My current college roommate and I have been best friends for over 4 years now. We have always gotten along great until recently. Her boyfriend has been bothering me a lot lately and he wont stop when BOTH her and I tell him to quit. My roommate and I had a big talk on the fact that I cant stand her bf and I worry that it made her mad at me. I have really tried to just deal with her boyfriend and all the crap he does. I honestly cannot stand him and feel miserable every time he is around. I think this has driven me away from my roommate and I'm honestly looking for new people to hang out with. Any suggestions on how I should deal with this?? I cant move out because I live in a dorm room. I have already talked to her about it but I dont think he will stop acting the way he does.
2007-02-11 03:58:08 · 9 answers · asked by that one girl 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
What a pain when you share a dorm with someone who has a jerky boyfriend. Just keep trying to talk to her about problems you can solve. Like, when is he there? Is there a time he could leave that would be considerate for you so you can have privacy, time to enjoy the dorm room that you are also paying for? I hope there are curfews at your college. It's sad when you are forced out of your own room so you can enjoy life, see if you can help her to see that you would just like some respect for your personal space, and suggest that she spend more time with her boyfriend elsewhere.
Also, maybe try telling her that you think he is not good for her and list some reasons.
2007-02-11 04:03:09 · answer #1 · answered by Sweet n Sour 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Obviously your roommate is more worried about losing a boyfriend than keeping a friend, guys come and go, but friends should always be there for each other. She's aware of how you feel and talking to him about isn't stopping him from acting like a jerk.Guys always like to wedge a friendship apart with woman, I don't know it's like they get some kind of thrill out of it. Sometimes they like the other person, but they are committed to the friend. It sounds like that may your case, he obviously knows you can't stand him, and maybe that's some kind of turn-on for him. But in reality he sounds like a jerk, and your roomate will soon find that out. You are right to avoid him when he comes around, because it will only cause you and your roomate tension. Hopefully she will be rid of soon, and if not she needs to be aware that if he is acting like that with you, he's probably doing it to other people to. It's hard to tell someone how stupid their boyfriend is being, because they don't take it as seriously as they should.The fact that you have been friends with her for a long time should mean smething to her. Have another talk with her and explain that you would rather not be around when he is, and for her not to take it personally, and a guy shouldn't come between your friendship, the two are seperate relationships, and you respect the fact that she likes him so as her friend just be there for her, because believe me she'll need you later down the line, when she see's what a real jerk he is. Good luck
2007-02-11 12:14:39 · answer #2 · answered by glorene b 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you are on the right track. Find some other friends to hang with. Go have fun. Be yourself. Do not write off your best friend however. Chances are she will wise up later and dump the jerk. Then she will realize you were right all along. Noticing what fun you are having without her will wake her up some. Just try to avoid him. if he persists in being a problem to you anyways, use a little reverse strategy on him. Give him a dose of his own style .Or set him up to expose himself for what he really is.
2007-02-11 12:08:19 · answer #3 · answered by TopCatt 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you let it bother you and he knows it then he will just keep doing it. Tell her that this b/f of hers may come between your friendship if he continues his crap. I'm not saying that she has to choose but she will have to lay down the law to him. She almost is choosing herb/f over your friendship anyway, there should be enough maturity for both.
2007-02-11 12:06:26 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he is a jealous person. Stand your ground. He just wants her all to himself. So that being said.. why not use his tactics??? Stand your ground and maybe it will push him out the door and out of your life at least. Find out what makes his skin crawl and do it alot.
Alex
2007-02-11 12:02:40 · answer #5 · answered by Osiris2067 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you guys are roomies so unless you have same schedule you shouldnt see much of her anyway. But if they are there when you want to be there ask here if they can go somewere else the rooms are only for sleepin and studying and you should not feel uncomfortable.
2007-02-11 12:05:31 · answer #6 · answered by Elizabeth Z 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Then everytime he is around excuse yourself. I know you care for her so don't bad mouth him. It will only hurt her.
Just let them both know how you feel about him by simply excuse yourself whenever he comes around.
2007-02-11 12:05:08 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
some advice im in college to and i had the same problem and what i did was i completly ignored him and just listened to my ipod, and read some magazines...
2007-02-11 12:03:39 · answer #8 · answered by mtv_luver87 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
set up a stituation where he could make a pass at you and if he does you have somthing to tell her
2007-02-11 12:02:13 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋