I found out towards the end of our relationship that this guy i was with for 3 years, was messing around with guys. Since then, every guy that I've been with...I always question their sexuality at some point. I have ways to tell if guy has gay tendecies (based on my experience and several books that i have read on this issue). I've had a few relationships since then....and i have to say that either there is a new breed of men out here, i'm attracting a certain type of man, or i am extremely paranoid. is that normal to like second guess if the guy you are with is straight or not?
2007-02-10 06:41:58 · 17 answers · asked by angie20k 4 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
My gay Nephew says that after a couple beers, and the right stimulation, any straight guy will suddenly find his bi-sexual side.
2007-02-10 06:46:55 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
i think you need to go get your std's test and hiv right away!
that guy was scum!!!
you are not paranoid!
i have a list of questions i ask a potential guy.
1. any dui?
2. ever been in a 12 step program?
3. ever had a 3 some?
4. ever been in jail?
5. ever been arrested?
6. ever been attracted to a man?
7. do you use condoms?
8. are you willing to get tested for std's before we go out?
If they don't pass that test, or run, then i will consider them.
honesty. blunt brutal honesty.
9. do you have any children
10.do you have a g/f or b/f?
11. are you into porn? gay or straight?
12. when you were young what's your favorite memory with your dad?
13. what's the best meal your mom cooked?
14. how often do you see your family?
15. where do you go on vacation?
16. do you own a car?
17. do you have a job?
18. do you have a valid d.lic?
19. does your family speak to you?
20. what is your deepest fear that someone might find out???
WHAT ARE YOU HIDING??????
TELL ME MORE!!!
THIS is my list.
you learn a lot about someone from the family questions.
if they don't have a fav. meal that their mom cooked, then they don't have a good relationship with mom
if they don't have a favorite memory of thier dad, then they won't make a good dad.
if they don't speak to their family-- why not???
21. what do you are your friends do for fun
22. what's your favorite hobby?
2007-02-10 06:51:32 · answer #2 · answered by Lilly 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Not the guy I'm with now, no. But I have dated two other guys who I've wondered about. One of them I went out to lunch with him and his friend and his friend was like, we're so excited that he asked you out because we were all convinced he was gay! I was definitely weirded out by that...maybe his friend was just joking but maybe there were other reasons for him to make that comment. Anyway I only went out with him twice.
The other guy I dated for like three months, and I was the first girl he'd ever liked (we were in high school), and in the entire time I knew him he never mentioned another girl who he thought was attractive. We'd go to movies and he'd be like, oh, Orlando Bloom is sooo hot. He was also really into Hugh Grant. And then I'd ask him what female actress he thought was hot, and he never had an answer. He'd make it seem like no one was as hot as me, and maybe he just didn't want to express interest in any other girls at all while he was with me, out of respect for me or something, but it was weird.
To answer your question about whether it's normal to second guess, I think it definitely is for you since you had the experience you did with that one guy. I mean I think it's normal for you to always be a little bit worried, but you should think about whether it's just your own nervousness or whether there really are signs. Maybe you should have some of your friends hang out with you and your boyfriend and get their opinions, since they might be less nervous about this than you.
I think it's that you're both sort of a paranoid and that men are different than they used to be. Stereotypical gender roles have changed a lot and now it's okay for guys to do things like cook, clean house, stay home with kids, like to shop, be sensitive, even knit. So maybe things that would have once made it seem like a guy was gay don't indicate that any more.
2007-02-10 06:59:45 · answer #3 · answered by cg17 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think it's not so strange to second guess guys after the experience you've had. But you are driving yourself nuts like this. On the other hand, you never know for sure that a guy is totally heterosexual just as you never know if a guy is gonna be faith-full so maybe you should just let it go and date whoever you want. I'm sure mister right is out there for you.
2007-02-10 06:47:53 · answer #4 · answered by chocolatebunny 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My husband started out with such sweet, sincere thoughts and ideas that only after I was married I started to wonder that thought. Time went on and I continued to question him inside my head but would never say anything, what he did, said, or acted like was like no macho guy that I have ever known. Finally, after talking to him about it, it got the better of me and I said something, that he disclosed himself to me: He was so into God that he didn't care that his goofiness, nonchalantness, not-into-sportsness, caring for my children-ness, expressing his feelings-ness, crying-ness, etc did not matter to him, only that God would show His glory through any situation. My husband turned me on to God by how he acted and it was not by mistreating me or neglect, nor infatuation and putting me on a pedastel. It was by treating me like a person, with emotions and real feelings, which I confused for homosexuallity since my upbringing was through TV or mainstream life. I wish gay attitudes weren't so common, since men do feel emotions, but because they have this fear of being called gay, they tend to hide themselves from people and just watch football or work on cars (or whatever they do, my husband would rather take a nap with me, or take my son to fly his kite.) On the other side of the coin, though, the men that do have these types of personallities feel such pressure from society to "admit" (or submit themselves, really,) to being gay, because they can't handle the pressure of having these feelings that people, because they watch TV, call them gay. Men in this society have it rough and I feel for them, they either need to make lots of money or be an expert at something or have great ideas.......What if someone just cares?
2007-02-10 06:59:45 · answer #5 · answered by kaliroadrager 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have never ever ever had any doubt about my husband's sexuality. You are attracting one type of guy, you should examine that and aim for the opposite.
2007-02-10 06:45:02 · answer #6 · answered by Jilli Bean 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think it is normal to question your man's sexuality and be serious about it. I mess around with my husband about him being gaybut it is just kidding. If you are really wondering, then you probably don't need to be in that relationship.
2007-02-10 06:45:27 · answer #7 · answered by jacemo 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think you're paranoid. This guy messed you up and it wasn't right of him to cheat on you, with anyone.
2007-02-10 06:45:04 · answer #8 · answered by FaerieWhings 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
yeah i've questioned mine a couple times just to be sure...in your case it's normal to ask every guy your with to be sure cuz you don't wanna go thru that again. i would be devastated.
2007-02-10 06:55:23 · answer #9 · answered by LaLaLaa♥ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Asks like good old fashioned paranoia to me.
2007-02-10 06:45:29 · answer #10 · answered by Chris D 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋