wants to save the marriage or not. Have you tried counseling? Even a family friend close to both of you may be able to help. If it's a case of small problems, they can be dealt with. The thing for you to do now is NOT to grovel at her feet. It makes you look weak and pitiful which is not attractive. Take small steps. WIN her back with your actions and thoughtful consideration. Not words...ACTIONS. Good luck.
2007-02-11 12:51:38 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately, you need to start to work through this. I myself was just served divorce papers less than a week ago. I am eight months pregnant, have a four year old son, and had no warning. We had our problems, and I always thought things would get better if we could just 'start over'. My significant other filed and I was left feeling desperate. Until you stop feeling desperate, you will not be able to be in control. Fight your emotions, think of the good times, but don't fret over unfulfilled dreams. You have plenty of time. Being sad is normal, the pain will ease, and you will be made more humble by the experience. Just think of it as a decision beyond your control. In order to gain control, you just have to except it. I started a goodbye letter-not to the man who broke my heart, but to myself. Don't waste one day-they are limited. Start living, as hard as it is, NOW. Take it one breath at a time.
2007-02-11 12:59:20 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
dude,
sorry man.
maybe if you want ideas on how to get her back you should tell us how you actually got separated and how you hurt her.
it depends on what you did to hurt her. You may wind up living with that pain for a while.
You may want to seek a professional therapist bro.
take care of yourself man.
2007-02-11 12:49:46 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
On my dear soul my heart goes out to you truely. All I can say, is that try your best to act like you dont care. For whatever reason, this seems to work.
2007-02-11 12:50:01 · answer #6 · answered by Mensa Head 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you ever tested Pull Your Ex Back technique? Visit at this place : http://www.ExRecoveryFormula.com . It may clearly explain anybody!
2014-08-20 02:10:57 · answer #7 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Although I'm sorry for your pain, it sounds like spilt milk.
I wonder how many times she cried and you didn't listen.
2007-02-11 12:59:15 · answer #8 · answered by Ade 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋