is it me? he says i do things to make him mad but i dont have a clue what im doing wrong. he says he wants to leave me but says he cant live without me in the breath. this as been going on for about 7 months. what am i doing wrong? is it me or him thats crazy?
2007-02-10 16:38:40 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Perhaps he has characteristics of a personality disorder? Specifically border-line personality? It's an "I love you" and the next minute "I hate you" situation.
Here are some of the behaviors:
Frantic efforts to avoid abandonment. Alternating extremes of idealization and devaluation. (See people as only truly evil or truly good). Quick shift in emotions. Paranoia. Angry outbursts. Feelings of emptiness.
I'm not saying that he has this disorder. I wouldn't know, I'm not in the relationship. He has to meet a certain criterias according to the DSM IV. Where specific behaviours have to occur frequently for a period of time.
Good luck.
2007-02-10 18:35:59 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's just a bad relationship right now. I don't say this too often, but you should try to get him to go to counselling with you. It sounds like there is a lot of things between you that aren't going to come out in the open without a pro's help.
Good luck.
2007-02-11 00:42:26 · answer #2 · answered by Big Happy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hee may have a personality disorder or something like that. Take him to a doctor and see if he has a problem or not. He may also need anger management. You both need marriage counseling that is for sure. Ask him what you are doing that makes him so upset and frustrated. Neither of you are crazy you just both need to grow up and seek help and counseling for your marriage to make it a better one.
2007-02-11 00:42:24 · answer #3 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He is mentally unstable and blaming it on you, rather than taking responsibility for something that is, after all, his problem and seeking help for it. The next time he says he wants to leave you but can't live without you, calmly say: "OK, in that case, I have decided that I can live without you." Then follow through and end this pathetic charade.
2007-02-11 00:42:37 · answer #4 · answered by Liz 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It isn't you !!!! It is his problem. He just doesn't want to let you go because of his needs.
I was in a relationships like this... not good for you at all.
Know who you are and don't let anyone tell you different if it isn't so. Stand up for yourself and set some boundaries with him and anyone else that might be doing this.
Communicate with him, don't let him intimidate or scare you. Take back your right as a woman, wife, human, someone worthy of love and respect.
Be good to yourself.
2007-02-11 00:46:08 · answer #5 · answered by Golden Smile 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you both have some issues to deal with.I think he is just to lazy to leave and find another woman to be with so he just stays and puts up with all the BS.
2007-02-11 00:44:26 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You need to see a good astrologer and they will take you and your husband's birthday and put them together and tell you what is going on. The Astrologer will tell you if the relationship is healthy and what you need to watch out for in the future with him.
2007-02-11 00:41:56 · answer #7 · answered by Ted (Canton,OH) 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
sounds like mind control games to me but I can't be sure since I'm not you...That is usually how wife beaters start out in a relationship...just be cautious.
2007-02-11 00:44:44 · answer #8 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You and your husband need to set down and talk it out.
2007-02-11 00:42:14 · answer #9 · answered by rebel_southern_cableman2000 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
not u. he is either bipolar or he is cheatin on u. no joke. u aint done nothing wrong.it might even be drugs. meth makes ppl like that too. find out which of em it is girl. and be safe
2007-02-11 00:42:00 · answer #10 · answered by devil_queen_biatch14 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋