We have been dating since Nov. Still have issues, and financial problems. But want to get married. Should we wait and if so how can waiting make it any better or worse?
2007-02-10 15:44:55 · 13 answers · asked by zunyone1974 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
As a mental health professional with 20+ years experience, now retired, I can tell you that, in your case as you state it, you "still have issues, and financial problems", and your wanting to elope is a want to bypass "issues" that need to be addressed BEFORE you get married, and eloping is a horrible option. And you've only been dating since November? You're gonna find out after it's too late, just how important those "issues" can become. As far as financial problems, well, welcome to the adult world. You'll be having those for the majority of your life. God Bless you.
2007-02-10 15:54:03 · answer #1 · answered by ? 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You should deffinately work out any issues first. Marriage is great, but hard, and the less issues starting out the better. The first two years are usually the hardest so work the issues you have out now because many more will come up latter and you won't want to have too many at once. Eloping can be fun, I kind of did, I felt bad and told my mom a couple of days before though because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.
2007-02-10 23:49:04 · answer #2 · answered by HereIAm 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First off you have not been together that long, how do you know it will last if you are having issues? I think it would be better to wait til at least some of the financial problems can be solved, say one of you take on an extra job or better one. Financial problems are one of the leading causes of divorce after all. Good-luck!
2007-02-10 23:50:12 · answer #3 · answered by Tonya M 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you have only been together since November and you are already having some problems, I suggest waiting. If you wait for 6 months or so and you are still together, problems or not, then you should be okay. You should stick it out to see if you both are willing to stay together despite the problems you have. Besides, if you have any doubts, dont get married. Divorce is a messy battle, save yourself the trouble and give it some time. Whats the rush anyway?
2007-02-10 23:52:08 · answer #4 · answered by Natalie 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Why would you elope. If you have only been dating since November, that is not very long. It also depends on your ages. I think this is something that you two should discuss with your parents if you are young. You can not possibly know enough about each other yet to get married. I would wait awhile.
2007-02-10 23:50:06 · answer #5 · answered by Dyan 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Time is like God, solves many problems. Financial matters are the most common cause of couple seeking seperation and divorce. Eloping,marrying and seperating is not a good sequence. Wait and see.
2007-02-10 23:50:53 · answer #6 · answered by J.SWAMY I ఇ జ స్వామి 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I feel that you should work more on these issues before marrying so there will be less problems in the beginning of the marriage and you also need an can benefit from pre marrital counseling. I think it is better to wait in this case.
2007-02-10 23:53:55 · answer #7 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Deal with the issues and problems first. Don't start a marriage off with "issues". You've only been dating 3 months? What's the rush?
2007-02-10 23:47:48 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, you can get married and then tackle all your problems together but that doesn't work for everyone. You are starting a life together and must be willing to work hand in hand to jump every hurdle ahead. Good luck.
2007-02-10 23:56:28 · answer #9 · answered by green_baby_dragon 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, its the right choice if you have financial problems........I say go for it!
You can have a formal wedding later on when you have the money for it.
2007-02-10 23:48:57 · answer #10 · answered by Rocker Chick 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋