I have my husband with 2 sons, but I feel unhappiness because I found I was in fact a lesbian after I lived with my husband for 4 years . To find my true love, I join one great lesbian dating club(http://www.ldate.com/i/lesbianlove)...... and incredible that I found my soul mate about one month later. She also love me very much. We had a great online chat and I could not wait to have a chat with her face to face. After having a face to face chat with her, she said she could not live without me, she wanted me to marry her asap. I also would like to marry her, but should I desert my husband and two sons? Please tell me how to deal with the problem, I am really in a bad mood and do not know how to do.
2007-02-11 00:23:04 · 10 answers · asked by Lisa B 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
well first of all, if you only had one face to face chat,,,,,,, you shouldnt be thinking of marrying her,,, or being with her in a one on one relationship,,,,,,, you dont know her yet,,,,,, to me,,,,, leaving aside the lesbian part,,,,,,you seem unhappy and trying to replace one thing with another,,,,,,, if you are not happy with your husband,,,,, you need to end that,,,,, then start seeing other people,,,,,,,, get to know them, and decide if you wish to be with them,,, you should never think of deserting your sons,,,,,, keep them as a part of your life no matter what happens,,,,,
2007-02-11 00:29:05 · answer #1 · answered by dlin333 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
How old are your kids? If they are young, the impact on them needs to be considered.
Perhaps your having problems in your relationship and find that that was the safest place to turn. How can you know you are a lesbian or in love with anyone else for that matter if you have not lived with dated or been with the other person. You have only had the relationship from the comfort of your home and safety of your family.
All the while knowing, that if the on-line affair was only on-line you allways have your family to fall back on. That is not called a real relationship, just an escape from your present reality.
If you dont want your husband, then you should leave him. However, dont do it because of this woman. When you have emotionaly resolved leaving him and your kids, then you should consider other people. Going through a divorce is not easy on you or your family.
good luck
2007-02-11 00:51:27 · answer #2 · answered by DAD_to_3 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you had gone on an online chat room with men would you still be hetero.
Let me put it this way, you sound a lot confused by the attention of another woman. Maybe she says the things you want to hear but that does not make you a lesbian only confused.
Getting "married" to another based on one meeting and online correspondence is stupid no matter what your sexual leanings.
Presumably you have not been repulsed by sex with your husband in the past so your new found homosexuality is very suspect.
You need to step back and figure out what is going on in your head. It does not sound like you really know.
If this issue is real there is no need to hurry. Haste will result in a lot more hurt than is desirable.
Wait until you see how your sons react to this news.
2007-02-11 00:41:47 · answer #3 · answered by Flagger 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You should of ended your marriage before you started looking online for true love. Your husband is suppose to be your true love. If you are not happy in your marriage then your family will not be happy. Sit down and talk with your husband find out what is wrong. Is it you personally and the marriage. If you can't work it out then leave your husband but never leave your kids. When you had children your their life became yours. You live for your children now. Sit down and think if you do whatever you decide to do how would it impact their lives. It would always be negative as well as positive outcomes. Do whats best.
2007-02-11 02:51:12 · answer #4 · answered by Chuck 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
funny how its always after the children are born and the husband/wife never know... think of the lives you will ruin... look deep in your heart and make sure this is who you really are. sounds like you are confused since you are married and looking outside the marriage. get a divorce and find yourself before you go doing something you might regret.
2007-02-11 00:35:40 · answer #5 · answered by bluedanube69 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You have to think of your kids..what will they think..how will they react..will they be affected..which the answer to that one is yes..kids get affected by everything.
So you should be very careful with the decision you make.
It wouldnt be right to cheat on your husband..but you've got to think everything through before you make a complete decision..because remember ..kids are involved here..and kids always blame themselfs when things happen..and it completely changes them..their personality..their way of view of life.
You deserve happiness..but you've got to be careful with the choices you make..and you have to explain to your kids..depending how old they are what is going on..goodluck.
2007-02-11 00:34:29 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
No lady you should not leave your husband. In fact, bring in this broad to meet him and maybe you guys can have a threesome.
Then if she wants to become part of the family, you should make her do chores like wash the dishes, do the laundry, vacum the floor, mow the lawn.
2007-02-11 00:45:03 · answer #7 · answered by Billy Bob D 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Better reflect on yourself and what you truly want because its a huge decision. Weigh on things that matters to you most, what wcan bring you genuine happiness and who you love most.
2007-02-11 00:28:44 · answer #8 · answered by konfuzed_baby 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like anger and rebound to me. Maybe it does belong in the DSM
V.
2007-02-11 00:57:12 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
this is so weird.
2007-02-11 00:25:27 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋