My brother was sexually abused and hasn't dealt with it. What can I do to help him? I was also abused.?

Question

When I was little I was sexually abused. I repressed my memories but in the past few years I have started remembering things and accepting that it did happen. During the time that I started remembering I became very angry and depressed, I started cutting, overdosing, misbehaving, and I also developed eating disorders. I still have an eating disorder and still also deal with self esteem problems and bipolar/ocd problems, but I've accepted what has happened and I'm thankful for having been able to deal with it and move on. I know also that my older brother was sexually abused by the same person, but he hasn't dealt with it like I have. He hasn't admitted it to anyone, possibly not even to himself, and I don't know if he has even realized what happened. He may/may not have repressed it. I have no clue. I just feel that it did happen from clues.He is a very angry person, he's abusive, he's always been a bully...etc. In other words, he hasn't yet accepted it. What can I do to help him? T.Y

And by the way, anyone that has a response as uncompassionate and ignorant as Elijah's need not bother replying. ******* ridiculous.

Also, my neices told my cousin and their school that they were being "touched", but nothing has been done about it. Should I tell my cousin, their mother, even though I don't know her well? (Unfortunately her and her children are now living with the bastard and his wife, I hate knowing this.)

Answer 1

some people can surpress it an get over it by themselves without help with there own minds an techniques..... but if you say your brother is abusive an angery make sure its not because of other things, if his life situation isnt that great he may be responded that way because of that not because of what happends to him...if you really are convinced its because of his childhood an definately need help maybe a heart to heart is in order i cant think of any other way. a stranger confronting him would really not be a good aproach i think

Answer 2

Take him somewhere relaxing and private. And begin to tell him how you feel about your abuse. And what it has done to your out look on life in general and the anger and guilt you felt and still feel. Talk about the agony it's caused your family. Was the molester held accountable? If not his anger may never go away. And I believe you truly need some spiritual guidance when dealing with this topic. Because unless treated with extreme understanding most victims turn out to be abusers themselves. It's something that hunts you mentally for the rest of your life. And you need to know you can go to the lord for support and protection from satan's harm .

Answer 3

There are many coping mechanisms that people use to deal with all kinds of situations and repression is on form of coping mechanism... also purposefully setting it iaside and getting on with life the best you can is a coping mechanism...

There are no oerfect or right ways to cope any particlar problem... what works for one may not work for another..

Let your brother deal with his abuse his way.... let it go... forcing him to remember, forcing him to talk about it... forcing him to do anything about it is a form of abuse itself...

as for your cousins children who are lving with the person who abused you you should tell about what you know... not what you presume or have been told... but do tell about what you know..

Answer 4

If you don't think he has realized it, then don't go in there being hero. You should ask what bothers him, maybe try to pick his brain, but he may be angry for different reasons...so don't drop that bomb on him. How do you know it is true anyway? Ask him what ails him, but don't try to do everything yourself. You may be a survivor but you're not a psychiatrist.

Answer 5

he need to get what he does to other and i think its not right he get away with it and needs to find him self looked up in a cage

Answer 6

i was molested when i was 5 years old by my babysitter and she was HOT!!! god damn i definitly didnt supress that, cause that was sexy!!!! best day of my life!