As a parent I try to use lots of other forms of discipline for my children like redirecting, posistive reinforment , or time outs. I dont spank them often, but do you think it is out of line to give you child a good swat on the bottom if they do something dangerous????? My 3 1/2 yr old ran across a parking lot the other day because she didnt want to hold my hand while walking across the street/parking lot. Once in the car I gave her ONE swat on the bottom. Do you think ok to spank, give a swat on the bottom for times like this??????
2007-02-10 06:54:45 · 36 answers · asked by Luv_My_Baby 4 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
YEP. Been there, done that! I, too, have tried most of my kids lives to find alternate, creative ways to discipline as opposed to punishment, but there are definitely times, especially when they are less than 5 or 6, that a good swat is the only thing that gets their complete and undivided attention. You go, mom! Betcha you won't have to do it often!
2007-02-10 07:00:08 · answer #1 · answered by themom 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Yes, I do. I think with a child that young, a fast swat on the bottom is the quickest and the most memorable reinforcement you can give!! If the child were older, I might think differently. Small children can not "take in" all of the danger signs around them at once. Therefore, I still say that I personally, would spank the child by a swift swat to the behind and a loud warning. I admit it would scare the child. And that would certainly BE my desired effect.
(Always go with your "gut" instincts. YOU are the Mother and never forget that. You have a direct connection to your own child and only you know the absolute "best" response) Good Luck!! @8-)
2007-02-10 07:06:13 · answer #2 · answered by Dovey 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's all about consequences and that sounds like a perfectly logical consequence. At 3 and 1/2 a good swat on the bottom for running through the parking lot is a clear message to them that they did something wrong. Talking to them or putting them in time out may not create the urgency of the consequence.
It sounds like you are very reasonable with your discipline and all those various types of discipline will pay off in the long run.
The most important thing with a 3 1/2 year old is consistency, love, and a clear message - so he can be sure you are serious when you tell them something.
Finally, if you have a younger child as well or you are doing something where your hands are going to be full then go ahead and get one of those belts that connects the two of you so that your 3 year old cannot run off. Ok some people call them a leash and have problems with a kid on a leash but it will save you from having to worry about your kid running off in a parking lot or hiding in the middle of a clothes rack at the mall.
2007-02-10 07:03:49 · answer #3 · answered by Stayathomemom.com 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you are using the method of taking away toys and giving them a time out is telling them if you are bad you won't get things until you are good and you have to earn what you want as they grow....Right? Well with one Spank it will not hurt them at all...This is telling them that they really did something super bad and once you get over the fear a mother has thinking about what could have happened if the Baby was hurt in this incident...and once the baby stops crying, sit them down to explain to them why they were spanked and that you do it because you love them and don't want anything to happen to them...I think that you are okay don't worry about it, this was a good way of them to know "What can happen if they touch the fire...they get burned !!!! Now if a person hits them all the time to cause bruises that is Not right!!! Which you didn't do... You have to teach them at a young age to prevent them to do something harmful or ruin their lives once they are older!!! You are the parent and Mommy always knows best!!! Just always explain the consequences she may not fully understand it but Now A Days babies are super smart....My 4 year old amazes me sometimes!!!!!
2007-02-10 07:12:42 · answer #4 · answered by DesiGurl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YES!! That is what kids need nowadays. My parents tried different forms of punishment on me, and I must say that the most effective was spanking. When you ground your child or put them on a time out, or even take something like tv or computers away then they will not sit there thinking of what they did wrong, they will sit there thinking about how much they hate you (trust me that is how a child's mind works) However with a spanking, the punishment is quick and painful. The child will learn to fear the spanking (just like a flu shot) and comply if you use it as a threat (and back up your threats)
2007-02-10 07:00:50 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I have three boys, that are so happy, healthy and love my husband and myself. They are very well behaved, have wonderful manners, and this is because I spanked all three of them at times. Now I want to make very clear Idid not ver one single time beat them. That is where people are badly mistaken, There is a vast difference between beating and spanking. My 19 month old son responds quickly when told no, which is a great thing since I am pregnant with twins and need to know that if he is doing somehting dangerous, he will stop the moment I say no. If I have to say it a second time I swat him on the bottom. after the first couple times, now I never have to swat him. He just listens the first time. I congratulate you on making sure you child behaves. Not many do that anymore. If you enforce it now and stick with it, then later you don't have to do anything but speak. My 5 and 6 year olds never get spanked now. But my 5 year old who was very difficult and likes to push his limits go quite a few when he was younger. But now, he knows his limits and our rules.
2007-02-10 07:00:20 · answer #6 · answered by Barbara C 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
My kids have all had the odd swat on the behind in their lives. They are all growing and grown up to be well mannered and polite young people. Sometimes nothing other than a quick kick up the bum gets the point across. I would never beat my kids and I still have very vivid memories of the studded belt I got a few times as a kid. My dad was the best man in the world, but the belt is one thing I would never forgive him for.
2007-02-10 06:59:39 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
I spanked my son for chewing through an electrical cord exposing both wires so I know he was shocked. I hope the California law leaves some room by adding wording to account for extraordinary circumstances. The trend in the US is to take power away from the judge and give it to prosecutors.
There are so many stupid parents that not spanking 3 year olds will probably save lives.
2007-02-10 07:01:41 · answer #8 · answered by Ron H 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you think your child got the message you intended to send, then yes, it was the right thing to do. If you think it confused him, try another approach next time. It's not that a controlled, consciously delivered spanking is always bad, it's just that so often we do it because we are upset and frustrated and can't think of how to communicate what we want to. Sometimes, the spanking does communicate what we want, more effectively than other things might. Depends on you, and on your child, and on the situation.
2007-02-10 06:59:59 · answer #9 · answered by zilmag 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Dangerous, as in trying to reach for the stove or outlet after being told not to? Well, I think a smack beats the alternative of going to the ER for a 2nd degree burn, don't you?
Yes, I believe that is a valid reason to spank a child. But be very clear and direct as to 'why' the punishment is being given.
2007-02-10 06:59:16 · answer #10 · answered by The Gal w/the Camera 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋