I'm dating a woman whose 12 y.o. son has oedipus complex. He does not want to share her with anyone she's dating. We're an interracial couple who have been dating for about 2 years. Any suggestions?
2007-02-11 00:29:59 · 6 answers · asked by Darren 2 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Try looking at things from his point of view for a second. Why would he want to share his mother with someone he perceives as a stranger? He and his mother probably do a lot of things together and he has her exclusive attention when her dates aren't around....he has nobody but her to discipline him or judge him. You need to make it 'worth his while' to include you in his little family and I don't mean by bribing him. Try taking him out just the two of you...have some fun with him that his Mom probably wont do like baseball or go cart racing...something mannish but something HE wants to do. Don't try and tell him what to do...that's not YOUR job. Include him in your dates now and then...nobody likes being left out. You are not only dating the mother you are being judged by someone already in the family so try to become his friend and he will relax.
2007-02-11 00:44:26 · answer #1 · answered by dragonrider707 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is a tricky situation. I think the best thing to do is to try and be nice to the woman's son, just be as nice as possible, and try to get him to at least accept that you are part of his mother's life as well now. Sooner or later he'll accept that fact. Talk to him about is as well, it'll help.
The Oedipus Complex is a difficult situation, but a lot of people can overcome it. Good luck!
2007-02-11 08:44:36 · answer #2 · answered by Corrida 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He is probably scared you are going to take his mother away. He is probably used to having all of her attention, and now he feels like he has to compete for it. Try including him in activities, or just you and him doing things together. Don't expect a change to happen overnight, give it time.
2007-02-11 09:46:42 · answer #3 · answered by kc 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
come on.. give that child a break..... he has to deal with a moms boyfirend who has a different color.... i think his fear is justified....
i think you are being judgemental on him by branding him as oedipus.....
this is an old cliche.... but it will work.... try becoming his friend
2007-02-11 09:20:22 · answer #4 · answered by importer911 2 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Get him a date?
2007-02-11 08:49:12 · answer #5 · answered by guy o 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
try getting friendly with the child...
2007-02-11 10:50:20 · answer #6 · answered by Analyst 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋