Husband wants move to Texas, kids and I don't?

Question

My husband of 6 years wants to move back to his home state. My kids and I don't. He says he is moving in July. My kids are 12 and 13 and are happy here and involved in sports. This is my second marriage and don't want to move my kids away from their dad. What do I do?

Answer 1

Stay right where you're at! He needs a "change of attitude", not "a change of latitude". If he's willing to move to Texas, knowing how you and the kids feel, you have MORE problems than whether or not to move with him. This marriage is in trouble!! Good Luck!!

Answer 2

I don't blame you for not wanting to move your kids away from their dad. I live in Texas, and my husband's family lives in Florida and if he said he wanted to move there, I think I would have to let him. For him not to consider your feelings in the matter is inexcusable. For him to just say he is going in July may be scare tactics or him just being a bully about it. Personally, I love Texas, but then again I have never lived anywhere else. My kids are very young, and my husband is their father which is different because we would be together wherever we moved and my kids are young enough that the whole getting readjusted issue is not as great as if they were teenagers like yours. I feel taking them far away from their father and their lives and friends would be horrible for them. My brother-in-law has a son from a previous marriage and the boy's mother has moved so many times I cannot count, resulting in him only seeing his father once every couple of years, and the relationship between father and son is almost non-existent as it should be. (again, we are in TX, and she has moved to Hawaii, Maine, Maryland, etc.) It is completely your life and you should do what you think is right, but in my opinion your children should come before any man, any time!

Answer 3

I think that he's being very unreasonable and childish. He's going to pout and stomp and move away whether you go with him or not? He needs to be an adult about this and discuss it with you, not make threats and move without you. Does he have a job lined up? Is the housing market better there than where you are now? If there is a good reason like that, then it's something that you should be open to considering with him. However, if he just wants to be "home," then it is absolutely unfair to move your kids for that.

Answer 4

You have two issues to deal with here: 1) if you truly love your husband you go where ever he wishes to work and 2) you need permission, from your ex, to move the kids out-of-state. If they don't want to go - then they have the choice (because of their ages) to stay with their dad.
You need to let your husband know what all is involved with this move. If you really loves you, and your kids, then he will help you in solving this issue.

Answer 5

Well, I think that it is awfully selfish of your 'new' husband to just lay down the ultimatum of moving back to his home state....is this how he typicaly is? Why on earth did you marry him then? I say, your first priority is to your kids, and if they are close to their Dad, moving them far away would be very hard on them. It's not about what you want, really, and if your 'new' husband can't see that, then he's not a very good stepfather, is he? We moved far away from my stepkids for one year, and my hubby had such a hard time with it that I was really glad when we moved back close again....

Answer 6

WEll, you just said it all"HE" said "HE" is moving.Tell him your not and why!Does he already have a job?costs money to just pick up and move.When ya get there where you going to live?You have children to think about here and what's the best thing for them.I feel you should write down all the pros and cons and just say I and the children aren't willing to move for all these issues .He can try and argue his side but he will never win as you have great reasons to stay.I hope you can find the courage to do this.Your children will for ever remember this.

Answer 7

Texas is great! It is a great place to grow up. You know, your kids need to suck it up...they have sports everywhere! At least it shows that they are able to adapt to change if they can move out of state and be happy!

How often do your kids see their dad?

A marriage is about compromise...you can't have it exactly your way and he can't have it exactly his way.

Answer 8

permit your hubby comprehend the style you're feeling. If he expects you to help him and the hot job, he would desire to help you. He desires to guy-up and tell his kinfolk to butt out of your corporation. He has to place his foot down relating to the sister and ex-gf. YOU and your toddlers are his kinfolk now and you return first. If he won't, then you definately've your answer. Marriage counseling would help if so, yet on condition that he's prepared to paintings on it. If it does paintings out and you reside in TX, then connect some instructions, crafting, and so on. Get out interior the community, volunteer on the scientific institution, animal look after, and you will meet human beings. your toddlers will meet others a college and quickly be in contact in activities so they are going to get used to issues, too. solid good fortune.

Answer 9

As with any other family issue it needs to be discussed and decided upon, regarding the advantages/disadvantages of all members. It's not totally his decision to make. Career MAY have an opinion as well. And at your children's ages, you may be on the borderline. Once they hit the ages of 14/15, some severe issues will arise that may change their lives.

Answer 10

You are supposed to follow your husband according to biblical law, to the domicile of his choosing. By doing so, you are following God's predestined plan for you and your family as well even though you cannot see it. I know how you feel, I will likely be moving to Texas next year, my husband's home state, too. At first I was wary, but I've been looking forward to it. Have you visited Texas. Its is a really cool place. But, if I were you I would try to begin to think of living there, check out some books about Texas, subscribe to Brilliance Magazine (Texas Style), and put your family first even though the kids aren't on board. I have 2 kids by the way, too.