my ex partner has refused mediation regarding contact with our daughter?

Question

he claims he will go direct to court to achieve an order.is it that easy and how much would that cost?

Answer 1

He'll not have much of case because he has refused mediation. It will be frowned upon by the courts. It can be quite costly if you have no legal aid. We tried to get my step-sons mum to mediate but she refused but going to court would have cost us a fortune (she had legal aid, we did not). It's a messy messy horrible situation. I feel for you xx

Answer 2

Unless he has a very good reason to avoid mediation any judge is going to question his reasoning. You would get a petition notice from the court once he has filed his case with them. If you qualify for Legal Aid (UK) make sure you get a good Family lawyer/solicitor. If you have to pay its about £150-£200 depending on how senior the solicitor is. The court will act in the best interest of the child, not the parent. Usually the process is reviewed regulary and can be quite a long drawn out process.
And because of this and is expensive.

Answer 3

I'm helping my husband with a similar situation, so I've had ample time to look up child visitation laws. You said ex partner, so one assumes you weren't married. As the unmarried mother you have a basic primary right to custody, but he is entitled to reasonable visitation. The only time the courts would grant mediated visits, is if there is a history of physical violence. And that is something you would go to the courts, and have them stipulate. From his perspective, if you refuse to grant him "Reasonable Visitation" he goes to the courts and they impose a visitation schedule upon you, and you loose a say in where and when he sees your daughter. The process goes something like this; He goes to the clerk of the court and files a visitation stipulation basicly stating you are unable to cooperate with one another in setting up a visitation schedule, or one or both of you is refusing to adhere to it. The clerk of the court charges him a 300$$ filing fee, and then the courts set up a visitation schedule without the input of either of you. Basicly a crappy situation you should avoid if possible. However, to answer the second part of your question, it shouldnt cost YOU anything, he'll have to pay the court costs. It only gets pricey if you contest the order, or if you have to in turn file on him for not holding up his end of the deal. On the seriously negative side, although you can refuse him visitation on a case by case basis if he, say, shows up drunk, or very late, He can take you to court if you refuse him visitation, and the courts can withhold child support till he's allowed visitation again. I hope this helps you, and you get what you need for this. For more information, go to your county's website, and look at the children and family laws. They should also have a copy of the visitation schedules they use.
Good luck! :)

Answer 4

It would cost him a few hundred to issue his application in the county court and no, he doesn't have to go to mediation, although it will affect his chances of getting any public funding. It may also have an impact on the court's view of his conduct - the courts don't like it when someone uses them as a sort of theatre to try to upset or humiliate the other party. That's not what it's there for. It is there to settle disputes quickly and sensibly and it is not interested in silly game playing. There is something called a "pre action protocol" which provides that people are supposed to do their best to try to settle disputes without bothering the court. It sounds as if your ex is enjoying the prospect of going to court and hopes that you will "be scared" by it. This alone will go against him.

Answer 5

Nothing from you unless you get a lawyer (which is the smart thing to do). He is just not going to play games. He knows mediation is cram packed full of women counselors that are one sided and do their best to give the kids to the wife, along with a monstrously ridiculous child support. The court however, has changed. They are letting more and more husbands take control of the children. I personally agree with this concept. That's the way I got custody. Either way the court will be fair, and even you can't complain about that. Your ex sounds very mature. I don't think your going to like the outcome!

Answer 6

It depends - I assume that you are in the UK - if you are in the UK, he could well go straight to court and apply for an order to see his daughter more often! BUT, it is expensive and the court can actually, in view of your request to go to mediation, order him to go to mediation sessions!

If this is the case he will be responsible for all his court costs and solicitors costs - in all honesty, it is better for your child to sort out the problem via mediation, in an amicable as possible way!

The courts are not interested in his view or your view (to a degree) - they are only concerned with the well being of the child! Things have changed a lot over the last couple of years and indeed, it is not uncommon for the child to be asked her wishes (obviously by trained proffesionals) and this to be given into evidence in court -

Answer 7

If he goes to court and get's an order for contact, it will be granted and you'll have to accept the mandated schedule of visitation which is much more detailed than you'll like, but you'll have to do it or go to jail for refusing to submit to that visitation schedule.

What it basically means is that your ex partner will get more opportunities to visit with his daughter than you ever thought was possible. Once it's applied to any given situation like this one for instance. You'll soon realize you should have been more open to letting your ex see his daughter more often.

In my state if you violate the visitation order even one time it can put you in jail so fast it will make your head spin.

My ex wife wanted to let me see my daughter on her terms, she had to be present all the time during the visit. my daughter and i couldn't even have a conversation without her constant butting in, so i went on the internet and found that bit of information went to court and got that court applied visitation schedule ordered.

My ex went to jail 4 times for refusing to abide by that order, before it began to sink into her thick skull. My daughter and i were able to visit exactly according to the visitation schedule that the court ordered.

My ex hated it, and wanted me dead because of it, cause she could no longer use visitation as a means to control my daughter and i. My daughter asked me to do something so she could see me more often. So i spent $1000 US on attorney and court costs.

My daughter and i have always had a close relationship that just plainly infuriates my ex or her mother.

Answer 8

Has judge said that you two are to go to mediation.? That is usually how it works.

If so then he has violated a court order.

When it comes down to it he may have to be the one to pay for it.

Answer 9

It seems to me he would have a very bad case when he refuses mediation. Only a fool would give him that order immediadly.

Answer 10

I always suggest that guys go to court. Visitation is far to important to leave up to a mutual agreement. Even if you come up with a schedule together, I would want it in the form of a legally binding document.