Hey everyone, my husband has been drinking a lot more alcohol lately because he is having problems at work. When he came home the other night he told me to pour him some wine and he sat down in the living room. When I handed him the wine, he grabbed it really hard and it shook and spilled on him and the chair and he got all mad at me and yelled at me and then got up and pushed me around some. I was so scared and sad that I ran into my bedroom and cried. Little incidents like this have happened before but never this frequently. What kind of things can I do to calm my husband's temper?
2007-02-10 15:53:24 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
You call the cops. Let them settle him down
2007-02-10 15:58:46 · answer #1 · answered by mom_2scotty 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The easy part first. When your husband begins to drink there are two simple ways for you to stop him getting completely drunk.
SOLUTION 1: Get him to eat a lot. The drinks have to go somewhere, if that place (his stomach) is full, drinks will not enter; and also, food makes the body to produce relieving chemicals on the brain that reduce stress and anxiety.
SOLUTION 2: Make him do something he likes. If he is entertained doing some task, playing a game, or something similar that he likes a lot, he will pay less attention to the drinking, hence, less alcohol will flow through his veins.
The difficult part now. Someone drinks for 3 main reasons. To relax, to avoid or because its body needs it. It's very likely that your husband is drinking to avoiding some emotional issue. It's very common and its the first step of alcoholism.
If the main reason were his working problems, sorry, but he could talk to you about his problems and reduce stress and anxiety sharing his problems with you. He doesn't drink because he has working problems, he drinks because he doesn't know how to deal with them, share them, express his emotions to you. The only way out is avoiding by drinking. He is probably frustrated, he doesn't like what he is living so running out of the problem is the best way, then, he drinks.
What you should do?. Do everything you can to make your environment a healthier, relaxed, relieving, comfortable place. And be all the supportive, communicative, open and understanding you can to him.
One last advice: don't argue when he is drinking, and don't accept any kind of violence. Make him understand that you love him but will not accept any kind of mistreating.
BEWARE: If this situation continue too much time he will became an addict. If this happens only a professional could help him.
Good luck!
2007-02-13 17:42:20 · answer #2 · answered by GaMMaG 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was in exactly the same situation a few years ago ( I used to drink but my hb never even tasted it) and he could smell alcohol on my breath no matter what - non-drinkers always can. The only advice I can give you is to quit drinking (you may need outside help) but life will be better and easier for you if you find a way to quit rather than constantly attempting (and failing) to hide it. It's not only your husband either, people that you think never noticed - they did! Now I haven't drank for years and I'm happier than I ever was, but I thought I hid it so well, when in fact everyone knew. Don't kid yourself, there is no way to hide it, the only answer is to quit.
2016-03-29 01:43:39 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to get all your Friends and family and organise a intervention to shame him in to realising what he is doing so he stops it himself or you can sit down and talk it out with him yourself but he may get angrier if he thinks you are just nagging him it is always safer when there are other people around you that you can draw strength from.
If he beats you than he dose not love you you have just become an outlet for his rage, leave him.
Remember you can always leave him if it gets worse there are a lot of guys out there that would treat you better and you don't have to be married to enjoy life.
2007-02-10 16:12:57 · answer #4 · answered by Hellspawn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There nothing you can do. My husband gets the same way when he drinks, I just try to make sure we have no more than 3 or 4 beers in th house at once.
2007-02-12 16:44:15 · answer #5 · answered by Luv_My_Baby 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ouch. Alcohol doing more damage than good...he needs to stop using alcohol as a crutch, and he needs to talk with you about what's bothering him. I went through a similar experience, and when I told my guy that I was concerned about him, he stopped overindulging. As far as being pushed around...NO NO NO!!! NO ONE SHOULD EVER lay a hand on you in that manner. He is your husband, and he should be comforting and supportive, not sending you away in tears. Try to see if you can talk to him before he gets a drink...tell him that you're here to listen to him, that you're here for him. It sounds like he needs to nix drinking completely, if he can't handle himself with it. Hope everything works out.
2007-02-10 16:00:51 · answer #6 · answered by Mudbug 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Humm...this is not an entirely unusual problem. Men tend to hid thier feelings of sadness behind desplays of "anger." You need to get help NOW, please, please don't wait until it becomes a more abusive situation. DO NOT let your husband get away with hitting you, let him know right now that it is totally and completly unacceptable. Tell him that you love him, and are concerned about his behavior, try to get him to talk to you and tell you how he's feeling, you could also suggest getting counceling. Please, don't let your husband wast his life away by becomeing dependant on alcohol. Do something NOW. Please. My prayers are with you and I hope the two of you can work this out sucessfully. peace and blessings for you both
2007-02-10 16:01:00 · answer #7 · answered by kefirasmom 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
first of all i hate to tell you this but your husband isnt drinking because of his job thats just an excuse to drink because he is an alcoholic.. there is nothing you can do except take yourself out of that situation you are not responsible for his actions only he is and you dont have to put up with it and if he doesnt get help with his drinking this will get worse i sugest that you go to alanon meeting it will help you
2007-02-10 16:08:40 · answer #8 · answered by crazyme 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie, his system cant tolerate alcohol, and that's why he acts the way he does. He needs to stop drinking all together, or things will get much worse for you.
2007-02-10 16:00:43 · answer #9 · answered by P-Nut 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i think he has a drinking problem,he needs to go to A.A. it is only a matter of time before he's hitting you,don't let it go that far.if he refuses to quit the only option you have is to walk away for your own sake.good luck
2007-02-10 16:08:01 · answer #10 · answered by TOM 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First he hadn't drank the booze yet so there is something going on that you two need to talk about.
2007-02-10 15:59:17 · answer #11 · answered by sideways 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋